TBB

An ex >IDIOT<

NICE! Will you actually use it??

Bill Gates is hanging out with the chairman of General Motors. "If automotive technology had kept pace with computer technology over the past few decades," boasts Gates, "you would now be driving a V-32 instead of a V-8, and it would have a top speed of 10,000 miles per hour. Or, you could have an economy car that weighs 30 pounds and gets a thousand miles to a gallon of gas. In either case, the sticker price of a new car would be less than $50." "Sure," says the GM chairman. "But would you really want to drive a car that crashes four times a day?" A young Programmer and his Project Manager board a train headed through the mountains on its way to Wichita. They can find no place to sit except for two seats right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother. After a while, it is obvious that the young woman and the young programmer are interested in each other, because they are giving each other looks. Soon the train passes into a tunnel and it is pitch black. There is a sound of a kiss followed by the sound of a slap. When the train emerges from the tunnel, the four sit there without saying a word. The grandmother is thinking to herself, "It was very brash for that young man to kiss my granddaughter, but I'm glad she slapped him." The Project manager is sitting there thinking, "I didn't know the young tech was brave enough to kiss the girl, but I sure wish she hadn't missed him when she slapped me!" The young woman was sitting and thinking, "I'm glad the guy kissed me, but I wish my grandmother had not slapped him!" The young programmer sat there with a satisfied smile on his face. He thought to himself, "Life is good. How often does a guy have the chance to kiss a beautiful girl and slap his Project manager all at the same time!" Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asked a young Engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?" The Engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The interviewer inquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years say, a red Corvette?" The Engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?" And the interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it." There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "Great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages. A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen". The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them". Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now". Daddy, how was I born? Ah, very well, one day you need to find out anyway! Mom and Dad got together in a chat room. Dad set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber cafe. We snuck into a secluded room, and then your mother downloaded from your dad's memory stick. As soon as dad was ready for an upload, it was discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall. Since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later the blessed virus appeared. And that's the story.

Have a GREAT birthday!!!

DON'T save your credit card on any shopping site!! I enter it each time I need to - a little more work but well worth the effort - unless you want to be an >IDIOT<

WELCOME to the >IDIOT< House.

Welcome to the Forums

Sounds like the B-man uses!!!

@BUDMAN STOP watching me with your binocs - pervert!!!!!

NICE!! I watched the whole vid - thanks

Have a GREAT birthday!!!

Clearly he's an >IDIOT< who is lost and looking for other >IDIOTS< to tell him where he is

Have a GREAT birthday!!!

FANTASTIC - but you >IDIOT< I'm hungry again!!!

Hope the drains aren't clogged

And you found him why?? He was supposed to stay lost!!!

Headspace? Headspace?? Headspace??? You saying my head is full of space????

Doesn't everybody do that????

Maybe if you stopped watching gay naked porn starring @Joe Canadian your bill would go down even more!!!!

Thoughts - good vibes out your way to Dad and your family

Have a GREAT birthday!!!

Me too!!!!!

Notice you're a bit of a BUTTman

No - you think I'm an >IDIOT< - I have a subscription via Amazon - truck load every other week

I was a freshman in college when he was shot. At recess in kindergarten would go outside and play with the dinosaurs