little_old_man

I ate a half pound of cherries yesterday and my intestinal tract feels like a million bucks.

I'm going to start spelling his name as FUCK so I don't have to look at that little rubber ducky icon any more.

Sorry I can't watch the video. There is a conflict with some Apple software on my PC that diables video links. THAT'S the legacy of Steve Jobs.

So I guess that means I have the biggest "member" this month.

SILENCE you Canadian scoundrel.

Starfire, Start up the game and from the main menu go to Options and from there go to the top of the next menu under Controls and click Move. The next screen shows you which keys are assigned for movement. Here is what it should say, or at least what mine says. Forward W Backpedal S Move Left A Move Right D Lean Left Q Lean Right E Stand/Jump Space Go to Crouch C Go to Prone Ctrl All the rest of the choices are "Unbound" on mine. If your setting are already like mine shown above and you still can't move forward or back then there is something else going on with your PC. Good luck! LOM

How he acts in the video isn't really far from the truth. The guy is literally fucking nuts.

Tubing? Is that Canadian for spooning?

Yeah, and he was only 51 and dropped dead of a heart attack. Kind of makes you want to go out and get a physical now doesn't it?

You caught us Joe, we're all ganging up on you.

Sounds like a great idea Las. Here you go.

Thanks everybody! Does this mean I get July too since nobody knew about it until the end of June? I would like my cash prize donated to a charity, the White Swallow bath house in San Francisco.

Beer, save your fetishes for XI Fest. I'm certain people will be lined up to sample your talents.

There you go, now you're at 1000 likes and eligible for whatever new medal they come up with.

Illinois doesn't count Joe. Every single politician to come out of that state is corrupt, and I mean EVERY one. Just ask somebody who lives there. I think the mafia runs political training schools there.

Looks like it's time for a new PC.

They don't fuck around with corrupt politicians. This isn't intended to be a political discussion other than my admiration for the Canadian system keeping the rift-raft from getting out of hand. Kudos to them for doing it right, and the US could use some pointers from them. Montreal mayor arrested by anti-corruption squad-reports http://www.nbcnews.com/id/52228722/ns/world_news-americas

While I was (sort of) kidding about the midget port I was serious about the COD2 patch. Go here and download the file to see if you have the latest version installed. Sometimes files get corrupted and just don't work any longer. http://www.fileplanet.com/162314/download/Call-of-Duty-2-Patch-v1.3

If you can play on your son's computer and not yours, that tells me that the problem is with your computer. As I recall the last time I had that error I needed to download a COD2 patch from the web. Your patch file may have been corrupted by watching too much midget porn.

Joe, 2 days? We were playing yesterday afternoon and you were there. Hitting the bottle a little early today are we?

Just be careful if your mastiff is dog aggressive. Danes are very gentle and get along with most dogs, but a mastiff might feel threatened by such a large dog and go after it. We had a dane many years ago and it quite literally wouldn't hurt a fly.

Happy father's day you mother.

Bob, Sorry you're having a rough time but things have a way of working out. If you haven't already, I would STRONGLY suggest that you get a second and maybe even a third opinion on your wife's back before she has surgery. 20 years ago my wife had a bad bike accident. She hit a curb, flew over the handle bars and landed on her chin. It broke her jaw in 3 places and several years later we found out that the accident really messed up her neck. The pain was horrible and she was willing to do just about anything to help it stop. She ended up going to a spinal center in northern California and the doctor said that a simple fall or car accident could paralize her for life, and she needed to have surgery immediately which involved what they're telling your wife, fusing the vertebra in her neck with pieces of bone from her leg. She was all ready to go for it when a woman friend of ours who's husband was a doctor suggested getting a second opinion which we did with a neurosurgeon. That doctor told us that surgery wouldn't help, and he simply suggested yoga and medications to help with the pain. It's now 20+ years later and my wife takes her pain meds with a patch under her arm every three days and it keeps the pain in check without any side effects from the drugs. She runs 5 miles a day and has done a great job raising our three kids and continues to do so to this day. I'm not saying that it will work exactly the same way for your wife, but before she goes under the knife (which could possibly make things worse) you both should talk to a couple different doctors for their opinions. Back surgery is a very big deal and I would tell anybody to only do it as an absolute last resort. Good luck!

The video looks like it was taken in Hawaii where there are lots of big maneaters. You wouldn't catch me out there fishing in anything less than a 14 ft aluminum boat. This is a 6 foot surfboard next to the girl in Hawaii who lost her arm when that chunk of the board was bitten off. This is the stern of an ocean kayak in New Zealand that a white shark decided to nibble on. This is a photoshopped picture of a guy in a white sharks mouth. Stupid, but it made me laugh. This is what I would do with my stump if a shark ever bit off one of my limbs.