DEEJAYKEG

The Mexican maid asked for a pay increase. The wife was very upset about this, and decided to talk to her about the raise. She asked: "Now Maria, why do you want a pay increase?" Maria: "Well, Señora, there are tree reasons why I wanna increaze." "The first is that I iron better than you." Wife: "Who said you iron better than me?" Maria: "Jor huzban he say so." Wife: "Oh yeah?" Maria: "The second reason eez that I am a better cook than you." Wife: "Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?" Maria: "Jor hozban did." Wife, increasingly agitated: "Oh he did, did he?" Maria: "The third reason is that I am better at sex than you in the bed." Wife, really boiling now and through gritted teeth. Wife: "And did my husband say that as well?" Maria: "No Señora...."The gardener did." Wife: "So, how much do you want?"

Translation required of the word: BILYAT!

LMAO! :hrhr: @@Ricko

Just bought Ministry of Sound 80s Groove Volume III on MP3 to entertain us on the boat. It's full of stuff from my "disco era" like this: http://youtu.be/T25m9TQ03N8

Ten reasons why golf is better than sex. #10... A below par performance is considered damn good. #09... You can stop in the middle and have a cheeseburger and a couple of beers. #08... It's much easier to find the sweet spot. #07... Foursomes are encouraged. #06... You can still make money doing it as a senior. #05... Three times a day is possible. #04... Your partner doesn't hire a lawyer if you play with someone else. #03... If you live in Florida , you can do it almost every day. #02... You don't have to cuddle with your partner when you're finished. And the NUMBER ONE reason why golf is better than sex..... #01... When your equipment gets old you can replace it!

Every success with the studies! When one is grown up and has clear goals in sight, motivation is rarely a problem plus one gets to choose what one studies. I enrolled in some Open University (OU) courses when I was still working, gaining a Certificate in Humanities and completing a year of Diploma course in English Language Studies but my employer was not helpful in any way and the shift-working and events in family life made carrying on impossible. I found the fees from my own pocket. After retirement, I returned to the OU to research resumption but the new policies on fees and student loans (for which I would not qualify) meant I'd have to find nearly four times as much per year to do another course. I'm watching the distance learning scene, however, as several universities in both the UK and the USA are now beginning to offer that at less cost to the student.

Thanks, 'Beers!

Thanks, Beers. We won't be seeing mp_omcbrest_ffa for a while and that is pleasing!

http://youtu.be/FKCnHWas3HQ http://youtu.be/byVP_M-UH_c

http://youtu.be/pyj2qL-bQ4E http://youtu.be/5MOH7vUKIjE

Just searched for MattRach MP3s... Oh boy, this could be expensive... Cheers Olive!

C'est magnifique!

Bloody 'ell, Mark'! Do you think his liver is that good?!

Have a good one, Bro'!

Thanks for sharing. Interesting TV programme and I had read of some of the cases already (e.g. unpasteurised milk). I can't really make much more of a comment as I wouldn't want this propelled into the Politics forum where people couldn't see it. All I will advise is that, if you visit the UK, do not die in Parliament as your corpse may end up in jail (yes, it is a crime to die in Parliament!). I'll leave you with a commercial running on our TV here for HSBC - one of our major banks (Hong Kong Shanghai Banking Corp) and hope the little girl had a permit...

Maybe Olive will put me out of my misery and identify that music... (s'il te plait?)

Did anyone else spot the classic Ford Capri?

Excellent photographs and video, as usual, Olive! Pleased you enjoyed your visit to England's oldest ally (since 1373, treaty ratified 1386 and still in force today). We have family there (Algarve) but have yet to visit.

Apple blocks Java on the Mac over security concerns "It's been a rough couple of weeks for Java. Security issues are dogging the code, the latest fix may cause almost as many problems as it solves, and now Apple has decided to block Java completely. French blog MacGeneration originally picked up the blockade, noticing that an update to Apple's XProtect now blocks all versions of Java on OS X 10.6 (aka Snow Leopard) and above, the second time in two weeks Apple has blocked Oracle's code." http://www.theregister.co.uk/2013/02/01/apple_blocks_java_mac/

Have you looked at Settings>Appearance>Change?

Have you considered a net nanny style program instead? It seems a much simpler option and you'd be notified if it was tampered with.

Browser toolbars, unwanted extra browsers and McAfee cr*p are regular pests. I'm very careful to uncheck the "include" when installing programs and updates.

Have a great day! (Sorry. )