So we were sitting down to dinner tonight and I heard some racket on my roof. Already dark here but I went out with my .45 in hand to find some damned fool screwing around with my chimney - a burglar, I first thought, since he had a sack slung over his shoulder to put all our silverware and electronic devices in.
So I said "who the hell are you and what the fuck are you doing on my roof?" The asshole said something like "Hore hore hore" and it became clear to me at that point that this jerk not only didn't speak English, but was probably an Al Qaeda operative with a bomb in his sack, bent on bringing terrorism right to my living room. He was wearing some kind of disguise - white face mask and red hoodie.
To hell with that shit - I put one round right in his ass. Near as I could tell, he had some kind of stealth rocket sled parked right there on my roof and crawled over to it and off he went, probably looking for some more hores.
I heard his exclaim as he sailed out of sight ,
that he wished to hell he had stayed home tonight.
Thank God we live in America where he have the right to bear arms.