MTNMAN52

Good one Johnny

I NOW MANY OF YOU (LIKE ME) ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO FOOTBALL SEASON. WELL, HERE'S A LITTLE RECAP OF LAST YEAR......... Coincidence?? Just wondering! Alabama beat Arkansas and they fired the coach. Alabama beat Tennessee and they fired the coach. Alabama beat Auburn and they fired the coach. Then Alabama beat Notre Dame and the Pope resigns... Damn, I wish the White House had a team.

In the not too distant future, YouTube, Twitter & Facebook will merge to form one giant, idiotic, super time wasting website called...

This is the answering machine message at the Maroochydore High School in Queensland, Australia. click on à http://www.youtube.com/embed/Pwghabw4N80?rel=0

Holly Crap Bat Man

Yea Happy B-Day Google, and Many More...

Hellmann's Mayonnaise - a bit of history Most people don't know that back in 1912, Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England. In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York . This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico. But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York. The ship hit an iceberg and sank. The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were extremely heartbroken at the loss. Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning. The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as - Sinko De Mayo. WHAT ??? You expected something educational from me? You need a shot of Tequila .

Happy Birthday Ping and I wish you many more Happy Healthy Years

Funny http://vimeo.com/14759010

An elderly couple Pauline & Frank were recently attending a church service at their retirement village. About halfway through the service, Pauline took a pen and paper out of her purse, and wrote a note and handed it to Frank. The note said: "I just let out a silent fart, what do you think I should do?" Frank scribbled back: "Put a new battery in your hearing aid."

Having already downed a few power drinks, she turns around, faces him, looks him straight in the eye and says, "Listen here, good looking. I will screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, their place, my place, in the car, front door, back door, on the ground, standing up, sitting down, naked or with clothes on... It doesn't matter to me. I just love it." His eyes now wide with interest, he responds, "No kidding... I'm in Congress too. What state do you represent?"

Funny Be sure to watch all three commercials! http://www.bitoffun.com/video_vault/white-only-humor.htm

The difference between the Supreme Court and the Ku Klux Klan is that the members of the Supreme Court dress in black robes and scare white people......

https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/10304_225160677612442_951272267_n.jpg

This is one lucky Guy http://www.grindtv.com/outdoor/excursions/post/huge-shark-gives-kayak-angler-a-major-surprise/

Click on the Date and Time Dec 19, 2012 11:22pm

They Probably Wer't Activated....LOL

One guy says to his buddy: what is a dilemma? The buddy replied: well, there's nothing better than an example to illustrate that. Imagine that you are laying in a big bed with a beautiful young woman on one side and a gay man on the other. All of you are naked. Who are you going to turn your back on?

On the morning Daylight Savings Time ended, I stopped in to visit an aging friend. He was busy covering his penis with black shoe polish.... I said to him, "You dumb shit! - You're supposed to turn your clock back".

So sorry Pete my Prayers are with you and your family....

Two rednecks are sitting on the front porch. e One says, "Did you know that elks have sex 10 to 15 times a night?" "Aw crap..," says his friend. "I just joined the VFW!"

I'd just come out of the shop with a roast beef sandwich, large chips, ear of corn & a jumbo sausage. A poor homeless man sat there and said 'I've not eaten for two days.' I told him, 'I wish I had your will power.' >> >> >> I took my Biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name two things >> commonly found in cells. Apparently "Blacks" and "Mexicans" were NOT >> the correct answers. >> >> >> A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunchtime. She said 'sorry about >> the wait'. I said, 'Don't worry, you'll find a way to lose it eventually'. >> >> I walked past a black kid sitting at a bus stop as I went into the >> bank. When I came out, he looked at me and said 'Any Change?' I said 'Nope, you're still black'. >> Snow in the forecast and the TV weather gal said she was expecting 8 inches tonight. I thought to myself, 'fat chance', with a face like that! >> >> >> A 10-year Old Irish boy stands crying at the side of the road. A man >> passing by asks 'What's wrong, lad?' The boy says 'Me ma died this >> morning.' 'Oh bejaysus,' The man says. 'Do you want me to call Father >> O'Riley for you?' The boy replies, 'No tanks mister, sex is the last >> ting on my mind at the moment.' >> >> >> Years ago it was suggested that an apple a day kept the doctor away. >> But since all the doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon >> sandwich works best! >> >> Japanese scientists have now created a camera with such a fantastic >> shutter speed that it is now possible to take a photograph of a woman >> with her mouth closed. >> >> I hate all this terrorist business. I used to love the days when you >> could look at an unattended bag on a train or bus and think to yourself. I'm going to take that.' >> >> >> Man in a hot air balloon is lost over Iowa. He looks down and sees a >> farmer in the fields and shouts to him, where am I? The farmer looks >> back up and shouts back. You're in a basket you dumb shit! >> >> >> I had a big lead in a trivia competition at a local bar until the last >> question which I got wrong. The question was where do women have the >> curliest hair? Fiji was the correct answer...hell, how did I know they >> wanted the name of a country? >> >> >> I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone >> off is a piece of cake.