LtLaszlo Posted January 23, 2011 Member ID: 151 Group: ++ COD2 Admin Followers: 62 Topic Count: 190 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 9241 Content Per Day: 1.60 Reputation: 24525 Achievement Points: 95621 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 323 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: Yesterday at 03:26 AM Birthday: 05/17/1959 Device: Kindle Fire Posted January 23, 2011 Top Four Adult Jokes of the decade Fourth Place: A man bumps into a woman in a hotel lobby and as he does, His elbow goes into her breast. They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and says, 'Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me.' She replies, 'If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 221..' ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts rubbing his wife's arm. The wife turns over and says 'I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh.' The husband, rejected, turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again. 'Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?' ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Runner Up: Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed there for a number of years when he came home one day To confess to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer. His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk about it, but Bill said he would be too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own. One day a few weeks later, Bill came home and his wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong. 'What's wrong, Bill?' she asked. 'Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer?' 'Oh, Bill, you didn't' she exclaimed. 'Yes, I did.' he replied. 'My God, Bill, what happened?' 'I got fired.' 'No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?' 'Oh...she got fired too.' ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Third Place : A couple had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the wife says, 'Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together.' 'I know,' the old man said. 'We were probably sitting here naked as a jaybird fifty years ago..' 'Well,' Granny snickered. 'Let's relive some old times..' Where upon, the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table. 'You know, honey,' the little old lady breathlessly replied, 'My nipples are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago.' 'I wouldn't be surprised,' replied Gramps. 'One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal =============================================== Winner: = Awards
Ov3rKi11 Posted January 23, 2011 Member ID: 265 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 41 Topic Count: 36 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 689 Content Per Day: 0.12 Reputation: 423 Achievement Points: 25220 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/06/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: June 24 Birthday: 05/22/1969 Device: iPhone Posted January 23, 2011 ALL of them a funny as hell...LOL...LOL... Awards
Half-A-100 Posted January 26, 2011 Member ID: 600 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 15 Topic Count: 16 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 125 Content Per Day: 0.02 Reputation: 14 Achievement Points: 840 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/20/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: June 24 Birthday: 01/25/1958 Device: Windows Posted January 26, 2011 Been married for thirty -I can see that coming Awards
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