SHADOOW

well i thought everyone that are hardcore fans, your little running duck better known as SHADOW is back. let the killings begin......

grandpa and his grandson were out in the middle of the lake fishing, they're having a grand old time together. about 10 o'clock rolls around and grandpa reaches into is lunch bag and pulls out a beer, grandson looks and asks grandpa, ( Grandpa can i have a sip of your beer?) Grandpa looks at his Grand son and asks him, ( well i don't know can your penis touch your bunghole?) the little boy says no Grandpa replies (WELL THEN I GUESS YOU CAN"T HAVE A SIP OF MY BEER THEN.) so they continue on fishing, 11 o'clock rolls around and Grandpa reaches into his lunch bag again and pulls out a marijuana cigarette, the little boy looks and asks, (grandpa can i have a toke off of your cigaretee?) Grandpa looks at his grandson and says, (well i don't know, can your penis touch your bunghole?) the little boy says no Grandpa replies (WELL THEN I GUESS YOU CAN"T HAVE A TOKE OFF MY CIGARETTE THEN.) again they go back to fishing. noon time rolls around and the little boy opens up his lunch box and pulls out a bag of cookies. Grandpa loos and asks ( what do you have in your hands?) the little boy replies ( a bag of cookies.) Grandpa looks at him smacking his lips together and asks (can i have one of those cookies?) the little boy goes, ( i don't know Grandpa can your penis touch your bunghole?) Grandpa spoke up and says ( WHY YES IT CAN.....) the little boy replies (good go fuck yourself because these are myyyy cookies.)

i like that , that's a good one, got a chuckle out of me.

i hope you enjoy this one, it is really funny. go george carlin. OMG, THIS IS TO FUNNY!!! GEORGE CARLIN, ON REVERSING LIFE'S SEQUENCE . I luv this idea !!! I want to live my next life backwards: You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in a nursing home feeling better every day. Then you get kicked out for being too healthy. You enjoy your retirement and collect your pension. Then, when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work 40 years until you're too young to work. You get ready for High School: drink alcohol, party, and you're generally promiscuous. Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, and you have no responsibilities. Then you become a baby, and then... You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in spa-like conditions: central heating, room service on tap, and then... You finish off as an orgasm. I rest my case.

have a safe trip hauptman, you will be very much missed, take care over there and return as soon as possible. later my friend. SHADOW

that was a good one.

yeah i found this really funny, almost as good as ( i don't feel like it ) that one was really funny.

this is funny SEX AFTER DEATH A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there is sex after death. Their biggest fear was that there was no afterlife at all. After a long life together, the husband was the first to die. True to his word, he made the first contact: "Marion...Marion..." "Is that you, Bob?" "Yes, I've come back like we agreed." "That's wonderful! What's it like?" "Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it's off to the golf course. I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times. Then I have lunch (you'd be proud - lots of greens). Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it's back to golf course again. Then it's more sex until late at night. I catch some much needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again" "Oh, Bob are you in Heaven?" "No...I'm a rabbit in Arizona!"

that was so funny, rotflmao. that's a good one

i thought all of you might like this one. i'm a woman and i laughed my butt off. nothing like slam take that. glad you enjoyed it as much as i did. it was just too funny to keep to myself had to share with my XI site friends.

have yourself a most wonderful time purpleronnie. SHADOW_XI (hardcore)

this is a must read, i laughed my butt off at this one. a friend e-mailed it to me so i just had to share with the idiots. enjoy everyone. When girls don't put out!! This was written by a guy ... it's pretty damn smart. Girls -- Please have a sense of humor! I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.' I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!' So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... 'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.' She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?' Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.' We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.' I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.' Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?' I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.' And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?' Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.

thank you very much for the help on fixing my screw up. still laughing over it. and i got the e-mail of the ones you took off, thank you

well thank you, but i haven't figured out how to get that one off yet so now i'm stuck with all 3. hahahahaha it's too funny, still laughing my butt off over this one

love it thank you shadowlady

that is so messed up. but funny to hear a preacher try and explain what goes on with homosexuals. WOW

last one standing

happy birtday everyone, have yourselves a blast

omg, that is so funny. and no we don't use saddles

which shadow? there's shadowlady and then there's shadowdreamers (AKA SHADOW_XI in the hardcore server ).

those are funny

happy birthday everyone

thank you for the info

that was so flippen funny.

omg, that was prety funny. if that was a shoe sale, then i'm queen elizabeth ( not hahahahahahahahaha )