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Married One Night: A man and a woman, who have never met before, but are both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper bunk and she in the lower. At 1:00 AM, the man leaned over and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold." "I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married." "Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed. "Good," she replied. "Get your own damn blanket!" After a moment of silence, he farted.

So I've invented the perfect drink for Call of Duty, and studied its effectiveness over the last few weeks of playing freeze tag. I share with you fine folks now the results: First, the drink. You may have to improvise some of the ingredients if you're not a chemistry/physics teacher. Also, it helps to be Irish Catholic. Irish for the genetic tolerance to alcohol, and Catholic to have the training in dealing with the guilt over things you do when you drink. The property tax bill is optional. But it helps in developing the proper level of anger to maximize in-game motivation to kill people. You start by taking a tumbler glass that you just tried to make a vodka martini in but then dumped out when you realized you don't have any olives. Don't clean it. Take three shots of very good bourbon and pour over ice that's been in the freezer since the first Obama administration. Put a teaspoon of sugar in. Then two shots of bitters that have been in your cabinet for at least a year. Go to the fridge to find a lemon to rind so you can finish the old-fashioned you're trying to make, and realize you don't have any. Remember you've never had any, because you don't like lemons. Grab some orange preserves instead and, using your pinky finger as a measuring device, put the end of one finger of the preserves into the tumbler. Then a shot of Irish Whisky, to honor the ancestors. Then another shot of Irish Whisky for flavor. Stir with your pointer finger, before realizing that you haven't washed your hands since setting up a chemistry lab that uses lead and manganese compounds. Set it on top of your incredibly absurd property tax bill as a coaster, which is in turn on top of the four hours of work you have to do before class tomorrow but won't bother starting until the drink is gone. Enjoy. I named it the Dirty Old Fashioned Inbred Irishman, after myself. And attached is the summary of data I've collected on the efficacy of this beverage in game, along with some anecdotal commentary on some recurring patterns I've noticed while collecting data. Sláinte Idiots!

https://techcrunch.com/2017/11/26/in-praise-of-teslas-bankruptcy/ I have never been impressed with Elon Musk. Can't understand all the hype, and all the taxpayer funded grants showered upon this circus salesman. Look behind the curtain, and you'll see a grand manipulator squandering money. Finally, an article that mirrors what real people see.

Picture from @Joe Canadian 's private photo album

I am right there with you. He has repackaged old technologies and everyone thinks he is great. He doesn’t even make his own batteries Of course he built the gigabit battery making facility in Nevada , but Panasonic is contracted to make the batteries. A friend of mine worked for Tesla The cars were so poorly assembled that they had to use a lot of seam sealer on the body panel joints to get them to pass water inspections. They have never turned a profit and have never met any production schedule. His hyper loop is the biggest joke of all. It’s nothing more than a maglev train in a vacuum tube. The power to evacuate the air from the tube would be incredible and would take awhile to do it. The human body could never handle the stress of any turn at the speeds he says it will do unless they are stretched over miles. But people buy into it and keep investing into these schemes can’t stand the guy.

I will be there for sure...

Town getting ready for Christmas and a beautiful Winters sunset.

lmao.. Only from the mind a chemistry professor. And I am funny in all zones.. Just ask me.. As for the penguin zone., lol I bet if you ask around, that would be much larger then shown ...lol Nicely done.. Now as for the drink, You had me at three very good shots of bourbon....

Good one @Blackbart, omg I've got so much to reveal about you.... but don't despair I will honor my word and keep those DARK secrets to myself...FU@TBB this is all your fault

Ok, but the question remains.........did your concoction taste any good??? Please summarize THOSE findings in a powerpoint presentation or a youtube video........and thank you

What da? Joe has a sow (female bear) costume too? In addition to his cow moose costume? What else, @Joe Canadian--Elk? Buffalo? Doe? Hmm? Lol. Ayaq

There is only 3/4 night maps in rotation compared to over 14 day maps. Me personally I don't mind the odd 1 or 2 night map's. I think it will have to be decided by more players There is also 2 maps that are taking out of server #2 which are Station and Sinjar due to badly placed spawns I mean like what would you rather... 2 spawn camp maps or no night maps

I will not fit in a "CAT 1" box Roxy... HAHAHA

and can not shut down from task manager for it's not shown, need to reboot to get hid of it wonder if its spyware messing up game

It is also based on what position you take. But unfortantly in this case I can’t always tell if it is flat on the back or on the knees

OMG this could be a disaster on the scale of the unwarranted downfall of the Reliant Robin, the UK economy has never recovered (although we did manage to export lots of De Loreans your way - thanks for buying them). To make matters worse I have just invested in a 500 mile cable to enable me to visit Granny in my new smart car?????

Electric car = Coal powered car johnny

Yup people want to believe that the electric car is worthwhile... Maybe one day, but not yet. Meanwhile the snake oil salesman were getting your taxpayer dollars and duping investors hand over fist based on a fantasy...

WE NEED MORE PEOPLE TO PLAY THIS GAME

It's Darlo m8 non worth stealing lol

Glad to get COD2 fixed up for ya man

Well done fluffy bunny.

thanks loader .for the help..gave a call and we will do lunch 1 week on a Wednesday ..

I will definitely be there!

This brought a smile to my face. Lol thank you fluffy.

Haven't seen that Crunch,but my COD2 mp wont launch and I bought the game from STEAM,I switch to multi player and it starts then black screen and I can't shut down with task manager I have to reboot also.

Happy Birthday MALE !!

lol. hilarious. I too pay too much property tax. If only i had the schooling to be able to get the manganese ration just right. Let me know if you found that home address. I might join you haha

So cute and nice decision Jeroen ... I'm looking for my new addition also.

Delicious. The manganese gives it a perfect zing.

He has female costumes of all animals...He's an equal opportunity cross dresser...

The cat came in that box..... look on the right.. CAT 1

Took me 3 years of dating and "listening" while I could've just go and buy me one....lesson learned!

Glad to see you finally got a little pussy @Jeroen v.2

Happy Birthday

I will be there as always. Won't miss it. Thanks Loader.