RobMc

I don't watch TV

Yea, better Covid than watching F1 ?

We have gone from this being local to nationwide with the threat of troops to enforce it if necessary, people totally mixed up about the rules, which seem to change every few days, our country will not recover after a second closure for many years, sad for the young people.

Now I know you're a true Aussie, but the rest of us in the western world don't classify roadkill as 'free meat' ?

He's on a diet remember, only one cow a day

How come this non member has awards??

Well now that you mention it pullets are well known to transmit the disease

Is Harry goosing Rosie ????

No problem FU ?

You wouldn't be putting any in then ?

I surrender

You sure you,re playing on the right servers lol?

Ok for you non engine boys, big ends are the bottom end of the con rod at the crankshaft, when they go the engine has a deep knocking noise, hence big hens.

@WeednFeed reminded me of a joke with his new chickens A salesman is rushing through the Irish countryside in his BMW, headed for an important meeting he must not miss in Dublin. About a hundred miles from Dublin, in the middle of nowhere, he breaks down (nothing new there BMW), he walks into the nearest village for help. Approaching the first person he sees he says 'Is there a garage round here?' 'No', replies the local, 'nearest one is 50 miles away' 'Any taxis or hire cars' asks the salesman 'No, nothing like that round here, but FitzPatrick up the road sometimes has a few old cars in his field' replies the local 'He might be able to help you' So the salesman walks up to FitzPatricks farm, upon arrival he asks if he has any cars for sale or hire? 'Sorry' replies FitzPatrick 'but if you want it you can have that' and he points to a rickety old Wild West stagecoach 'I suppose so' says the salesman 'Do you have any horses to pull it?' 'Sorry' replies FitzPatrick 'ate them all last winter, but Seamus on the next farm grows these giant pullets, he might sell you a few' With great misgivings he approaches Seamus's farm, but lo and behold it's full of giant pullets, which Seamus says are 67 bhp each, so he buys 6. He hitches them up and gets out on the road, the stagecoach is flying along, on a straight stretch he cracks his whip and nearly flies off the back, it's doing over 130 mph and accelerating. He reaches Dublin in no time and comes across his first red light, straining to hold back the pullets. Then alongside pulls a Ferrari, the driver looks on with amazement at the sight beside him, waiting for the lights he revs his engine and slips his clutch. The salesman glances down and smiles, I'll give this cunt a shock he says, the lights go green he cracks his whip and the harness snaps, the pullets and Ferrari disappear into the distance and he's left there. A policeman witnessing this walks up 'What is the trouble sir?' he asks The salesman replies 'Sorry officer, my big hens have gone' ONLY TO BE READ BY UK EYES FFS , NOTE YOU NEED A KNOWLEDGE OF ENGINES AND EXPERIENCE OF WORDPLAY, NOT FOR THOSE WHO THINK SESAME STREET IS ADULT HUMOUR.

I think I'm ahead of the competition lol.

Eat healthier food?

Wtf is that in your mouth Yacc a trumpet ? ?

Oh forgot to mention, although you can't visit or talk to in the street any family member not in your household, nor friend nor neighbour, you're fine to go grouse shooting or the casino, gives a good idea of who is making the rules eh?

We were making the rice pudding for after Sunday dinner and the wife says 'put a knob of butter in', then goes off it when I begin to carve the butter to the appropriate shape, be more specific girls?.

What Shiny says is right, you can't have a family Christmas dinner legally, unless you all go to the pub - that's legal, but when in the pub you must only 'socialise' with your own bubble ?? see how that goes with Aunty Marge after 3 gins ? Don't worry Funky cos we're not going to give a f..k either, the madness lives on. The real sad fact is that there are hardly any pubs left now, but you get served really quickly if you cough, get your meals free by asking for the mustard then telling the waiter you can't smell it or taste it, can't get you out the door quick enough.

The Government have just imposed new lockdown laws in my area (despite it not being too bad, but as a precaution) and I sense the peoples sense of reality leaving them, we are moving into a surreal world in experts minds (they never obey them of course). See if this makes sense to the rest of you. The new rules ban people from meeting with others from outside of their own households or support bubbles in private homes and gardens, unless for specific purposes listed below. A support bubble allows a single-adult household to join with one other household of any size. Residents are also advised not to socialise with other people outside of their own households or bubbles in all public venues. People can only come inside your home for these specific purposes: where everyone in the gathering lives together or is in the same support bubble; to attend a birth at the mother’s request; to visit a person who is dying; to fulfil a legal obligation; for work purposes, including repairs and other building work, or for the provision of voluntary or charitable services; for the purposes of education or training; for the purposes of childcare provided by a registered provider; to provide emergency assistance; to enable one or more persons in the gathering to avoid injury or illness or to escape a risk of harm; to facilitate a house move; to provide care or assistance to a vulnerable person; to continue existing arrangements for access to, and contact between, parents and children where the children do not live in the same household as their parents, or one of their parents. BUT, you can still go to pubs and restaurants ?? All above enforceable by fines, you are encouraged to 'grass' on neighbours breaking the rules (I'd grass on the lot if there was a reward lol), the big plus side is that you cannot visit your children or grandchildren or anyone else unless it's at the pub, at last a return to gin palaces, drunkenness and debauchery, been waiting all my life. Now wtf a 'support bubble' is escapes me, unless it is some sort of support given to get you home after the pub, good idea. Needless to say the general opinion of the public is music to idiots ears, as one they are saying FU, big brother is definitely here for good.

You guys have parents ????

That's no way to talk about our Rosie Key ?????? ?

Wtf are you on for that pain Rosie ???

Photoshop ? ????