TBB Posted January 17, 2022 Member ID: 989 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 25 Topic Count: 266 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 18153 Content Per Day: 3.47 Reputation: 20183 Achievement Points: 133042 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 265 Joined: 01/07/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 14 hours ago Birthday: 01/27/1946 Device: Windows Share Posted January 17, 2022 A young man was showing off his new sports car to his girlfriend. She was thrilled at the speed. "If I do 200mph, will you take off your clothes?" he asked. "Yes!" said his adventurous girlfriend. And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off all her clothes. Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car skidded onto some gravel and flipped over. The naked girl was thrown clear, but he was jammed beneath the steering wheel. "Go and get help!" he cried. "But I can't. I'm naked and my clothes are gone!" "Take my shoe", he said, "and cover yourself." Holding the shoe over her pubes, the girl ran down the road and found a service station. Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station proprietor, "Please help me! My boyfriend's stuck!" The proprietor looked at the shoe and said, "There's nothing I can do...he's in too far." One morning while his wife was making breakfast, a man walked up to her and gave her a healthy pinch on her butt. He said to her, "If you firmed up your butt we could get rid of your girdle." The wife was angry but said nothing. The next morning her husband pinched her breast and said, "If you firmed these up we could get rid of your bra." The wife grabbed her husband's penis and replied, "and if you firmed this up we could get rid of the mailman, the gardener, the pool man, and your brother!" A little boy walks into his parents' room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. The mom sees her son and quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has seen. She dresses quickly and goes to find him. The son sees his mom and asks, "What were you and Dad doing?" The mother replies, "Well you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it to help flatten it." "You're wasting your time," said the boy. "Why is that?" asked his mom, puzzled. "Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on her knees and blows it right back up." Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?" His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not." TheLastColdBeer, KaptCrunch and major-mark63 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
KaptCrunch Posted January 17, 2022 Member ID: 389 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 45 Topic Count: 296 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 4473 Content Per Day: 0.84 Reputation: 3636 Achievement Points: 36540 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 40 Joined: 09/14/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 5 hours ago Birthday: 01/01/1970 Device: Windows Share Posted January 17, 2022 TBB why do womens breast have goose bumps around the nipple....... so the blind can read it ...........lick here TheLastColdBeer, major-mark63 and TBB 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Recommended Posts