BUDMAN

Tongues are 5 inches from your mouth to the back of your throat. 
 
Just sayin'

Dollar bills can be folded at least 8,000 times, which is 20x more than a normal sheet of paper  
That’s because dollar bills are made of a special 75% cotton and 25% linen blend, patented by Crane & Co.

Looks like we have a sniper in the Thread. Can someone provide cover fire so we can get the FACTS out?

The fact is..... Break Fluid works better at breaking down rusty bolts and nuts, more than anything. Put on let it sit and enjoy a nut before removing the nut. 

If you want to preserve a untreated wood post in the ground using concrete.... burn the end nice and dark before putting in the concrete. It neutralize the electrolysis which will rot the wood.

For guys with a penis and real balls...  the 100% way to avoid pissing on the toilet is to piss outside. Works every time. Plus you get to be primal and mark your territory like a badass.  I haven't pissed in a toilet in  exactly 4 years on May 1st.... freaking 2 days. Trust me I have pissed everywhere else. 
 

Dollar bills can be folded at least 8,000 times, which is 20x more than a normal sheet of paper  
That’s because dollar bills are made of a special 75% cotton and 25% linen blend, patented by Crane & Co.

Found some good ones. Not mine of course but funny.
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's Secret.  
Chuck Norris once made fire by rubbing two ice cubes.  
When Chuck Norris needs to relax, he joins the army.  
Chuck Norris once made Kirsten Stewart smile.  
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. And got one.  
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.  
Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi trucks gas tank for fun that truck is now known as Optimus Prime  
Chuck Norris killed 50 bad guys with 2 bullets. The first bullet was a warning shot.
  Jesus can walk on water, but only Chuck Norris can swim through land.

Very nice... you have god like blood in you. 

When Chuck Norris does pushups the Earth moves. 
When Chuck Norris speaks, even Hellen Keller listens.
When God was creating the heavens and Earth, he consulted Chuck Norris first. 
When Chuck Norris dies he'll go heaven and tell Jesus how he did on Earth then take over for forgiving us of our sins. 
When Chuck Norris observes the Double Slit Theory experiment, all the partials disappear and hide. 
When Chuck Norris decided to attend a Ditty after hours party uninvited, Ditty left the country without saying goodbye.
Chuck Norris's pronouns are, "God Like" "Master" "Queasy Lord" "Simi-Perfect" and he expects you to use them.
 

Beavers fart

I think that is as good as it's going to get with what I have to work with. Thanks for everyone's help. 

Budman
have heard of RadTools,  is Bink engine  that the CoD engine is made from. i use it and seems to me a sharper and crisp picture    

Brandon put a tater in his shorts at college to impress the girls. They ran from him. One dude took pity and explained "you have to put the potato in the front."

Liberals? Liberals??  We don't need no stinkin Liberals   (treasure of The Siera Madre)

as @BUDMAN would say, "just saying". hahahaha

Sorry to hear this mate.
My wife is near the end of her treatments now and all I can say is stay strong and be there for her when she needs it.
The treatments aren't pleasant and the overall experience is very unpleasant,  which in turn affects emotions and mental well being. 
If you need any advice or just someone to talk to then give me a shout.
In the meantime my thoughts and positive vibes are with you

Yesterday I took my wife for pre booked tests at the hospital. And after having an Endoscopy and Colonoscopy the Doctors discovered my wife has Bowel Cancer.
At the moment we are just numb and trying to get our heads round it, Donna is a woman who has never smoked or drank to excess (the odd glass of wine) and teaches PE at school. So she has always been fit and healthy. And in ten years has only been off work twice due to illness it just makes no sense.
We have now told all the family which has been very hard on everyone. This woman is my rock for over 22 years we have only ever been apart 3 times in all those years. I find myself having to be the strong one telling everyone its alright mum will be fine, while cracking jokes and keeping a smile on my face when in reality I just want to scream. 
It is now a waiting game for more tests and the results from the Biopsy. We have a full body CT scan booked for the 4th of next month to see if it has spread and only after those results will the Doctors decide the next step.
I do not claim to be a religeous man but I prayed for the first time in a lot of years. Not for me but for my wife who is the most wonderfull kind and gentle woman you could ever wish to meet.
I only post this to remind everyone, hug the special people in your life , tell them you love them today. Because you never know what tomorrow brings.
Wishing everyone the best
 Baldie (Rob) 

Sorry to hear this baldie, positive thoughts for you and your family.

# 1 - it's a joke
# 2 - no one is forcing you to look at this thread

Is that a new herd of fly over teh moon cows ? I've heard they are by far teh worse for them trails of CON.
 

Brunch was invented as a way of curing hangovers.
This meal would be enjoyed as a late breakfast that leans more towards fatty foods. This came from the belief that alcohol causes cravings for greasy food to increase. 

Buttermilk does not contain any butter.
The butter in its name refers to the origins of the drink. Now that’s a confusing random fact you probably didn’t know.  

Honey never spoils. Archeologists have found honey in tombs dating as far back as ancient Egypt where honey was still very edible. 

hey @BigPapaDean, I know I can help you fix this. Ive done it a few times with CoD on Steam.  It would be so much easier to talk you through it on voice. Ive got you on fb so shoot me a message so we can get together and get you back on the battlefield. Carl Sexton on fb
P.S
I will say this,
Step: 1 - You need someone else who is already on the version you want. Step: 2 - They need to send you their WaW game .exe from their Steam games folder.
Step: 3 - Then you save it IN PLACE OF your current WaW .exe file inside your Steam games folder. 
Step: 4 - Change Steam Updates setting to ask before it updates. Turn off automatic updates. NEVER VERIFY INTEGRITY OF GAME FILES. It will send you back to current updated version.
Step: 5 - Start your game. It will tell you the version you are on in bottom right corner of Main Menu. Good luck, hope it works and shoot me a message on fb.

Now why would you do that Penis head... lol

A woodpeckers tongue  actually wraps all the way around it's brain to protect it when it's doing all that hammering. 

Happy Birthday Everyone  
Oh, and you too fcker @Crack