RobMc

Hey, used to buy my gear from that great bike outfitters in Coalville, they still there?

I've still got the scar in my hand where I was shot playing 'Cowboys and Indians' with a .177 Diana air rifle too, thank God we stopped when they took away our rimfires.

Our 'Little Rainbow', bet he looks like a custom paintjob after every round ?,

Chinese, as is MG etc etc

Are they a different age to the rest of you Vincent ??

The entire neighbourhood was terrified, would we wear matching tops, would our dresses clash with the tanks ? we fitted King and Queen seats to all the bikes, it was rough trying to get the Queen. Those were the days, arriving saddlesore after a long ride, much to the delight of the passenger. We were MEN.

Aaaah ! I wore that dress to my school reunion, some of the 'boys' offered me a lift home ?

Ouch, obviously you've forgotten my accident ? I did that buddy now I'm a cripple, bloody car drivers, they are what kills most bikers, safe in their little tin shed, radio blaring (or tv), cigarette in hands, talking to their buddy - yep, us bikers suffer the results.

I have my own theory why they do not see you based on observations over the years where I have lost a headlight in the car (before it is replaced). In the dark drivers expect to see two lights horizontally across the road as they approach. We need a psychologist here, but one light does not register in their minds as a vehicle, try blanking one of your car headlights out and notice the late reactions.

Wondered where you were, sorry to hear that but predictable, told you not to buy a new bike, to every new rider out there it is highly likely you will have an incident or drop it in the first couple of years, buy a cheap used bike. I wasn't as lucky as you, but one piece of advice I learned over 45 years in the saddle, they struggle to see you in broad daylight think how much this is increased in the dark or poor weather.

Have they recently banned you from Twitter

Cos we have f..k all else to do

Kinky I've tried out the window but never thought of the sink, does it hurt?

He got it cheap when we left the EU, it can't go back.

True Story My eldest son when he lived here was returning from the pub well oiled one night, turning the corner he was confronted by four ponies grazing on my lawn. (escaped from local field). He stood swaying ,gazing at them for a while, then he pressed the bell and when I answered the door his words were :- 'Dad I think we've got rats' ??

Must be Thursday ???

URGENT mines full

Beware the voyeur

Cannon ?? we can't have catapults with the present pussies

Shiver me timbers, aaaaar, mooring ropes dear boy, anchor lines are connected to anchors not bollards, looks wider than a narrow boat ,so which canals are you limited to? For strangers the UK is riddled with canals post industrial revolution (yes we were the first), there was no standardisation of canals for width and depth (or length of locks come to that}. Consequently boats are of different sizes, narrowboats are VERY narrow, canals are mostly leisure and for you visitors a great way to see the country but research needed. The Caledonian canal is spectacular, I have done it both ways.

I watch all the off grid programmes on tv and all have the same problem, old age, not so great when you're old, but enjoy it while you can. My favourite is the old guy on the Alaska trains programme with one eye and a hook on the stump where he shot his own hand off, that is one tough dude. But you can sense that he is coming to the point where he gives up or dies because of lack of medical attention. Due to house prices a lot of people are living on houseboats, but costs are rising as it is becoming more popular. There is very little free land to purchase in the UK, and even when you do there will be a thousand laws to contend with. You cannot really legally live off the land for meat and fish supplies unless you have enough for a smallholding. The UK weather is not great for solar energy and there aren't many other alternatives. So although you can live outside of the mainstream it is actually difficult, as you cannot truly live off the land you are forced into earning money somewhere. My pimping empire hasn't so far strayed into rentboys, but if you're interested and at the 'bottom' of your savings I'm sure a few Tinder contacts can earn us both a few bob, especially when you mention turd drying ? We can get guys who will bend over backwards to help you, do you have a tight pair of jeans for the advert? How about a picture of the way into the boat's bathroom with 'Grab the taps' or glueing a gold sovereign to the galley floor? leave it to Rob. ps referring to the title we can include AC/DC - 'I plug into anything' ?

Now just hold on a minute here ?, just checked and at this time of year the sunrise is around 0830 ? your camera got night vision lol? I'll bet he lives in a high rise apartment and the 'bio fuels' are the neighbours cannabis crops.

Told you, Rob's started a civil war ?

Now now boys I didn't wish to start a civil war in Canada about eco friendly farts, reminds me of my honeymoon when my by now wife found out about what a 'lie in' really means with a man. We dry out and sell in pellet form our waste products as fertiliser in the UK, hence the saying by the French about British food 'tastes like shit', news for you boys those pellets ain't gravy granules.

No, but they do a good breakfast Me pedantic ? lmfao What type of bio fuel? do you dry out your turds?