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How to measure things like a Canadian


AthenA

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I just laughed out loud because... I'm not proud to say it, but it's so true ! 
 

 

How to measure things like a Canadian.jpg

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I still think imperial, makes more sense to me as metric units are either too big or too small for practical purposes, only better bit is money, never liked groats and florins.

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2 hours ago, RobMc said:

I still think imperial, makes more sense to me as metric units are either too big or too small for practical purposes, only better bit is money, never liked groats and florins.

That's because you come from an "Imperialistic Empire," full of lust, and greed, and thoughts of world-conquest, and  "Delusions of Grandeur . . .!!

You Brits gonna invade us a "third" time? 

(Crap, here comes Yoda . . .):  "HHHHMMMMMMNNNNN!!!!????!!!"

Just kidding, buddy.  Nothing directed at you, personally.  It was only "rhetorical."

LMFAO!!!  We Americans love our "Staunchest Allies," and "GOOD" will always over-come "evil."  Ayaq

EDIT:  Had to, because we, as "civilized nations," have to combat evil.  The Battle is not over, yet . . . and I wish it would be, soon.  I can't understand why we collectively spend trillions of dollars on military budgets, trying to find a better way to kill each other, when there's cancer and other diseases to cure, and so many hungry . . . And, why are we spending billions of dollars on ways to "colonize" Mars, when we have our own problems to fix here, on our planet, Mother Earth?  Our Mother is weeping . . . Ayaq

Edited by AyaqGuyaq
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6 hours ago, AyaqGuyaq said:

That's because you come from an "Imperialistic Empire," full of lust, and greed, and thoughts of world-conquest, and  "Delusions of Grandeur . . .!!

You Brits gonna invade us a "third" time? 

Hey no delusions buddy, hard fact, our pioneering spirit had us rule most of the world and we started the Industrial Revolution, with great engineering and invention. However our socialist utopia now has us terrified of our own shadows, everything you say is now offensive to some minority, freedoms have long gone and the sad thing is that people are totally unaware of it and think it normal. We are ripe for the picking, no one ever learns through history, these are facts you can check, the Royal Navy the most powerful in the world for centuries does not have enough men to man what few vessels remain nor enough money to put to sea more than a few weeks a year. We put so called refugees in better housing than we do our troops, god forbid they kill someone as they will end up in court, we currently have two policeman on murder charges for using their tasers when on duty etc etc etc. The following old joke sums up the current situation perfectly, you all keep a bed for me over there, I may yet need it in my lifetime.

Nelson: "Order the signal, Hardy."

Hardy: "Aye, aye sir."

Nelson: "Hold on, that's not what I dictated to Flags. What's the
meaning of this?"

Hardy: "Sorry sir?"

Nelson (reading aloud): "' England expects every person to do his or
her duty, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, religious
persuasion or disability.' - What gobbledegook is this?"

Hardy: "Admiralty policy, I'm afraid, sir. We're an equal
opportunities employer now. We had the devil's own job getting '
England ' past the censors, lest it be considered racist."

Nelson: "Gadzooks, Hardy. Hand me my pipe and tobacco."

Hardy: "Sorry sir. All naval vessels have now been designated
smoke-free working environments."

Nelson: "In that case, break open the rum ration. Let us splice the
mainbrace to steel the men before battle."

Hardy: "The rum ration has been abolished, Admiral. Its part of the
Government's policy on binge drinking."

Nelson: "Good heavens, Hardy. I suppose we'd better get on with it
........... full speed ahead."

Hardy: "I think you'll find that there's a 4 knot speed limit in this
stretch of water."

Nelson: "Damn it man! We are on the eve of the greatest sea battle in
history. We must advance with all dispatch. Report from the crow's
nest please."

Hardy: "That won't be possible, sir."

Nelson: "What?"

Hardy: "Health and Safety have closed the crow's nest, sir. No
harness; and they said that rope ladders don't meet regulations. They
won't let anyone up there until a proper scaffolding can be erected."

Nelson: "Then get me the ship's carpenter without delay, Hardy."

Hardy: "He's busy knocking up a wheelchair access to the foredeck
Admiral."

Nelson: "Wheelchair access? I've never heard anything so absurd."

Hardy: "Health and safety again, sir. We have to provide a
barrier-free environment for the differently abled."

Nelson: "Differently abled? I've only one arm and one eye and I refuse
even to hear mention of the word. I didn't rise to the rank of admiral
by playing the disability card."

Hardy: "Actually, sir, you did. The Royal Navy is under represented in
the areas of visual impairment and limb deficiency."

Nelson: "Whatever next? Give me full sail. The salt spray beckons."

Hardy: "A couple of problems there too, sir. Health and safety won't
let the crew up the rigging without hard hats. And they don't want
anyone breathing in too much salt - haven't you seen the adverts?"

Nelson: "I've never heard such infamy. Break out the cannon and tell
the men to stand by to engage the enemy."

Hardy: "The men are a bit worried about shooting at anyone, Admiral."

Nelson: "What? This is mutiny!"

Hardy: "It's not that, sir. It's just that they're afraid of being
charged with murder if they actually kill anyone. There's a couple of
legal-aid lawyers on board, watching everyone like hawks."

Nelson: "Then how are we to sink the Frenchies and the Spanish?"

Hardy: "Actually, sir, we're not."

Nelson: "We're not?"

Hardy: "No, sir. The French and the Spanish are our European partners
now. According to the Common Fisheries Policy, we shouldn't even be in
this stretch of water. We could get hit with a claim for
compensation."

Nelson: "But you must hate a Frenchman as you hate the devil."

Hardy: "I wouldn't let the ship's diversity co-ordinator hear you
saying that sir. You'll be up on disciplinary report."

Nelson: "You must consider every man an enemy, who speaks ill of your
King."

Hardy: "Not any more, sir. We must be inclusive in this multicultural
age. Now put on your Kevlar vest; it's the rules. It could save your
life"

Nelson: "Don't tell me - health and safety. Whatever happened to rum,
sodomy and the lash?"

Hardy: As I explained, sir, rum is off the menu! And there's a ban on
corporal punishment."

Nelson: "What about sodomy?"

Hardy: "I believe that is now legal, sir."

Nelson: "In that case............................... kiss me, Hardy."
 

Edited by RobMc
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8 hours ago, AthenA said:

I just laughed out loud because... I'm not proud to say it, but it's so true ! 
 

 

 

It's the same for me over I measure truck beds in feet but the cargo sizing is always metric in exporting them

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12 hours ago, AthenA said:

I just laughed out loud because... I'm not proud to say it, but it's so true ! 
 

 

How to measure things like a Canadian.jpg

lol

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12 hours ago, AyaqGuyaq said:

That's because you come from an "Imperialistic Empire," full of lust, and greed, and thoughts of world-conquest, and  "Delusions of Grandeur . . .!!

You Brits gonna invade us a "third" time? 

(Crap, here comes Yoda . . .):  "HHHHMMMMMMNNNNN!!!!????!!!"

Just kidding, buddy.  Nothing directed at you, personally.  It was only "rhetorical."

LMFAO!!!  We Americans love our "Staunchest Allies," and "GOOD" will always over-come "evil."  Ayaq

EDIT:  Had to, because we, as "civilized nations," have to combat evil.  The Battle is not over, yet . . . and I wish it would be, soon.  I can't understand why we collectively spend trillions of dollars on military budgets, trying to find a better way to kill each other, when there's cancer and other diseases to cure, and so many hungry . . . And, why are we spending billions of dollars on ways to "colonize" Mars, when we have our own problems to fix here, on our planet, Mother Earth?  Our Mother is weeping . . . Ayaq

Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!!! Finished off the weekly stash by Today!!!

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When I was in grade school...many years ago, I clearly remember being taught that " The sun never sets on the British Empire ", this meaning that the UK had colonies all over the world, that the sun was shining on UK somewhere all the time.  I was truly impressed by that.  Is that still true?  Guess I could google it...but I'm just gonna be lazy

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30 minutes ago, spinpuppy said:

When I was in grade school...many years ago, I clearly remember being taught that " The sun never sets on the British Empire ", this meaning that the UK had colonies all over the world, that the sun was shining on UK somewhere all the time.  I was truly impressed by that.  Is that still true?  Guess I could google it...but I'm just gonna be lazy

Yes we still have close relationships with the Commonwealth even though most are independent now, but a lot have our Queen as their Queen. So in a way there is somewhere worldwide where the sun is shining, an hour is fifteen degrees of longitude. With  an average day of say eight hours that is one third of the world minimum lit at any one time, as far as I can see there is a colony or dependency or commonwealth country that fits in everywhere, seasons permitting. Would you like to give us New England back ? we need the full set.

Edited by RobMc
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17 hours ago, RobMc said:

 

Hardy: "Not any more, sir. We must be inclusive in this multicultural
age. Now put on your Kevlar vest; it's the rules. It could save your
life"

Nelson: "Don't tell me - health and safety. Whatever happened to rum,
sodomy and the lash?"

 

Hey, buddy, two things:  (1) THAT WAS A FRICKIN' GREAT STORY--WE SHOULD WRITE A BOOK TOGETHER!!!; and (2) What in frick' is da reference to "sodomy," in your tale of sailing ships that were set out to sea, for months, upon months, at a time . . . Hmm?  Lol!  Ayaq

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19 minutes ago, AyaqGuyaq said:

Hey, buddy, two things:  (1) THAT WAS A FRICKIN' GREAT STORY--WE SHOULD WRITE A BOOK TOGETHER!!!; and (2) What in frick' is da reference to "sodomy," in your tale of sailing ships that were set out to sea, for months, upon months, at a time . . . Hmm?  Lol!  Ayaq

1/. We could write a childrens story together, with a modern twist, Roald Dahl and Harry Potter made a few bob ? First idea, Barry the bisexual bunny ? who cross dresses in fox furs alienating him from the other bunnies, he is forced to live in a burrow with a wicked weasel who pimps him out as a rent boy. Then one day when crossing a field he discovers magic mushrooms, before long he is running a mushroom empire, and that is why rabbits hop ??? Schools will love it.

2/. Sodomy, don't know what you mean, but I'll get to the bottom of it, promise.

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11 hours ago, TBB said:

Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!!! Finished off the weekly stash by Today!!!

LAUGH-MY-PROVERBIAL-FRICKIN'-ASS-OFF, TBB!!!!

I think you might be a few years' "longer-in-da-proverbial tooth," than I am, sir . . .

If you give me your name and address (and I'll give you mine), and you send me a 30-year old bottle of single-malt, Scotch whiskey, kind sir, and ask me to pour it over your grave, I will, kind sir.  But, would it be okay with you, kind sir, if the Scotch passed through my kidneys, first?  (Crap, Frickin' Yoda is charging da frickin' stage again . . . (scuffling sounds . . .) "HHHMMMMMNNNNN!!!!!???!!!!"  Ayaq

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3 hours ago, RobMc said:

2/. Sodomy, don't know what you mean, but I'll get to the bottom of it, promise.

:lol:

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On 11/20/2019 at 4:06 AM, AthenA said:

I just laughed out loud because... I'm not proud to say it, but it's so true ! 

Lol! Even in the French part @AthenA? Dans ce cas, il faudrait prendre des mesures ! ?

@RobMc Btw, I was so shocked to discover the Nelson's column in the middle of Montreal! It should have been a Charles de Gaulle's statue. "Vive le Québec libre !" ?:lol:

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22 hours ago, RobMc said:

Hey no delusions buddy, hard fact, our pioneering spirit had us rule most of the world and we started the Industrial Revolution, with great engineering and invention. However our socialist utopia now has us terrified of our own shadows, everything you say is now offensive to some minority, freedoms have long gone and the sad thing is that people are totally unaware of it and think it normal. We are ripe for the picking, no one ever learns through history, these are facts you can check, the Royal Navy the most powerful in the world for centuries does not have enough men to man what few vessels remain nor enough money to put to sea more than a few weeks a year. We put so called refugees in better housing than we do our troops, god forbid they kill someone as they will end up in court, we currently have two policeman on murder charges for using their tasers when on duty etc etc etc. The following old joke sums up the current situation perfectly, you all keep a bed for me over there, I may yet need it in my lifetime.

@RobMc The same in France, except for the navy :lol:

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30 minutes ago, VHS2 said:

Btw, I was so shocked to discover the Nelson's column in the middle of Montreal! It should have been a Charles de Gaulle's statue. "Vive le Québec libre !" 

We own it don't forget it, otherwise  a duel you me and Frenchi baguettes at 5 paces and mine will be seeded.

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27 minutes ago, RobMc said:

We own it don't forget it

What would be @AthenA's stance about that?

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31 minutes ago, RobMc said:

a duel you me and Frenchi baguettes at 5 paces

The paces, measured in meters or feet? (@AthenA  ?)

OK for the duel with @FRENCHI if he can ride his horse... Of course, you are equipped with Nelson's pistol and I'm happy with my machine gun

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15 minutes ago, VHS2 said:

and I'm happy with my machine gun

I've seen you use that in game, I'm safe ?

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19 hours ago, VHS2 said:

Lol! Even in the French part @AthenA? Dans ce cas, il faudrait prendre des mesures ! ?

@RobMc Btw, I was so shocked to discover the Nelson's column in the middle of Montreal! It should have been a Charles de Gaulle's statue. "Vive le Québec libre !" ?:lol:

Vraiment, c'est comme ça qu'on mesure ces choses au Québec ! lol

 

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