PimpedOutPete

Shamu 10 Rules for Dating My Daughter One: If you pull into my driveway and honk, you’d better be delivering a pizza, because you are definitely not picking anything up. Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me…If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off my daughter’s body, I will gladly remove said items from your body. Three: I am aware that it is fashionable for boys to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hip. In order to ensure that your clothes do not come off during the course of your date I will take my nail gun and securely fasten your trousers to your waist. You will also be assessed the cost of the nails. Four: I’m sure that, in this day of sexual awareness, you are aware that sex without using a “barrier method” of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate. When it comes to sex, I am the barrier and I will kill you. Five: In order for us to get along we should talk about sports, politics and other current events. Please do not bother. The only information I need from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house. A one-word answer is all that is required. Repeat after me…….”Early”. Six: You may date other girls as long as my daughter approves. Otherwise, once you have dated my daughter you will date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry. Seven: As you stand in the foyer waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh or fidget. If you want to be on time for a movie you should not be dating. Instead of standing there being useless you could cut my grass. Eight: The following places are not appropriate for dating my daughter. Places where there are beds, sofas or anything softer than a wooden stool…. where there are no parents, policemen or nuns within eyesight…..where there is darkness…where there is dancing, holding hands or happiness. Movies with strong romantic theme or sexual content are not permitted. Chainsaws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folk’s homes are better. Nine: Do not lie to me. If I ask you where you are going you have one chance only to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel and 5 acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me. Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. As soon as you return from your date and pull into the driveway exit the car immediately with both hands in view. Announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home early and safely and return to your car. There is no need for you to come inside. Do not push your luck. Consider yourself fortunate, you have survived……for the time being. With all these hot looking daughters showing up I thought I would re-post these rules. I should have had that posted on the back of the door..

Nice lol..

I love Barry... makes me laugh all the time.. Check out his groves.. I need a pair!

Great pic baldie.. good looking family guy.. Cheers

3rdCdnInfty hxtr 3rdCdnInfty I am dreaading one day when I have kids that if one of them is a girl. I would love to have a daughter but the thought of all those guys out there, who think about sex always would kill me 3rd!!!!!!!!!!!! yes i hear you bro............ but my love for my daughter can not be replaced. So glad I had her and thought/think the same way about them dicks. Cool we love our kids... even our girls. Not the same in other places. Have a daughter.......... they are so wonderful and yes.. very hard at time. if I do happen have a daughter and I probably will cause my parents had all boys so I may only have girls. I would be happy and I will just make sure that she is ready as can be for the world, but I hope I have like 3 sons before a girl casue they will deal with the guys I cant quote anything when it comes to boys since we had two girls.. As much as they gave me grey hair, I would never trade a moment without them... Butterfly kisses peeps..

Good post Gorilla and I say that with the upmost respect...

Same here..Its been to long since I played poker with you peeps..Hope to do it again... Pete

Im going Globals boys.... Tapping Johns and developing markets.....

Happy Birthday you two.. I hope u have a great day.. Cheers

Great job.. Looks amazing my friend..

Lol.. Big money to make in dives like that..

Dam Hx, you know all the best places dont you... *hahahaha

Welcome to the forums and enjoy the servers.. Cheers

Happy Birthday my fellow Idiots.. I hope u all have a great day tomorrow.. Cheers

Welcome to the group... Cheers

hxtr Nice Pete.. and you almost look normal. Your daughters and nice are very cute. Great job bro. I miss my daughter... sniff sniff Thx Hx... Both are in Uni, 1st & 3rd year nursing... I give all the credit to my wife, thats where they get their looks from..

Dam!... He obvious missed the meeting that states...`Never get bitch slapped by a John`.... That dude gives Pimps a bad name..

Its tough having daughters.. Sarah (my youngest with me and Kelsey my oldest with my niece.

Not Sure... Whom is she Hx

Happy Birthday...

hahaha good one Gorilla...

Lol.. Only a Canadian would truely get that... Good one Joe..

Have a great birthday..Cheers

Welcome to the group... Cheers

Welcome to the group.