BigPapaDean

My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have Sex?' 'No,' she answered. I then said, 'Is that your final answer?' ... She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, 'Yes..' So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend." And that's when the fight started... ________________________________ I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the rump steak, rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?" "Nah, she can order for herself." And that's when the fight started..... _____________________________ My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked her, "Do you know him?" "Yes", she sighed, "He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since." "My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?" And then the fight started... ________________________________ When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat, making beer.. Always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway." The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp. _____________________________ My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, "What's on TV?" I said, "Dust." And then the fight started... ________________________________ Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back; now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible." My loving wife of 5 years replied, "And, can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?" And that's how the fight started... _______________________________ My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds." I bought her a bathroom scale. And then the fight started...... ______________________________ After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's License to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability too.' And then the fight started... ________________________________ My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to me, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.' I replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect." And then the fight started........ ________________________________ I rear-ended a car this morning...the start of a REALLY bad day! The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!! He looked up at me and said 'I am NOT Happy!' So I said, 'Well, which one ARE you then?' That's how the fight started. ________________________________ One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift... The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fight started.

Okay, I fixed it the first time but it's doing it again. Everything is on manual so I have no idea what the problem is this time. Maybe I should put it back on automatic download. Any suggestions?

Hmmm, and ya'll still think me crazy! lol The other day I was thinking how simple and easy things were to work on before all the new fancy doodads. Yeah right! P Dizzle just a personal question. Did ya or did you not update yer own personal driver?

@Budman one of the post you said you thought I was running it on auto. That made me go open that place and log in and then I saw sure enough. Then I changed it to manual and now it's fixed. Thanks guys.

When it says to log in at a certain place is the user and password that are already there the correct ones or what?

I received a pm from this guy and all it said was "go". I replied Go where? lol

That's better than none. Thank you bro.

It's going to be a while before I will have any funds for buying a pad. That is why I asked. All but a very small amount I get goes to the Assisted Living facility I am in. That little bit left over buys my daily care needs. Looks like I have to wait.

I have been trying to get here on the site to see if anyone can help me? My mouse pad finally was eaten by the worn out cat. It was a larger one than normal but for a few more months I will not be able to buy one to use. The size of the one that wore out was 12 x 36 inches. Now it doesn't have to be that big but the bigger it is the better for an old man with bad hands to control his mouse. If you have anything close or even used as long as it is still useable I would be ever so grateful! Send me a pm and I will get you the address! Thank you so much for helping an old worn out knifer out in his.... (who am I kidding)? lol

My memory is really bad and I can't remember the simple little things. I use to just take for granted these days is a task. @Budman my card is GTX 760

Okay, Budman, I want to say thanks a million but this may a bit over my pay grade. I went and tried to do it per these instructions and ran into so probs that I am not too sure about. I need some professional help from your pay grade. When can I get in contact with you or someone to assist me with this procedure? Any help will be very much appreciated.

Ever since Nvidia put out the Geforce experience I have used it. It's always been dependable and kept me updated with the drivers I needed. This latest tho when I go to install the most recent driver I get this message. So I tried restarting and that failed as well. I then uninstalled it and reinstalled it but I still get the same message. Just wondering has anyone else had this problem and what did they do about it or am I just the weird odd man out here and so Beer can have a laugh, what the hell am I doing here?

Oh, Pete, I don't know about that! He has angels singing and trumpets playing as we sit here reading this. Lol!

And ya'll think I'm crazy! lol

I received his pm also and lately, there have been a plethora of people I know who have been stricken with this horrid disease. Pfzrzie please stay strong and BEAT this thing! Many prayers and loves coming your way!

I turned 7. Then I couldn't wait until I turned 14. Then came the ultimate age of 21 that I just had to be. Now 40+ yrs later I wish I was still 21. I was a kid who loved the limelight and any chance I had I took it. I didn't consider the embarrassment to my parents. I just knew I had to be seen. When I grew older I was the life of the party no matter where I was. I hated boring stupid inactive parties. Tho I never drank or did anything like that I was always on a natural high, you might say. I use to see myself at 40-50 and think I will be successful and be set for life. I was very active in my church and when some activity needed something done to kick it off I wouldn't hesitate. I was married at the OLD age of 27 and my social life came to a screeching halt. All the activities I loved on a daily basis such as hunting, fishing and hiking seemed to just vanish out the door. I raised 3 kids with the wife and then when I least expected it my life changed again. On the day of our 28th yr anniversary, she left me and turn gay on me. Not that that is so bad but imagine how I as a man felt. That and a few other things brought me to a place I never in my wildest dreams ever thought I would be. I had a nervous breakdown. One which totally changed my personality to something entirely different from what I knew. Though I also lost all my longterm memory so I really had no standards to measure myself by anyway. This forced me to quit my job of being an office manager of a steel sales center as the stress caused me to have relapses at work. The boss was willing to keep me and have me go to get treatment. I remember thinking I need a total change so I quit. I decided to go to school to get a degree in cyberforensics. The interesting thing about that is I couldn't retain anything I learned. Today I have an 8K educational loan hanging over me that I can't pay. I am now in an Assisted Living facility with no funds left for paying that loan off. I sit here day after day on my pc because the big strong man I was is now a fat flabby handicapped man that can barely walk. My life has changed in so many ways I could have never foreseen that I just shake my head. Yes, it's been a tough journey but I am still among the living and I have 2 grandkids that make my heart go pitter patter. This day is my oldest one's birthday but I won't get to see her as much as I would love too. My purpose for this post is so those of you who knew me before so you can be reacquainted with me again.

I don't pot much anymore because there are so many new members that I simply don't know. I am not complaining but for me to feel comfortable I need some sort of connection with most.

My family has put many of the old family movies we have on cd. I have it stored on my desktop. These movies go way back before I was even born. That was prehistoric I know, but as the caption says I do have a question. DIs there a program that's free that I can edit part of it out for my kids? I use to be able to do it with ms video but that no longer exist(so I am told) what can I use now?

UPDATE!!! When I got this mouse it didn't show in the program so I just figured(I am a redneck) that it didn't need it to use so I being as I am just left it. Well, this morning I thought there could be an update I haven't seen. I checked and sure enough, there was and I installed it and guess what. I still did show! lol Yeah, I can disable the scroll button but after all this why should I? I just got more stubborn than I was earlier!

Oh yeah, I checked and yes it is a G602 wireless gaming mouse.

Thanks for all the suggestions, but it's a wireless mouse and the software won't even acknowledge it's presence. It works just fine other than the fact that it is so sensitive and I can't always feel myself clicking the wheel as I scroll. That's what neuropathy does to a guy! (or gal) lol

Hmmm maybe you're right. Maybe you should stop while you're ahead! lol

Thing is I already have that installed and it won't recognize it as needing the software. Now what?

I have a G602 that uses no program from Logitech. I use that scroll way too much as my hands have neuropathy and most days I can't feel them very well. Then when all these multi tabs begin showing up a friend of mine suggested it might be the scroll button that is very sensitive. I thought I would turn that off and see if it stopped the problem. Up yours Beers! lol

Lately I posted I was having probs with multiple tabs opening as I scrolled. I figured out my scroll wheel on my mouse is so sensitive it will click as I scroll. This means as I scroll I inadvertently open tabs. I need to know how I can turn that part of my mouse off. Just so the scroll doesn't click. Thank you for your time! Oh @2ManyBeers up yours! lol