Leaderboard

A man and his wife were sound asleep when they were woken by a loud banging on their front door. "Who the f..k is that?" the man groans. "I do't know" says the wife, "Why don't you get up and find out?" The man gets up, opens the window, it's pissing down with rain, and see's a guy standing at the door, freezing cold with his hand's in his pockets and collar pulled up. " What the f..k do you want at this time of night?" the man shouts. "I need a push!" says the guy looking up "F..k off!" says the man and slams the window shut He gets back in bed and his wife asks him what was going on. "There was some guy at the front door wanting a push, so I told him to f..k off" says the man "That was a bit harsh" says his wife, "Don't you remember last week when we broke down and, if it wasn't for that really helpful man coming to our aid, we would have been stuck right out in the country all night!" "Go out and help him, he may be desperate" The guy groans, drags himself out of bed, and go's downstairs to the front door, he pulls on his waterproof coat and wellie's and go's outside in the appalling weather. "Ok, I'm here to give you a push, Where are you?" he shouts "Over here, on the swing" the guy shouts back.

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door. Later, a policeman comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you , I'm doing community service this week.' The policeman was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door. Then a Politician came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I can not accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Politician was very happy and left the shop. The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Politicians lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of a country and the politicians who run it.

XtremeIdiots would like to wish all members celebrating their birthday today a happy birthday. Eclipse (60)

How autumnal?? roasting your nuts on a fire

With all the heated accessories available I think you can be warmer on your bike than in your home!! I tried my heated seat once. It felt as though I was going to have an accident in my pants!!

even heated hand grips for us Canadians

Heated seats??? oh my God how bikers have changed?? they'll be getting nail extensions next ??

Unfortunately so TRUE!!

Just installed.... Steam ID: 76561197991652372