Feeling dumb this will help

[Dark Asylumn]

If you ever feel a little bit stupid, just dig this up and read it again; you'll begin to think you're a genius...



Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? 

Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever." 

Alabama's Heather Whitestone, Miss America 1995.
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"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." 

--Mariah Carey 
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"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life." 

-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign 
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"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body." 

--Winston Bennett,  University   of  Kentucky   basketball forward.
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"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country" 

--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC .

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"That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it." 

--A congressional candidate in Texas .
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"Half this game is ninety percent mental." 

--Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark
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"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it..." 

--Al Gore, Vice President
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"I love California . I practically grew up in  Phoenix

-- Dan Quayle 
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"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?" 

--Lee Iacocca
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"The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." 

--Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst. 
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"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people." 

-- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.

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"Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances." 

--Department of Social Services, Greenville , SC
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"Traditionally, most of Australia 's imports come from overseas." 

--Keppel Enderbery 
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"If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record." 

-- Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman
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Feeling smarter yet? 

Send this on to?
your brilliant friends.

[Arrienn]

lol good stuff. this makes me want to go find more moronic quotes from famous people. Now is the perfect time to say, "Fame isn't everything!" lmao

[ghost]

"Hawaii is a unique state. It is a small state. It is a state that is by itself. It is a --it is different from the other 49 states. Well, all states are different, but it's got a particularly unique situation."

- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President

 

 

 

"What we have is two important values in conflict: freedom of speech and our desire for healthy campaigns and a healthy democracy. You can't have both."

- Dick Gephardt, Missouri representative

 

 

 

"The war did not turn in Japan's favor, and trends of the world are not advantageous to us."

- Japan's Emperor Hirohito, announcing his country's surrender to America and its WWII allies, after two atom bombs had been dropped.

 

 

 

"Yes, maam? Right here, this lady. No, she! Yes, right, second row. Next to the guy in the blue shirt, holding her left hand up. It's a he? Sorry about that. Gotta be careful. I'm very sorry. Go ahead! I'm, excuse me, I'm very sorry. Go, ah, I, a thousand apologies, go ahead."

- George Bush Sr., Former U.S. President, at a press conference

 

 

 

"I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were ever supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."

- Heather Whitestone, Miss Alabama. In the 1994 Miss USA contest, when asked if she would want to live forever.

 

 

 

"Whenever I watch TV and I see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I would love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."

- Mariah Carey, Pop Singer