White_Dragon

That is one shocking moment after another

Q) What Do you Call an Irishman that does nothing but sit around on the Back porch, never says anything, never bothers anybody, and is always ready for anybody to just sit around with? > > > > > > > > > > > A) Patty-O-Furniture

Well Rugger nobody can ever say you don't have Balls, MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR

That was a Great Christmas Greeting to the Boys up North. My wife liked it too and she doesn't like much.

I know of a couple Million People in the Middle East I would love to send one to. Puts a whole new look at Having a Doll you can "BANG" Just need to tag them as Sex Toy "FOR Terrorist ONLY" instructions Insert Cock and pull string!

With the end of the Year coming to an end and Christmas Dec. 25, 2015 tomorrow I have to say Being a Member of "XI" and making the many friends I've made in the past couple years, "Thanks for being the Best Group of Men and Women I have had the Privilege of Talking, Joking, and game playing with since I left the Military 40 years ago." Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah and Happy New to each and every member and their Families. Be safe and Hope to shoot you Soon or thaw you in FT.

on the COD WaW DM Game server there is a hacker by the name of "Wassgood" that had 54 headshots and only died 17 times. next closest player had a 25 Kill score with 15 deaths and he was one of the regulars with usually high scores, the Hacker Wassgood was using a sniper Rifle to run and Gun. This is the third time I have seen him on the server I wanted to let the ADM for that server to watch for him as when the ADM was in game he was getting a score of 10 to 12 and when ADM left his score went sky high.

One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. Dirty Little Johnny asked, "Grandpa, can I smoke some of your cigarettes?" His grandpa replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" "No", said Dirty Little Johnny. His grandpa replied, "Then you're not old enough." The next day, Dirty Little Johnny saw his grandpa drinking beer. He asked, "Grandpa, can I drink some of your beer?" His grandpa replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" "No" said Dirty Little Johnny. "Then you're not old enough." his grandpa replied. The next day, Dirty Little Johnny was eating cookies. His grandpa asked, "Can I have some of your cookies?" Little Johnny replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" His grandpa replied, "It most certainly can!" Dirty Little Johnny replied, "Then go fuck yourself."

One day at the end of Class Little Johnny's teacher asks the class to go home and think of a story to be concluded by telling the class the moral of that story. The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story. Little Suzy was first to raise her hand. "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load all the baskets of chicken eggs we collected into the back of his Pickup Truck, we take them to the town Market. As we were driving down the dirt road to town he hit a big bump and most of the eggs flew out of the truck onto the dirt road and broke. The teacher asked "what is the moral of your story?", Suzy replied "Don't put all your eggs in one Basket" Little Miss Lucy went next. My dad owns a Farm too. Every weekend we place all the Chicken eggs in the incubator. This past weekend only half of the eggs hatched. Again, the teacher asked for the moral of her story. Miss lucy replied,"Don't count your chicken before they hatch". The teacher went through student story after story and finally Just Little Johnny was left. The teacher said "OK little Johnny lets hear your story" Dirty Little Johnny replied with "My Uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam War, His plane was shot down over the enemy territory. He jumped out in plenty of time before it crashed, Just before he jumped he grabbed a case of beer, an M-16 with 70 rounds and his machete. while floating down he chugged his case of beer. When he landed he ended up in the middle of 100 Viet Cong. He shot and killed 70 of the Viet Cong with his M-16, But that used up all his bullets! So he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more and hitting his Machete on a Bloder it broke off the blade, So he killed the last 10 with his bare hands. The teacher looked a little shocked . Then after clearing her voice she asked " What possible moral could there be from this story?" Well Dirty little Johnny Replied , "The Moral of this story is, Don't Fuck with My Uncle Ted when he's been Drinking especially when he's run out of Beer".

noresepectfu where did you get that Dear suit?

Now that's a Funny joke, so much so that I blew a mouth full of beer out through my nose as I finished reading it and almost choked to Death.

So did the teacher give you Detention for cheating?

Dirty Johnny has a Sister named Little Sally. Little sally was shopping at a yard sale one day and found a dusty old antique Mirror. Seeing it was for sale for only $5.00 she bought it and took it home and cleaned it up. Once it was all cleaned she saw that on the back was some faint writing that said "make any rhyme to make any wish " Now she had read this aloud. At that same time Dirty Johnny was peaking through the slightly open door and heard what she said and then watched as his sister made her rhyme and wish. "Mirror Mirror on the wall make my tits as big as Basketballs" and then after a second "Poof, poof, bam, bam, poof" her tits grew to be as big as a pair of Basketballs. In Her excitement she ran out of her room and out the front door and across the street to show her best friend her good fortune. She ran out of the room so fast that she never noticed Dirty Johnny standing just down the hall. Once she was out sight Dirty Johnny ran into her room grabbed the Mirror off the wall and ran to his room with it. He then reread what was written on the back of the mirror and Hung it on a hook on the back of his bedroom door. He then started his rhyming wish. "Mirror Mirror on my Door make my Dick touch the floor" and as with his sister before "Poof Poof Bam Bam Poof" and his legs started shrinking.

I don't deal well with Death be it friends or Family. I'm sorry for your loss and this will be very hard on your son as my real mom passed when I was 9 years old and I didn't take it well and held in most of my feelings until the Day I returned from Viet Nam and my Dad said my Mom would have been proud of me. So Best wishes to you and watch your son as it may be harder on him when ever Holidays come or when graduation from High School & Collage is when he will need you the most. Good Life to you and your Son!! Your Friend with Dan AKA White_Dragon

Little Johnny & The Spelling "B" It's the first day of the new school year and the teacher wants to see who knows what. Good Morning Class It's Monday morning and the I have decided to have a spelling "B" and Says "OK Class here are the rules for today's Spelling "B" I will go through the alphabet starting with the Letter "A" and will call on students one at a time. That student will repeat the letter make a word then spell that word and then put that word in a Sentence" The teacher then says the first letter is "A" who would like to start? At that instant Little Johnny jumps up and says "A" ASS Hole A-s-s-h-o-l-e Timmy is a Fucking Ass Hole! The teacher almost falls over backward and screams out NO! NO! NO! Johnny That just will not Do!! now Sit down and do not blurt out again !! I will call the students name I want to do each letter and word, Johnny just sit there and be silent unless I call your name! So the teacher goes through the alphabet and every letter Little Johnny has his hand up frantically waving it in the air and every once in awhile will start to blurt out but, the teacher catches him before he can get more the letter out. Finally she get to the letter "R" and thinks to herself Little johnny can't possibly come up with a dirty word for the letter "R" and she decides to call him and says "OK Johnny it your turn and the Letter is "R" ! Little Johnny sits there puzzled for a moment and then slowly says "R" with a short pause then says "R" again in a loud Voice- "R" RAT R-A-T A big old FUCKING RAT with a big old FUCKING LONG TAIL.

Little Johnny Jokes LOL. There must be hundreds of them and this is the first time I've ever seen or heard this one. Very funny and great graphics !!

Not only Married to Mary but Fred really is stuck on her, Or is that stuck to her? LOL

When all the trees have been cut down, When all the animals have been hunted, When all the waters are polluted, When all the air is unsafe to breath, Only then will everyone know... You can not eat Money.

Welcome to Forums !!! Don't take everything you read here personal, Remember we are just a group of Idiots, Extreme Idiots that is.

MrFitt You asked "how do I remember all their Names"? I remember them because they each know their own name and don't have any Idea what Here Kitty-Kitty is about. My 10 cats living Now 1. Daisy---- My oldest girl at 18 she thinks she's my mother. 2. Lacy----- she will be 15 on Oct 1st 3. Dewy---- He will be 14 Oct 15th and always wakes me at 6 A.M. wanting Breakfast and I get up and feed everybody 4. Holly----- She is Dewy's litter sister & also will be 14 Oct 15th 5. Huey----- He is My wife's Cat and is 12 years old 6. Sammie- My largest Cat at 22 lbs. and we call her Sam 12 years old 7. Winston- male of two wild Cats I caught in 2004 11 years old at our best guess 8. Willow--- Sister of Winston and I'm the only person she will allow to pick up even after 11 years she is still wild and will tear the head off everybody else but Rio Grande He's the Boss of all 9. Rio Grande -- He thinks I'm his Brother and where ever I go in the house you can find him within a few feet of me 24 hours a day and waits at front Door when I leave until I return and he is the Alpha Cat a natural born Scrapper, He rules the house and Rocky is his best friend and can get away with anything 10. Rocky-- The Baby of the bunch at 3 years old and is as his name implies. He Never ever walks anywhere when he leaves a spot it's at a full Sprint and I call him "ROCKET Man" Then There are My Sons 3 cats he moved back home with 5 years ago 11.Mabel-- She thinks I'm the Feed Master and is 8 years old 12. Poisy--- She is the Grumbler and spits and hisses at everybody except at Rio he tore her a new ass when he was 9 weeks old and last comes 13. Dougie- the Clown he is 9 years old and thinks he's is 6 months old I think he is retarded but he is a nice little 17 pound CAT that hasn't got a clue, Except he does know his own name. LOL I remember each of my cats name and they each know each of the other cats names on at least Rio Grande Does because I can make him attack any other cat if they bother me before 6:00 A.M. I have had over 60 Cats in my life time and everyone of them knew their own name and I still remember their names. The funniest thing is that My wife's name is "KAT"

Adolf Hitler was born in 1889 in fact Apr 20, 1889 - Died Apr 30, 1945 if he was still alive he would be 126 years old and he wasn't Ecuadorian he was Polish/Dutch. Oh and he was a total Nut Case!!!!!​

I have 12 indoor cats from age 2-1/2 to 19 years old. Your little girl looks like she would like the name "Cassie" You know cats each have 3 names #1. The Name you give them. #2. The nick name they acquire as they grow older and their personality shows. #3. Their secret name that only they know and you can only guess at. VERY IMPORTANT !! Never Ever call your cat by "Here Kitty Kitty Kitty" that way she won't run to just anybody, always call them by their #1 name when you want them to come to you. As I said I have 12 Cats and each one only comes to me when I call that one by it's name and the rest just ignore Me until I call them each by their name or I say "WHO WANTS MUNCHIES" at which I have a Cat stampede at my feet.

In a crowed city at a busy bus stop, a beautiful young woman who was waiting for a bus was wearing a tight mini skirt. As the bus stopped and her turn came to get on , she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her to lift her leg high enough to get to the first step. Slightly embarrassed & with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a few inches, thinking that this would give her the slack needed to raise her leg to the first step only to discover she still couldn't. So, being a little more embarrassed she once again reached behind herself and unzipped her skirt another 3 inches. Once again to her dismay, she still could not raise her leg high enough. With another little smile at the bus drive she reached behind herself for a third time and unzipped her skirt another couple inches and once again to her dismay could not raise her leg enough to reach the bottom step. About this Time , a very large Texan who was standing behind her picked her up ever so gently and placed her on the first step of the bus. She then went Ballistic and turned to the would be good Samaritan and yelled, "How Dare You Touch My Body! I don't even Know who you are!" The Texan Smiled and and with his southern Draw said " Well, ma'am, normally I would agree with ya,all but after you unzipped my fly three times I Kind,a figured we was becoming fast friends.

I'll bet this guy would try to stuff an elephant in his pants when he went to the ZOO. Then when attempting to leave the ZOO he would claim to just have a hard on!! what a stupid dork.

So far I have played on 9 maps these past two days and bullets won't go thru leaves when I shoot but the other team has no problem shooting thru those same leaves to kill me. Doesn't mater what weapon I use, even when I'm standing in and open field with no folage near me when I shoot all I see is leaf splatter at the end of my gun barrel and the person I'm shooting at turns and kills me. This also happens at point blank range I have completely Deleted and reloaded COD World at War and it still happens. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH THIS WEEKS MAPS on World of War Freeze Tag ????? Foliage is missing from the Maps but the Mechanics are still in place invisible, so some trees, Bushes, & walls have been removed but you can't shoot or walk through them from one side but the other team Can shoot through them.