RobMc Posted June 10, 2017 Member ID: 25355 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 31 Topic Count: 272 Topics Per Day: 0.09 Content Count: 5824 Content Per Day: 1.87 Reputation: 9236 Achievement Points: 63677 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 141 Joined: 12/14/16 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 14 Birthday: 01/05/1954 Device: Windows Posted June 10, 2017 As I live on the border we make fun of each other a lot heres two, only Scots may get the first :- Two neds walking down the road in Glasgow, 1st Ned 'Ach your lace is loose Angus', 2nd Ned 'Nae it isn't, it says on the bottom Taiwan'. A Cockney (London) wins a fortune on the lottery, being from the city he's always dreamt of living miles from anyone, so buys a wee croft up in the Cairngorms, miles from anywhere. Two weeks later, sitting by a peat fire, blizzard raging outside there's a knock on the door, he opens it. This huge Scotsman is standing there, Red hair, long ginger beard, kilt, sporran and dagger (dirk) in his sock. Scotsman - 'Och I'm Mctavish from the next croft and I've come to invite you to a wee cèilidh (dance) Cockney = 'Oh what is that?' Scotsman = 'Och you know, you have a wee dram, a bite to eat, a wee drink and afterwards wild sex' Cockney = 'Sounds great, hold on I'll get ready' Scotsman = 'Ach theres no need to bother, there'll only be the two of us'
Recommended Posts