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AusiGirl

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Posts posted by AusiGirl

    cane toad daz!

    in Jokes and Misc stuff

    Posted · Edited by AussieGirl

    <div id="fb-root"></div> <script>(function(d, s, id) { var js, fjs = d.getElementsByTagName(s)[0]; if (d.getElementById(id)) return; js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; js.src = "//connect.facebook.net/en_US/all.js#xfbml=1"; fjs.parentNode.insertBefore(js, fjs); }(document, 'script', 'facebook-jssdk'));</script>
    <div class="fb-post" data-href="https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=490723489520" data-width="466"><div class="fb-xfbml-parse-ignore"><a

    little johnny

    in Jokes and Misc stuff

    Posted · Edited by AussieGirl

    Little Johnny goes to school, and the teacher says, 'Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?'

    Little Johnny waves his hand, 'Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!'

    Miss Rogers:'All right, little Johnny, what is your multi-syllable word?'

    Little Johnny says, 'Mas-tur-bate.'

    Miss Rogers smiles and says, 'Wow, little Johnny, that's a mouthful.'

    Little Johnny says, 'No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob"

     

     

    Little Johnny sees his Daddy's car passing the playground and going into the woods.

    Curious, he follows the car and sees Daddy and Aunt Jane kissing.

    Johnny finds this so exciting and can barely contain himself as he runs home and starts to tell his mother excitedly.

    "MOMMY, MOMMY, I WAS AT THE PLAYGROUND AND DADDY AND...."

    Mommy tells him to slow down, but that she wants to hear the story.

    So Johnny tells her. "I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went to look and Daddy was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped her take off her shirt, then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane laid down on the seat, then Daddy...."

    At this point, Mommy cut him off and said, "Johnny, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save the rest of it for supper time. I want to see the look on Daddy's face when you tell it tonight."

    At the dinner table, Mommy asks Johnny to tell his story.

    He describes the car into the woods, the undressing, laying down on the seat, and, "Then Daddy and Aunt Jane did that same thing Mommy and Uncle Jeff used to do when Daddy was in the Army."

    .

    One day the teacher walked to the back of the room where Johnny was, and he had his hand down his pants.

    The Teacher asked, "Johnny, what are you doing?"

    Then, Johnny said, "It hurts down there."

    "Well then, you need to go to the nurse and see if you can go home", said the teacher.

    A little while later, Johnny came back to classroom and sat back down.

    Then the teacher came to the back of the room again, and he had his dick haging out of his pants.

    The teacher said, "Johnny, what's that doing hanging out of your pants?!"

    Then Johnny said, "My mommy said if I can stick it out until noon, she'll come and pick me up."

    a man takes his wife to stock show

    in Jokes and Misc stuff

    Posted

    A man takes his wife to the stock show. They start heading down the alley that had the bulls. They come up to the first bull and his sign stated: "This bull mated 50 times last year." The wife turns to her husband and says, "He mated 50 times in a year, you could learn from him." They proceed to the next bull and his sign stated: "This bull mated 65 times last year." The wife turns to her husband and says, "This one mated 65 times last year. That is over 5 times a month. You can learn from this one, also." They proceeded to the last bull and his sign said: "This bull mated 365 times last year." The wife's mouth drops open and says, "WOW! He mated 365 times last year. That is ONCE A DAY!!! You could really learn from this one." The man turns to his wife and says, "Go up and inquire if it was 365 times with the same cow."

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