owens Posted May 17, 2011 Member ID: 1920 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 6 Topic Count: 29 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 77 Content Per Day: 0.02 Reputation: 1 Achievement Points: 716 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/24/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: December 6, 2018 Share Posted May 17, 2011 A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room, took the husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your wife at all.' 'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and really good with the kids.' ---------------------------------- An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you.' The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you man and wife.' ----------------------------------- While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice. 'What do you think?' I asked.. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?' 'Better get a bikini,' he replied 'You'd never get it all in one.' He's still in intensive care. ----------------------------------- And, my favorite is: The graveside service just barely finished, when there was a massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance. The little old man looked at the preacher and calmly said, 'Well......she's there.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Merlin007 Posted May 17, 2011 Member ID: 2068 Group: +++ COD5 Head Admin Followers: 69 Topic Count: 1079 Topics Per Day: 0.22 Content Count: 8460 Content Per Day: 1.72 Reputation: 7349 Achievement Points: 75204 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 64 Joined: 12/25/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 7 hours ago Birthday: 05/23/1973 Device: Windows Share Posted May 17, 2011 LMAO. Good ones Owens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
TBB Posted May 17, 2011 Member ID: 989 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 25 Topic Count: 274 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 18334 Content Per Day: 3.48 Reputation: 20392 Achievement Points: 134317 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 274 Joined: 01/07/10 Status: Online Last Seen: 11 minutes ago Birthday: 01/27/1946 Device: Windows Share Posted May 17, 2011 Thanks - some god ones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
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