HarryWeezer

In honor of International Blondes Day... A blonde out roller skating with her Ipod on, sees a salon and decides to get a hair cut. The stylist asks her to take her headphones off to which the blonde asks her to cut around them because she can't take them off. While she's cutting the blonde falls asleep, so the stylist takes off the headphones, whereupon the blonde falls over dead. The stylist calls 911 then picked up the headphones to see what the blonde was listening to: "breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out..." If a blonde and a brunette fell off a building, who would hit the ground first? The brunette - the blonde would have to stop for directions. The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. "Six please," she said. "I could never eat twelve." A blonde was walking down the road with a healthy looking pig under her arm. As she passed the bus stop, someone asked, "Where did you get that?" The pig replied, "I won her in a raffle." A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall. She showed him the instructions on the tin, "For best results, put on two coats." Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. First blonde: "I can't seem to get this door unlocked." Second blonde: Well you better hurry up. It's starting to rain and the top is down." Three blondes were walking through a field when they came across a set of tracks. The first blonde looked down at the tracks and said, "I think they could be bird tracks." The second blonde went to look and said, "No, I think these are deer tracks." They stepped aside and the third blonde went over to the tracks. She looked down, then got run over by a train. A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied, "You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer." A blonde was driving down the road listening to the radio and was quite upset when she heard blonde joke after blonde joke. A little way down the road, she saw another blonde out in a field rowing a boat. The blonde stopped her car and angrily jumped out yelling, "You dumb blonde bimbo. It's blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name. If I could swim I'd come out there and give you what's coming to you." A blonde and a redhead went to the bar after work for a drink, and sat on stools watching the 6 o'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge, and the blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump. Sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead $50. The redhead said, "I can't take this, you're my friend." But the blonde insisted saying, "No. A bet's a bet." Then the redhead said "listen, I have to tell you that I saw this on the 5 o'clock news, so I can't take your money." The blonde replied, "well, so did I, but I didn't think he would jump again." A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country. After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and thought, "Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!" She got out and walked over to the farmer and said, "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?" The farmer, being a bit of a gambler himself, said she could have a try. The blonde looked at the flock and guessed, "157." The farmer was amazed - she was right! So the blonde, (who looked like a brunette), picked one out and got back into her car. Before she left, farmer walked up to her and said. "If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?" Q: What do you call an eternity? A: Four Blondes in four cars at a four way stop. Q: Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes? A: Toes Go In First. Q: What do SMART Blondes and UFOs have in common? A: You always hear about them but never see them. Q: Why do Blondes always smile during lightning storms? A: They think their picture is being taken. Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two, one to hold the light bulb and one to spin the ladder around! Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because the can said "concentrate" on it. Q: Do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&M factory? A: For throwing out the W's Q: Why is it good to have a blonde passenger? A: You can park in the handicap zone. Q: Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency? A: She can't find the number 11 on the telephone buttons. Q: What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is on? A: It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off. Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? A: Pregnant. Q: There are 17 blonds standing outside a disco but why couldn't they get in? A: The sign said "must be 18 to enter". Q: Why are there no brunette jokes? A: Because blondes would have to think them up.

Ditto!!!!

beeech what ya sayin buddy What the hell have you all in this month??you have devil in the ass....I'm tired fu all beeches.. Heh heh. I don't know quite what the hell he's saying either. But I THINK it's funny.

Not speaking for anyone else here. For me, there's a line that's not to be crossed. For instance, if you're a racist, you've crossed it, and I'll have nothing at all to do with you, not now, not ever. Similarly, anyone who says America deserved to be attacked on 9/11, or, is happy that we were attacked on 9/11, also has crossed it. I also think that when you come into someone's house, you show respect and conduct yourself with civility, or, you should be asked to leave.

Congrats guys, on the promotion, and access to the admin hacks. I highly recommend the cloak of inivisibility hack, which you can use to walk right up to not-so-mean Dean, and cut HIS balls off.

You see the same responses as regards the current political scandals or when young people are questioned about any aspect of history or current affairs. These people aren't stupid. They're just ignorant, in part because our shools are failing but mostly because they are entirely captive in a different culture that is alien to we older Americans. As many of them said, they just don't care; they reject traditional American society and its core values - including education and personal responsibility. I don't know if we can fix that. I fear for the future of the country; these people vote.

"and breast sizes" - with pictures, PLEASE? Oh, and if you need someone to judge, I have extensive experience in that regard...

Happy birthday Killingham!!!

Have a great birthday Dirk!!

Most kind Cross. Thank you!!

Fair comment as regards me Damage - I don't know about Ph4nt0m's situation. But Hxtr "lived here" for many years, racking up, I believe, more than 7,000 posts - upbeat, supportive, and funny. He is and always has been a genuinely nice guy, giving when he could, making others laugh, keeping it going. He gave much of himself to XI - too much, as he found. He obsessed with the web site and it was having a negative impact on his life. He felt he had to leave to regain control. Certainly, he didn't want to do that. He said he saw it as necessary for his personal well-being. His doing so certainly does not diminish in any way his huge contributions here, a depth of involvement and dedication to XI that, I would suggest, deserves better, than just "fkem." Rather, he is to be commended for all he has done for the clan and I feel sure his many, many friends here would agree.

HEY!!! Just a minute there Hans - I'm not gone. I'm right over here - in that somewhat cobwebbed corner of XI looking at naked Japanese women on the XI web site and, uh, getting reacquainted with myself, so to speak. Appreciate the thought though.

Did you have her for lunch or take her to lunch??? That would be "for" lunch. Hard to believe now, but back in the day I was a studly type guy who thought taking women "to" lunch a waste of time and money; better just to "git 'er done" and move on to the next one. (And yupper, I expect the XI ladies are going to hammer me for that one... )

Indeed it does. But we have many more registered users than clan members and additional forums would be available to all of them, thus possibly increasing site participation to all our benefit.

It is a terrible thing to taunt we old farts with images of such sweet young things. We have only the memories of what it was like to have one of these darlings for lunch.

Over here in registered member land one gains appreciation for the social networking aspects of XI. In thinking about ways to broaden interest and appeal, I wonder if some additional forums would help. Suggestions: HOME, GARDEN & HOBBIES - Working on the house or garden, traveling, into photography? MUSIC AND VIDS - What are you listening to today? ALL THINGS SPORTS - Who's going to win or lose; what are you into in recreational sports? (Music is very popular on the site but doesn't have a home where folks can find it in one place.) Have a great day...

(Please disregard. Due to lack of coffee, I posted in the wrong area.)

Besides which, you had enough medals hanging on your chest to melt down and make a new car with.

If that was my child I would have my revenge, regardless how long it took. And it wouldn't be pretty.

Good to hear LOC

これは長続きしませんので希望は非常によく翻訳しません。

As I well know, you've got to do what you've got to do. In time, I will be back my good friend and I hope you will be too, so that we can both start over, together, as we did more than six years ago. Peace, and all my best!!!!

The body has lots if ways to heal itself. For instance, testosterone aids in healing the skin. So the sooner you quit jerking off six times a day with your right hand, the quicker your left hand will heal. Hang in there LOC, you know we're all thinking of you every day!