daMike

Happy Birthday - means you were SOOOOO close to be an easter bunny :-D

A silent Dukoo - nice.
Best of luck with the surgery.

A silent Dukoo - nice.
Best of luck with the surgery.

isnt that what we call "pickin on the little guy".........(we should go pick alot harder)

maybe he is more like a butt-man

i dont bother to do the math - i might even have been retired then

oohhh - and here i thought it allways picked me.....specially with Chili on the server...

Nice kid and polite on the servers too - says "sorry i killed you alot" after the game

Nice kid and polite on the servers too - says "sorry i killed you alot" after the game

Nice kid and polite on the servers too - says "sorry i killed you alot" after the game

Nice kid and polite on the servers too - says "sorry i killed you alot" after the game

HAPPY that you survived surgery (some is known not to survive and the n they died later...i mean,,,well some died even the surgery was a success...perhaps it depends on the surgeon..) it cool - though?? will the snow still get yellow if you...you know...take a piss

I never had an iPhone - but i recently bought an LG Optimus G which i am thrilled  over the hill about - i only wish it had buttons so i could call someone

If i believed in gods you would be in my prayers though you have my compassion and support.

After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly succesful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits. Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus's birthday as a bit of a treat.
I ordered it well in advance and working in the North sea I considered myself a bit above some of the characters writing the previous reviews and wrote them off as soft office types...oh my fellow sufferers how wrong I was. I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.
 
At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head. Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the destruction of the meat and two veg. Struggling to not bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel of in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair. Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief. I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, tore the lid of and positioned it under me. The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing soon returned .
 
Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the drawer for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon.I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so.I took a handful of them and tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse. This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found it's way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running it's engines behind me.
This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain. The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before.
Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering..." Ooooh that feels good ". Understandably this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn't heard her come in it caused an involutary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction. I can understand that having a sprout farted against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the kids the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my status...So to sum it up Veet removes hair, dignity and self respect...

Even im like REALLY old - i still dont hang on to the COD2 game - thus my son still consider me a dinosaur for playing COD4 - so the difference might be the same :-)

good1   i might use that sentence "i dont know - u was like that when i came in here!" in the future.

Thank you all for the warm welcome - i look forward to play with you some more and to kill UnChileno continously.....and Bogleg...lets barry that fool in the smurt and dig him up next summer

Girls - trying to cultivate an entire field with 3 sticks....tttssshhh. :-)

....i might fail on the age thing - i´m way past 18

heeyyyy - what happened?
 
Just two nights ago i got my first NUKE ever - and maybe the last - since i´ve been palying for years and never had any before.
 
And the opposition was yelling : camper - damike is a supercamper - camping the bridge. (Read the contracts tiny lettered passenges - i´m  allowed)
 
Hell bitches - i was merely guarding the wooden bridge so none of you lagging mfo´ couldn´t get across
 
Well - it was fun and hopefully i´ll get another shortly
 
 

heeyyyy - what happened?
 
Just two nights ago i got my first NUKE ever - and maybe the last - since i´ve been palying for years and never had any before.
 
And the opposition was yelling : camper - damike is a supercamper - camping the bridge. (Read the contracts tiny lettered passenges - i´m  allowed)
 
Hell bitches - i was merely guarding the wooden bridge so none of you lagging mfo´ couldn´t get across
 
Well - it was fun and hopefully i´ll get another shortly
 
 

Did you know that Chuck Norris once had a rug of bearskin in his bedroom. The bear wearen´t actually dead - it was just afraid to move!!!

Did you know that Chuck Norris once had a rug of bearskin in his bedroom. The bear wearen´t actually dead - it was just afraid to move!!!