BigPapaDean

Feeling bored out of my mind but nothing I normally do to break the doldrums has helped. I think I am having an anxiety attack but different than before! Also in a very weird mood today!

Matthew 7-127 There came unto him a woman having an alabaster box of very precious ointment, and poured it on his head, as he sat at meat.8 But when his disciples saw it, they had indignation, saying, To what purpose is this waste?9 For this ointment might have been sold for much, and given to the poor.10 When Jesus understood it, he said unto them, Why trouble ye the woman? for she hath wrought a good work upon me.11 For ye have the poor always with you; but me ye have not always.12 For in that she hath poured this ointment on my body, she did it for my burial.This scripture shows how even those closes to Jesus was more concentrated on what THEY could do than having their focus on Him. He wasn't condemning them for the thoughts but rather wanted them to redirect their thoughts toward Him. Some times we judge someone for a deed we misinterpret as a wasted deed, when they were directed to do what they did for another more important reason. After all who is the one who gave Himself for our transgressions? We shouldn't worry about things we do not understand and control be keep our mind upon our own selves considering we can't see and know everything about any given situation! We have times all the time where we can do good deeds but it may be somebody's last day so why are we focusing on others and what they are doing instead of what the good Lord has for us to do on the special occasions? Those opportunities are not an everyday thing but only when God directs us to move in that direction! You may be the last person to show them love and comfort! The feeling of missed opportunities are not something anyone needs to be carrying around with them because there again it takes your attention off of Christ and His Blood and what He did for you! Open your hearts and minds and let Him lead you places you can never go without His leadership in your life! You will have the fulfillment in your heart you never knew existed! This isn't for reward but fulfillment of His spirit like you have never experience before. The reward will come but not because of this! It will come simply because He will give it to you! Just keep your eye singled upon Him!God bless and Stay safe! Love you all, Dean!!!

In today's world we face a multitude of challenges as believers! Some are so sly as to hide within the very core of the belief system we incorporate to live by! I don't like using this but it's in the news everywhere so I feel compelled to use it as an example here. The way the extremist Muslims get children to do their most wicked deeds is they make them a promise. These young boys know what women are so this is an easy sell in a society and culture where life is not valued very high. They tell them if they wear a vest with a ton of C4 explosives into a crowd of unbelievers and blow them selves up that they will have a reward of 72 virgins waiting for them in the after life. What boy wouldn't be enamored by such a promise? They key here is it has to be non-believers! I use this to show how RELIGION pollutes any belief system. If you think for a moment this hasn't crept into the Christian faith you are sadly mistaken. I have asked many believers this question,"Why do you believe in God?" And almost unequivocally it is the following response! "I want to go to heaven." Why do you want to go to heaven? "Because the streets are paved with gold and all those other fantastic things." You see their first thought wasn't about how God loved them and saved them through the amazing precious "BLOOD" of Jesus it was about things they don't have now. I have learned that this life is so fleeting that the things we don't have are not necessary or needed! I also have sat in testimonial sessions and heard the same kinds of statements in testimonies! I am sure they love the Lord but He doesn't seem to be at the forefront of their minds. We as Christians and who believe we are nothing without Christ should take a moment each day to ask Him to help us in this change we should make to receive the fullness of His promises! We should be focusing on the re-warder and not the reward! This is an attitude of today's world we live in! They seem to always ask,"What's in it for me?" I have also heard evangelist use the reward to lure people into confessing faith in God when they were really confessing faith in the reward! You see there is a word that describes this and we don't think it has anything to do with ourselves as that is just wrong. Yet we let it slip in and corrupt us to where we take our eyes of the one that makes it all possible. Are you "GREEDY?" I dare say that there have been and still are greedy! I learned some hard lessons about this when I was out in that cold dark world among people who struggle just to survive. Some of us begin helping others when we could and the whole attitude of the ones we affected changed. We who have what we need should be able to accomplish this among us, right? I will leave you with that question and please speak your peace! God bless each and every one of you!

Any doubters now?

I have heard it said many times over that God wants us to have a thankful heart! I have wondered what that even means. After several long drawn out roads that tested my integrity with God I am now beginning to understand what it really means. I read in the Bible all those stories of the old time people like Job and Abraham and I use to wonder how they ever stayed the course. When you read those stories you can see the human side of each of them where they made mistakes. My road lead me down some of those same paths and I made some of the same mistakes but my faith didn't waver much like theirs never. While I was living that life I prayed everyday for His deliverance yet it just wasn't His time! That's when I would ask Him to help me make it through each day so when it was His time I would be ready to receive whatever blessing or blessings He had for me. The day finally came when my prayers were answered and I was delivered from my life of hardship and suffering to one of love and happiness with my family! As I look back now I am so thankful He saw fit to let me be tested in the many ways I was tested because now I know He was surely with me through it all and He was the one who gave me the strength and patience to make it through! This is what I believe that phrase, to have a "thankful heart", truly means! I have much praise because He never left and forsook me in my darkest hours and He brought me through things I didn't think I could survive but he brought me home more than conqueror! It's easy to be thankful for all the things that make our lives easy but what about those things that give us a real sense of belonging to Him? Yeah I appreciate more than you know all the comforts of life I now have but I appreciate much more the love God has for me and I KNOW without a doubt He will keep me in the palm of His hand where nothing can touch or harm me! God Bless each of you and have a wonderful weekend!

Happy Friday

Kris Porter I wrote this not too long after my breakdown! It is indicative of my search for myself as well as the love of my life!My Deep Red Rose!As I walk through my garden of beautiful flowers, there are blooms of red, white and blue.There are yellow, pink and purple and like the rainbow many flowers of a variety of hues.Every one of them are beautiful and lovely each in there own right but none, no none of thoseHad the appeal and the aroma as the most magically alluring of all flowers my dark red rose!I have looked both high and low, over mountain and in the deep set f island covesNever to find the flower that steals my heart and draws me to it like cooing doves.Then on one delightful morn just as I was about ready to concede in my searchThere in the valley on a knoll I espied her sitting there like a canary on her perch.And the song she sang was so beautiful to my longing ears of my heart I cried.Because there was the sound in my ears of my heart, but I thought it had died.To my amazement this beauty that few eyes have ever seen was my deep red rose.I was afraid to touch her lest I slay the moment then she cried, Take me and heaven knowsI have been here all these long lonely years waiting for you to come and free me from my rootsAnd give me my freedom to experience what you have to give to me the love of loves.Now we can fly away forever more you and me on the wings of white love doves.I have no want or need of pleasure or sensations as you give me it all with a single touch.Your breath gives me life I had lost and your beauty has my heart in awe just as much.I wake in the morn and the first thing I do is feel to see if you are definetly, undisputebly realBecause of you I am alive in my soul again and this wonderful love I again am able to feel.Love is a fleeting emotion but when its spirit bound it grows and adheres to each heartSo that the two hearts beating unite to become one in mind, body, and soul.

Kris PorterMy Deep Red Rose!As I walk through my garden of beautiful flowers, there are blooms of red, white and blue.There are yellow, pink and purple and like the rainbow many flowers of a variety of hues.Every one of them are beautiful and lovely each in there own right but none, no none of thoseHad the appeal and the aroma as the most magically alluring of all flowers my dark red rose!I have looked both high and low, over mountain and in the deep set f island covesNever to find the flower that steals my heart and draws me to it like cooing doves.Then on one delightful morn just as I was about ready to concede in my searchThere in the valley on a knoll I espied her sitting there like a canary on her perch.And the song she sang was so beautiful to my longing ears of my heart I cried.Because there was the sound in my ears of my heart, but I thought it had died.To my amazement this beauty that few eyes have ever seen was my deep red rose.I was afraid to touch her lest I slay the moment then she cried, Take me and heaven knowsI have been here all these long lonely years waiting for you to come and free me from my rootsAnd give me my freedom to experience what you have to give to me the love of loves.Now we can fly away forever more you and me on the wings of white love doves.I have no want or need of pleasure or sensations as you give me it all with a single touch.Your breath gives me life I had lost and your beauty has my heart in awe just as much.I wake in the morn and the first thing I do is feel to see if you are definetly, undisputebly realBecause of you I am alive in my soul again and this wonderful love I again am able to feel.Love is a fleeting emotion but when its spirit bound it grows and adheres to each heartSo that the two hearts beating unite to become one in mind, body, and soul.

Whoever the Seattle Seahawks play from here out is gonna have to bring their A-Plus game!

I'm posting this for a friend....Ignorant people can be so cruel!! I'm posting this because recently I have been mocked and laughed at for things beyond my control... I have three of these illnesses as does some of my friends.... Not one of my Facebook friends will copy and paste (but I am counting on a true family member or friend to do it). If you would be there for me no matter what then copy and paste this. I'm doing this to prove a friend wrong that someone is always listening. I care. Hard to explain to someone who has no clue. It's a daily struggle being in pain or feeling sick on the inside while you look fine on the outside. Please put this as your status for at least 1 hour if you or someone you know has an invisible illness (IBS, Crohn's, PTSD,C.O.P.D., Anxiety, Arthritis, Cancer, Heart Disease, Bipolar, Depression, Diabetes, Lupus, Fibromyalgia, MS, AS, ME, , Epilepsy, hereditary angio edema , AUTISM, Borderline personality disorder, M.D.,D.D.D., CFS, Histiocytosis,O.D.D, A.D.H.D, RSD, PBC,RLS etc.) Never judge.I copied and pasted for all my friends who have one or more of these problems xox

Je suis Charlie!

For all my friends who love to watch animal cams here is one of a great horned owl that just was turned on again as she is nesting! http://www.ustream.tv/okcowlcam?utm_source=crowd-live-backend&utm_medium=visit-channel&utm_campaign=notifications

http://xfinity.comcast.net/articles/entertainment-eonline/20150102/b610800/

Ben PorterA child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."

Thank you for the birthday wishes! They are truly appreciated!

Poor forty-niners! They aren't even competitive tonight! Their injuries have told on them mightily!

I need some Idiot time desperately! Any takers?

Some thoughts as we enter the holiday season ... It is important to remember that not everyone is surrounded by large wonderful families. Some of us have problems during the holidays and sometimes are overcome with great sadness when we remember the loved ones who are not with us. And, many people have no one to spend these times with and are besieged by loneliness. We all need caring, loving thoughts right now. If I don't see your name, I'll understand. May I ask my friends wherever you might be, to kindly copy, paste, and share this status for one hour to give a moment of support to all those who have family problems, health struggles, job issues, worries of any kind and just need to know that someone cares. Do it for all of us, for nobody is immune. I hope to see this on the walls of all my friends just for moral support. I know some will! I did it for a friend and you can too! (You have to copy & paste this one, NO sharing) Be grateful, and may The Lord bless you all . .

I've had a sweet tooth all day! There is nothing sweet in this place, with one exception, can you guess what that is? lol

Happy FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

The first one is one week before it healed up! The second one was my last visit after it healed a huge difference! Now it's up to me how I take care of myself! Sometimes I struggle but the pain keeps me vigilant!

I know nobody will read my status but sometimes, when I'm bored, I get wrapped up in a sleeping bag and lather butter all over myself and slide around the kitchen floor pretending I'm a slug!

The most positive news I have had in years! I am officially released from my weekly visits to the Valley General Wound Healing Center. Last week I was terrified that something bad was going to happen and set me back another 3 months. The Dr said I have graduated to be able to be VGWHC free for six weeks. I am ecstatic and while I am exhausted I can't sleep because I am so excited! God has been extremely good to me even when the setbacks came. Those made me realize there are some things I have to be motivated about and be vigilant in taking care of business about. I lift my hands in PRAISE! Woohoo!

Just a few minutes ago at the store Maddy and I had the following conversation! Remember she is only 3! Me: Maddy are you big?Maddy: Papa I am big. Me: Is Papa big? Maddy: Oh! Yeah your big! I laughed so hard!