Dark Asylumn

MAKE IT A GREAT DAY!!! _ This has to be one of the best emails I have received in a long time because when you sit and think about the meaning, it is so true. Law of the Garbage Truck One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was really friendly. So I asked, 'Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!' This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck.' He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets. The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so ... Love the people who treat you right. Pray for the ones who don't. Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it! Have a garbage-free day! "Faith is not believing God can, it is knowing that God will."

we are idiots not douche bags geez get it right

Welcome to the clan, remember bring plenty of beer, dont eat all the cookies and stand right over there on that x over there ........................... x

Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson Once in a while, a cartoon comes around that absolutely hits the nail on the head.

you kill me??? FUCK YOU!!!!!!!! I kill me ANDYOU lmfao

I use that line about my smoking pot lol uhhhh wait what was I saying I cant seem to remember

I am with Bud here. what the hell are yall talking about money in the pic I see no money what so ever all I see is a mighty tight ass

The Queen has spoken Here ye Here ye by order of the Queen all personal inspections must now pass through her thank you for your understanding and cooperation

Just a slight “misunderstanding”!!!! Subject: New Rabbi At the regular Saturday morning service, the rabbi announced that he was planning to leave for a larger congregation, that would pay him more. There is a hush within the congregation. No one wanted him to leave, because he is so popular. Fred Shapiro, who owns several car dealerships in Newton and Brookline , stands up and proclaims "If the rabbi stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year, and his wife with a Honda mini-van, to transport their children!" The congregation sighs in appreciation and applauds. Saul Cohen, a successful businessman and lawyer, stands and says, "If the rabbi will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary, and establish a foundation to guarantee a free college education for his children!" More sighs and loud applause. Estelle Rubin, age 88, stands and announces with a smile, "If the rabbi stays, I will give him sex!" There is total silence. The rabbi, blushing, asks her: "Mrs. Rubin, you're a wonderful and holy lady. Whatever possessed you to say that?" Estelle's 90-year old husband, Abe, is now trying to hide, holding his forehead with the palm of his hand, and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replied "Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, "Fuck him."

Nice one

Our house was gutted due to a fire in 04, was rebuilt nicely, and is right under 2000 sq ft, on 5 acres with 1500 ft US highway frontage. It was valued at 49,000 earlier this year, b4 the fire when land values were low and the house was at only 1400 sqft it appraised at 65,000. our land has taken a nose dive over the last few years

many many versions I like DMX, joe cocker, lighthouse but Bill Withers IS the King

Congratulations man she is a beautiful little girl. now wheres my cigar

glad to see you made it out safe

I would probably be up for that

DEEJAYKEG Hope there isn't a storm surge if you're going to the beach! I thought the idea was to take cover/ seek shelter! Batten down the hatches, folks, and stay safe. yes but you see caper is a redneck canadian ehhh. You will also hear him say "hold my beer" alot

Zoe Tball I'm scared Zoe hold me you called me? what happend t-ball.. are they picking on you? you want me to spank their butts? edit: i'm afraid that gorilla is going to like it well if your gonna spank butts of the mean ole people then, tball I will pick on ya too

well all I have to say is this I saw my first internet censor yesterday I cant explain it well but I will try ok right after the rig exploded all the search sites and news sites had headlines and banners of the explosion, this was for about an hour- an hour and a half, then all of a sudden almost all the information was GONE, I mean GONE. the only info out at that point was about the oil sheen with just a paragraph or 2 about the rig, explosion, and owners. it did say only 1 was injured. now I checked the search engines and news channels, they all reflected this "new" information. now I dont know what happened. but it was very clear that the information was different and not really related to the first sets of information. now How does a vast majority of info just dissapear. I have no Idea but it should scare the shit out of you. Again this is just what I viewed over the course of a few hours.

When Ford was President..we had Bob Hope and Johnny Cash. Now Obama is president we have no hope and no cash

lmao

fireurza that is why texas is the best that why everything is bigger in texas, deep fried everything, when is the deep fried oil coming to town, last year was deep fried butter

hey I only have a cat to kill the mice, but I have do have a dog he is rather small for his breed

RickJames greywolf2 If you do not like do not look! LOL Me so horny me luv you long time

so sad to lose a big name even if its just renamed