KIDS IN CHURCH

[JohnnyDos]

                                      

 

    A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus'
    mother's name?"  One child answered, "Mary."
    The teacher then asked, "Who knows what Jesus' father's name was?" A
    little kid said, "Verge."
    Confused, the teacher asked, "Where did you get that?"
    The kid said, "Well, you know, they are always talking about Verge n'
    Mary.''

    ***********
    KIDS IN CHURCH
    3-year-old Reese:
    "Our Father, Who does art in
    heaven, Harold is His name.
    Amen."

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


    A little boy was overheard praying:
    "Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm
    having a real good time like I am."

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all
    the way home in the back seat of the car.
    His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy
    replied, "That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian
    home, and I wanted to stay with you guys."
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's
    Prayer for several evenings at bedtime.
    She would repeat after me the lines from the prayer.
    Finally, she decided to go solo.
    I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to
    the end of the prayer:
    "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us from E-mail.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    One particular four-year-old prayed,
    "And forgive us our trash baskets
    as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to
    church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One
    bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother, Joel, were sitting
    together in church. Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud. Finally,
    his big sister had had enough.
    "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church."
    "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked.
    Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men
    standing by the door?
    They're hushers."

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


    A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin 5, and Ryan 3.  The
    boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake.  Their mother
    saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He
    would say, 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.'
    Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    A father was at the beach with his children when the four-year-old son
    ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore where a
    seagull lay dead in the sand.
    "Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked.
    "He died and went to Heaven," the Dad replied.
    The boy thought a moment and then said,
    "Did God throw him back down?"

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


    A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their
    six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" "I
    wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied. "Just say what you hear
    Mommy say," the wife answered.  The daughter bowed her head and said,
    "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"
 

[Sammy]

I agree, Deliver us from e-mail. Its the devils work.