HarryWeezer

My mother couldn't hit us hard enough. The most dreaded words in my house: "You wait until your father gets home."

Like Rugger says, every time you want to smoke, do something else. When I quit, every time I wanted a cigarette, I jerked off. Unfortunately, I couldn't kick either habit and now I'm always coughing and my dick is always sore. Good luck!!!!!

You WILL kick its ass!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also to be found in Great Britain: Bagshot, Barton-in-the-beans, Broad Laying, Cock Alley, Drunkendub, Great Snoring, Little Snoring, Ham and Sandwich, Mucking, Nasty, North Piddle, Oliver's Battery, Pant-y-fridd, Pity Me, Titley, Tongue, Twelveheads, and, Upper Dicker. In Canada: Hairy Hill, Alberta; Dildo, Newfoundland; St. Louis de Ha Ha, Quebec; Bangs Falls, Nova Scotia; and Ecum Secum, Novia Scotia But how would you like to be from any of these places in the US: Frog Eye, AL Intercourse, AL Lickskillet, AL Monkey's Eyebrow, AZ Hog Jaw, AR Toad Suck, AR Nowhere, CO Two Egg, FL Gay, GA Snap Finger, GA Talking Rock, GA Beer Bottle Crossing, ID French Lick, IN Toad Hop, IN Sac City, IA Bever Lick, KY Bee Lick, KY Big Bone Lick, KY Deer Lick, KY Penile, KY Wolf Lick, KY Climax, MN Dinkytown, MN Hot Coffee, MS Knob Lick, MO Village of Four, MO Hungry Horse, MT Organ, NM Lizard Lick, NC Idiotville, OR Sugar Tit, SC Bugscuffle, TN Love Lady, TN Sweet Lips, TN Bangs, TX Little Hope, TX Muleshoe, TX Bullfrog, UT Mexican Hat, UT Bread Loaf, VT Satans Kingdom, VT Butts, VA Cuckoo, VA Nuttsville, VA Onancock, VA Short Pump, VA Threeway, VA Paw Pay, WV Dickeyville, WI Embarrass, WI Big Hole, WY

Nice to meet you Austin. that must be your sister in your avatar cause you're too damned ugly for that sweet thing to be anything else.

WELCOME!!!!!!

+6000 Lol! I kill you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And may Allah bless you - welcome!

Delighted to have you with us.

Welcome to the Good Ship Idiot

Welcome - keep your powder dry and your dick in the dirt.

Good suggestion!!!!!!!!!!

Repeated accusations of cheating should result in a ban. If there's no admin in there when you hear this, make notes of who and what was said, and forward to a COD4 admin. They'll take it from there. The crap about spawn camping usually is just that - it's best ignored UNLESS someone actually is constantly spawn camping, in which case either the above, or help us out with video.

We know it's not his flopping tits that get you excited Noears...

Likewise, hope to see more of you. Thanks for checking in!!

I simply cannot believe you intentionally exposed me to this. Thank you very much. Do you know that you just destroyed the efforts of dozens of psychiatrists and a half-century of treatment? How could you? I am slowly keyboarding this message while huddled in a corner of my bedroom in a near-fetal position, awash in my own bodily fluids and filth, unable even to unlock the door to allow my poor wife in with my drugs. I fear I shall never again leave this room, else I be exposed to TV screens, the sight of which cause my bowels to move involuntarily, nor go outside where I might chance upon one of the objects of the severe mental distress which has plagued me since my parents exposed me to 1950s cartoon violence. Oh, the abject horror of Elmer Fudd, bent on unloading both barrels into that poor, little bunny rabbit or Daffy Duck screaming "Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo! Hoo-hoo!" as he tried to escape that murderous fiend. If it wasn't Foghorn Leghorn trying to wring the neck of defenseless little chickens, it was Sylvester eating an imprisoned Tweety Bird alive, ALIVE, for God's sake. Or Yosemite Sam firing his six-shooters indiscrimately at anything that walked by. And then, and then, there was the worst: the abject violence of Brutus and Popeye doing things to each other than no human should endure. You don't know what it did to me, what I've been through. But then, how could you? How could anyone understand the years and years of tormented nightmares which led me to terrible things like hanging my sister's Barbie from the Lilac tree or putting her Little Miss Muffy doll in the coal furnace; or making up terrible rhymes about pure and innocent Dick and Jane - even Christmas was not spared. Dare I repeat it: "Jingle Bells, shotgun shells, rabbit got away." (Please forgive me.) Yes, it was those terrible, violent cartoons that led me to evil, to the dark side, to creating clay rockets with little clay people in them that I would hurl against the wall so as to warp and twist the little clay bodies; to loading my slingshot with sand to wreak havoc on innocent hornets; to frying those poor little ants on the sidewalk with a magnifying glass, to shooting toy soldiers with my BB gun and then and then, at long last, to the greatest horror of them all: joining XI that I might virtually kill by the hundreds, nay, by the thousands, even my friends and fellow clansmen and any others that dared cross my path. It took many years, but I finally buried these terrible memories and lock them away in some dark recess of my mind. Until today. Until today. I don't know that I can go on. I, I.........

He is in our thoughts

OMG: http://www.theonion.com/articles/phelps-drowns,29059/

Hxtr was not born. He came from a petrie dish, the accidental mixing of orangutan sperm and a platypus egg.

You're all fired!!! (that was some funny shit...)

No, no no - thanks, but absolutely unnecessary Mike. To the contrary, sorry if my first post gave that impression; I should have explained it. (Hxtr: you're STILL a douchebag... )

S W E E T !!!!!!!!

Good grief Mike I am not suggesting you are racist. I'm suggesting that the image of a black man chasing a piece of chicken may be seen as such. (Hxtr, your momma was an oversexed platypus, and your father smelt of Brylcreem and Old Spice)

Funny at first glance, but a bit racist?