RobMc

Have they recently banned you from Twitter

Cos we have f..k all else to do

Kinky I've tried out the window but never thought of the sink, does it hurt?

He got it cheap when we left the EU, it can't go back.

True Story My eldest son when he lived here was returning from the pub well oiled one night, turning the corner he was confronted by four ponies grazing on my lawn. (escaped from local field). He stood swaying ,gazing at them for a while, then he pressed the bell and when I answered the door his words were :- 'Dad I think we've got rats' ??

Must be Thursday ???

URGENT mines full

Beware the voyeur

Cannon ?? we can't have catapults with the present pussies

Shiver me timbers, aaaaar, mooring ropes dear boy, anchor lines are connected to anchors not bollards, looks wider than a narrow boat ,so which canals are you limited to? For strangers the UK is riddled with canals post industrial revolution (yes we were the first), there was no standardisation of canals for width and depth (or length of locks come to that}. Consequently boats are of different sizes, narrowboats are VERY narrow, canals are mostly leisure and for you visitors a great way to see the country but research needed. The Caledonian canal is spectacular, I have done it both ways.

I watch all the off grid programmes on tv and all have the same problem, old age, not so great when you're old, but enjoy it while you can. My favourite is the old guy on the Alaska trains programme with one eye and a hook on the stump where he shot his own hand off, that is one tough dude. But you can sense that he is coming to the point where he gives up or dies because of lack of medical attention. Due to house prices a lot of people are living on houseboats, but costs are rising as it is becoming more popular. There is very little free land to purchase in the UK, and even when you do there will be a thousand laws to contend with. You cannot really legally live off the land for meat and fish supplies unless you have enough for a smallholding. The UK weather is not great for solar energy and there aren't many other alternatives. So although you can live outside of the mainstream it is actually difficult, as you cannot truly live off the land you are forced into earning money somewhere. My pimping empire hasn't so far strayed into rentboys, but if you're interested and at the 'bottom' of your savings I'm sure a few Tinder contacts can earn us both a few bob, especially when you mention turd drying ? We can get guys who will bend over backwards to help you, do you have a tight pair of jeans for the advert? How about a picture of the way into the boat's bathroom with 'Grab the taps' or glueing a gold sovereign to the galley floor? leave it to Rob. ps referring to the title we can include AC/DC - 'I plug into anything' ?

Now just hold on a minute here ?, just checked and at this time of year the sunrise is around 0830 ? your camera got night vision lol? I'll bet he lives in a high rise apartment and the 'bio fuels' are the neighbours cannabis crops.

Told you, Rob's started a civil war ?

Now now boys I didn't wish to start a civil war in Canada about eco friendly farts, reminds me of my honeymoon when my by now wife found out about what a 'lie in' really means with a man. We dry out and sell in pellet form our waste products as fertiliser in the UK, hence the saying by the French about British food 'tastes like shit', news for you boys those pellets ain't gravy granules.

No, but they do a good breakfast Me pedantic ? lmfao What type of bio fuel? do you dry out your turds?

I'm beginning to say that every day now ffs So you live on a barge??

I've stayed in Premier Inns too? You live in the SOUTH of England (so you said) it is almost impossible to be too far from civilisation with a density of people approaching the Netherlands. Fair enough, your idea of isolation may be different from mine but I can't see much foraging or hunting for food, I've lived down there (during the week) couldn't wait to drive the 400 miles home, far too many people for me mate.

Off grid??? you moving to Hastings you live in the UK? we have a national grid? wtf?

Hey now buddy, my diapers would pass any tests apart from leakage? The home are issuing me with the new 'thunderbolt clap' anti farting model soon, the manufacturers approached them for suitable test material. I can't say how proud I was to be called an old 'windbag', only downside is the increase in beans at dinnertime..

I've got the general idea by now of your weekly diet ? Monday - pizza Tuesday - pizza Wednesday - pizza Thursday - pizza Friday - pizza Saturday - pizza Sunday - lasagne

This may mean more than you think it does buddy

Too late for me sorry, but sounds fun

Looked a great ride

Your 'benchmarks' are from sitting in the park feeding the ducks you old fart

Thanks Street, a great pair of lungs