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Nine Terms Women Use


HellKid

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NINE TERMS WOMEN USE

 

 

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

 

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

 

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

 

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare not permission. Don't Do It!

 

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

 

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

 

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you do not question or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome'. that will bring on a 'whatever').

 

(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F--- YOU!

 

(9) Don't worry about it=2C I got it: Another dangerous statement meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

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very (sadly) true

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Here's a handy cross reference for all you blokes out there

 

What they say What they mean

We need...................................................... I want

It's your decision...........................................The correct decision should be obvious by now

Do what you want..........................................You'll pay for this later

We need to talk.............................................You need to listen

Sure, go ahead.............................................No, I don't want you to

I'm not upset.................................................Of course I am upset, you moron

You're so...manly..........................................You need a shave and you sweat a lot

You're certainly attentive tonight...................Is sex all you ever think about?

I'm not emotional and I am not overreacting..I am on my period

I heard a noise..............................................I noticed you were almost asleep before me

Do you love me?...........................................I want to buy something expensive and unnecessary

How much do you love me?..........................I already bought it

I'll be ready in a minute.................................Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV. You will get to see it all except the last 5 minutes

You have to learn to communicate................Just agree with me

Yes................................................................No

No..................................................................No

Maybe............................................................No

I'm sorry.........................................................You will be so sorry

I'm not yelling.................................................I am yelling because you are not agreeing with me

 

And the answer to the question "What's wrong?"

 

The same old thing...........................................Nothing

Nothing.............................................................Everything

Everything........................................................I have PMS

Nothing, really..................................................God you are an asshole

I don't want to talk about it ...............................Go away, I am building up evidence against you

Can we just be friends......................................No way I am ever having sex with you again, ever

I need some space..............................................without you in it

Do I look fat in this dress..................................We are overdue for a fight

No, pizza is.....fine.............................................Cheap bastard

I don't know, what do you want to do?...............I can't believe you have nothing planned

I like you, but.....................................................I hate you

You never listen................................................You never listen

Oh, yes, right there...........................................Well, it's close, but I want to get this over with

I'm going out with the girls.................................We are going to get drunk and make fun of you

There's no one else..........................................I am doing your brother, and his friend

Size doesn't count.............................................Unless I actually want an orgasm this time

Edited by NickTheGrip
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Yep all true LOL :harhar:

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omfg they dont teach stuff this good at marriage consuling!!!!!!!!!

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great post.... very very very very very very true.

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I think I'v heard all of them one time or another. LOL

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