Janey Posted March 22, 2011 Member ID: 434 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 58 Topic Count: 272 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 1289 Content Per Day: 0.24 Reputation: 1448 Achievement Points: 12930 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 09/17/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: May 8 Device: Windows Share Posted March 22, 2011 I'm trying to come out of "hermit-mode" and thought I would share what is in my mind/heart with y'all as I feel that this is a safe environment and consider many of you my friends. As some of you may know, I went through a bad break up over the holidays which wrecked my personal life and left me semi-homeless (I've been crashing at my son's apt until I can afford a place). I've had some severe depression about it and tend to hide myself away when my world has too much drama/pain/disappointment to deal with. My family doctor prescribed and I've been taking anti-depressants and xanax since Hurricane Katrina, but sometimes they don't "anti" enough. It's difficult for me to reach out to others in an honest way and I tend to skim the surface with superfluous topics of conversation, hence my chatter. When stressed, I can (and sometimes do) talk a lot without really saying anything. It's an embarrassing unconscious defense mechanism that gives me the appearance of being irresponsible and frivolous which creates an atmosphere in which I am not required to be a responsible participant. For being absent, I apologize. I have stopped crying over Vic and have several interviews set up for jobs that are actually in my field. I survived abuse, cancer, Katrina and I will survive this. I will get back on track. Thank you for “listening”. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
SGTDANKO Posted March 22, 2011 Member ID: 3214 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 27 Topic Count: 206 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 2362 Content Per Day: 0.53 Reputation: 50 Achievement Points: 14004 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 02/21/12 Status: Offline Last Seen: July 4, 2015 Birthday: 06/23/1981 Share Posted March 22, 2011 thats why we are here it will get better for you and i hope for the best . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HarryWeezer Posted March 22, 2011 Member ID: 20166 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 40 Topic Count: 611 Topics Per Day: 0.16 Content Count: 7653 Content Per Day: 1.97 Reputation: 7228 Achievement Points: 53668 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 36 Joined: 10/04/13 Status: Offline Last Seen: Monday at 02:23 PM Birthday: 10/16/1946 Device: Windows Share Posted March 22, 2011 Never give up; always keep on focus. You WILL get past this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Bosun Posted March 22, 2011 Member ID: 1445 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 14 Topic Count: 31 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 721 Content Per Day: 0.14 Reputation: 1366 Achievement Points: 5571 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 3 Joined: 05/25/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: Thursday at 01:46 AM Birthday: 01/23/1963 Device: Windows Share Posted March 22, 2011 Hi Janey, I'm only new to the Clan and don't know you that well yet but here are some thoughts. Just to qualify my comments a little, I have been separated/divorced since Xmas Eve 1993... What you are describing seems to be a normal reaction to a major life change, and the good part about it is that you are recognising what your reaction to stress is. It is much healthier for you to chatter on about nothing as a stress reaction than chosing to consume excess alcohol or drugs etc. From personal experience (myself and close friends) what I would suggest is to start doing some regular exercise and make sure you are looking after your diet which should help with the stress. The other REALLY important thing is to accept that you are going to have ups and downs, good days and bad days (but things will overall get better). Have you thought about trying to slowly give up the medication? Good luck with the job hunting, and DON'T stress if you don't get the first one! Cheers Bosun Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Angel Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 46 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 104 Topic Count: 132 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 4316 Content Per Day: 0.80 Reputation: 2955 Achievement Points: 34774 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 11 Joined: 09/01/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: September 18, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2011 Dont know u very well either other than a few times in the games but I have been there girl....it gets alot better but before it does, u have to get back to life. Its wonderful....I started off my going and changing myself lil by lil....I started walkin everyday and its giving me exercise but just being outside is a great feeling...second u come across people and slowly make friends that way. I have one lady that when I go walk around the lake, we walk together, some days I just walk in my yard but its nice to get out. Second and this I had to learn the hard way...u gotta start living and loving ur life. Ur special, everyone is in their own way and some guy will find it and u will be happier than ever before. Just takes time. I have lived that, I am so happy now, I honestly never thought after my last relationship I could ever be happy again but MY Vic, not the same one she was talkin about lol, has showed me what a man and his love is all about. So just take ur time and get to living again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigPapaDean Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 1128 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 78 Topic Count: 1200 Topics Per Day: 0.23 Content Count: 6529 Content Per Day: 1.25 Reputation: 4411 Achievement Points: 63453 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 6 Joined: 02/13/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: Yesterday at 06:24 AM Birthday: 10/21/1954 Device: Windows Share Posted March 23, 2011 Janey, I am a former pastor and I was at the top of the penticle when it all came tumbling down at my feet. There are so many things I did to hide myself and I retired and seem to venture to the spiritual side of life. I knew what was wrong and had suicidal thoughts and all and even my kids who lived with me at the time didnt know until I was brave enough to call a family meetin g and simply tell them their "Dad: as they always knew him was in big trouble and could they please help me through this situation. I had my Dr put me on Prozac(I hope thats speeled right). After much therape and love and prayers from family and friends I am much better but still have up days and down days! My life for the most part is beginning to slowly look bright again. After my marriage broke up I thought I'd never meet any body again to love me for me, but guss what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
BigPapaDean Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 1128 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 78 Topic Count: 1200 Topics Per Day: 0.23 Content Count: 6529 Content Per Day: 1.25 Reputation: 4411 Achievement Points: 63453 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 6 Joined: 02/13/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: Yesterday at 06:24 AM Birthday: 10/21/1954 Device: Windows Share Posted March 23, 2011 (Dont know what happened but it posted by it self) Anyway I did meet a beautiful woman who loves me much more than I knew was possible! Janey I know life looks pretty damned bleak at times but hang in there and trust me it does come back to you! Better than you even dream it could be! You need a shoulder? I have a very good listenin g heart and everything stays here . Just offering. My XFIRE is bigmeandean> Should you need to buzz me! I feel your struggles girl! God does care about YOU! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
NickTheGrip Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 177 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 16 Topic Count: 145 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 1669 Content Per Day: 0.31 Reputation: 281 Achievement Points: 10581 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 1 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: June 27, 2023 Birthday: 05/08/1961 Device: iPhone Share Posted March 23, 2011 Janey I really don't know you yet as we move in different circles (read servers) but please let me say a couple of things to add to the great advice above. These situations are meant to test us. Like Bosun said, just the fact that you can recognize your plight is amazing. So many people who have gone through what you have gone through simply give up and fall into the abyss of despair. Trust me, the further you fall, the harder it is to climb out so you are off to a great start. I am not a believer in medication as I think sometimes it makes things worse, but that is my opinion, nothing more. I would suggest walking as an exercise option. The fresh air is wonderful and the light exercise makes all the difference. Try to walk away from civilization and be around peace and quiet. It helps you realize that no matter what happens life goes on. Like you say, you have kicked abuse's ass, handed cancer's to him on plate and beat down that bitch Katrina so in my book you are one tough lady. The job will come and when it does it will be the right one. Keep your chin up and remember your XI dysfunctional family is always here if you need to vent. Kick Ass Girl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Damage_inc- Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 2048 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 294 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 6689 Content Per Day: 1.36 Reputation: 4709 Achievement Points: 48999 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 12/15/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 29, 2023 Birthday: 05/30/1967 Device: Windows Share Posted March 23, 2011 I hope things get better .I really beleive .What doesnt kill you makes you stronger.You will get past this.You have to keep yourself busy and focused.What really works is creating a list of things you want to accomplish. #1 resume- job.savings/apartment /etc....self improvement...excercise -take time for yourself-you will fell better too...freinds first -the kind that make you feel positive and dont bring you down...love later after stability...etc....good luck.Always think things could always be worse ...You are a survivor and you are very fortunate to have been given a second and third chance.gl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
FRENCHI Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 1729 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 105 Topic Count: 279 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 7521 Content Per Day: 1.50 Reputation: 3632 Achievement Points: 49200 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 2 Joined: 08/23/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: September 16, 2021 Birthday: 12/26/1969 Share Posted March 23, 2011 BONJOUR JANEY bon courage a vous et merci pour votre mot ( donnée de vos nouvelle ) . Espéron avoir de vos nouvelles bientot . ET heureux de vous s avoir en vie et espéré passé un peut de temps avec vous sur les serveurs xi a trés bientot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Mad Cow Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 1073 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 10 Topic Count: 8 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 280 Content Per Day: 0.05 Reputation: 10 Achievement Points: 1611 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 01/31/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: February 2, 2019 Birthday: 09/28/1975 Share Posted March 23, 2011 What a great attitude, Janey! You are exactly right, you WILL make it through this too. I am happy you can share the trials and tribulations with us....we all have them to some degree. That is what makes this place so desirable to be a part of. Keep us posted, we'll be prayin' for ya! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boomer Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 2083 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 42 Topic Count: 172 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3554 Content Per Day: 0.73 Reputation: 4992 Achievement Points: 23761 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 6 Joined: 12/31/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: May 14, 2014 Birthday: 10/20/1962 Share Posted March 23, 2011 What a freaking great group of people in this clan! Hearts are pouring out top notch thoughts and feelings here!!!!!!!!!! Janey, No matter what, as you already know, yes you will get through this. It's nothing more than a bump in the road and how many bumps have you gone over in your life? Nothing in life happens without purpose and cause, this just makes the heart stronger even though it doesn't feel that way at the moment while your heart is breaking and the lack of understanding why this could happen to you. Like several others here, I have only seen and spoken with you once or twice, but everything will be ok! Just a semi quick thought for you to ponder on for a while: So many people ask God why Lord why, what did I do to deserve this, why did you let this happen to me? Well he didn't, but He'll be there for you if you open your heart and allow Him to come in and heal you. The bible says as you know, He gave His only begotten Son to die for the sins of mankind, it also says be not dismayed do not worry about tomorrow for it may not be here! And did He not cloth the lilies in the field, provide food and shelter for all things? Your like a tree thats been uprooted, trees are strong and they bend with the winds, but now that your roots are exposed to the air you think you will or feel like your dying, that just means its time to move over and on and sink your roots beside the Living Waters that give life everlasting to us all. So, just take things oneday at a time, screw tomorrow, hold your head up high wipe the tears from your eyes, take a deep breath hold it a for a second let it out slow, and when you do that, its time to move on, and trust me I know what I'm saying! None of us are prefect especially me, so we do the best we can, and remember we all fall short of the Glory of God, nothing you've done or anything you do, will take His Love away from you! Think about what we All have said, cya around the battle field girl! Come and play with us, you won't be able to keep your mind on harmful things. We love you, We are Family! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boomer Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 2083 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 42 Topic Count: 172 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3554 Content Per Day: 0.73 Reputation: 4992 Achievement Points: 23761 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 6 Joined: 12/31/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: May 14, 2014 Birthday: 10/20/1962 Share Posted March 23, 2011 ok I wasn't gonna do this, but I truly feel the need to share this with Janey! And I know there are others from our family that need this too! Its called:Come To Me COME TO ME WHEN YOU ARE HURTING, come to me AND I WILL BIND YOUR WOUNDS. WHEN YOU NEED TO BE ASSURED, come to me AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY EMBRACE. WHEN YOU CAN NO LONGER GO ON, come to me AND I WILL CARRY YOU. WHEN YOU NEED COMFORT, come to me AND I WILL WIPE YOUR TEARS. WHEN YOU ARE UNCERTAIN OF MY LOVE, come to me AND I WILL SPEAK MY HEART TO YOU. ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT IN YOUR NEED YOU ARE COMING TO THE ONE WHO CAME FOR YOU. This was written by Roy Lessen and it speaks more than any words we have to say to each other, because this was taken and written from though out the Word of God! You guys do realize that Angels weep with us? But they also Rejoice with us! Thanks for your time, Boomer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hunter1948 Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 1850 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 98 Topic Count: 328 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 8620 Content Per Day: 1.73 Reputation: 4222 Achievement Points: 55994 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 09/29/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 29, 2023 Birthday: 06/19/1948 Device: Windows Share Posted March 23, 2011 You can do it girl. Many of us have gone through this and time does heal. I for one went through it and it turned out better than ever for me and my wife now for 19 years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Janey Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 434 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 58 Topic Count: 272 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 1289 Content Per Day: 0.24 Reputation: 1448 Achievement Points: 12930 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 09/17/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: May 8 Device: Windows Author Share Posted March 23, 2011 Reading your replies to my post has brought tears to my eyes. Thank you all for being such kind and supportive people. I have started filtering the people in my (real) life and am removing the ones who are negative influences and down right cruel. I even had brunch with an old friend and we went to sit by the river and talk... it helped. Thank you all for letting me in this clan. It's the only one I ever want to be in. I love you all. et à Frenchi,Je vous remercie pour vos aimables paroles. La vie n'est pas très confortable pour moi comme ça, mais en sachant que j'ai non seulement un merveilleux groupe de personnes pour parler avec (et pratiquer le français avec) rend les choses supportables.(je n'écris pas bien le français, mais j'apprends à parler français.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Angel Posted March 23, 2011 Member ID: 46 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 104 Topic Count: 132 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 4316 Content Per Day: 0.80 Reputation: 2955 Achievement Points: 34774 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 11 Joined: 09/01/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: September 18, 2021 Share Posted March 23, 2011 Thats a great start Janey....keep it up girl. Hit me up anytime on xfire if u need to have some girl talk. runawayangel98 is my xfire. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wonko Posted March 26, 2011 Member ID: 1023 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 0 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 9 Content Per Day: 0.00 Reputation: 0 Achievement Points: 65 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 01/15/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 16, 2018 Birthday: 01/01/1970 Share Posted March 26, 2011 I only played with you a couple times, but I just wanted to say good job! Back in 1997 I was in a bad car accident that changed my life, now I could have sat around and cried all day but I got up off my ass and figured out how to make a new life for myself. From the way you write I can see that you're like me, a survivor, a person who smacks life back when it smacks us down! I'd put good money up that you'll end up better than ever and thumbing your nose at the chumps! Just remember, the red badge of courage leaves a scar behind as a medal. Treasure the bad memories as much as the good ones because they're the ones that make us stronger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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