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icequeenherb

Eastcoast and his Emu

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I'm beginning to get the idea the 'split' wasn't smooth ?? 

Man wakes up in the morning and looks across the bed and his wifes face is ravaged, with two black eyes

What happened to you he says?

This is the result of ten cans of beer, she replies

That's funny, he said, I had ten cans last night and I'm ok ???

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7 hours ago, RobMc said:

I'm beginning to get the idea the 'split' wasn't smooth ?? 

Man wakes up in the morning and looks across the bed and his wifes face is ravaged, with two black eyes

What happened to you he says?

This is the result of ten cans of beer, she replies

That's funny, he said, I had ten cans last night and I'm ok ???

Nah.... It's all good. Friends who enjoy giving each other. Lol 

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5 hours ago, EastCoast50 said:

Rumor has it Mr. Wick has a $50K bounty on her ass. Donations being accepted on GoFundMe.

Ha. That literally makes no sense but still lol

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@icequeenherb (Can't call you "Sweet Ice Cream," aka @Icequeen, 'cause I already have one--sorry.), the pic you posted looks like a close-up of my buddy, @TBB.

Looks like he got lotsa rest the night earlier.

Lol.

Hey @EastCoast50--"Hell hath no fury like a scorned-ass woman."

True, dat.

Ayaq

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On 6/13/2018 at 3:40 PM, icequeenherb said:

Awesome. What days? I will be around. I doubt @EastCoast50Will meet for a beer. He'll have some excuse. #pussy.  Haha

Ill be there Monday afternoon, through Thursday.  PM me Ill give you the details!

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On 6/13/2018 at 10:30 AM, spinpuppy said:

Coast, Herb...will be in Gettysburg next week

Yeah. Sorry I missed it. Working midnights.

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On 6/13/2018 at 4:07 PM, AyaqGuyaq said:

@icequeenherb (Can't call you "Sweet Ice Cream," aka @Icequeen, 'cause I already have one--sorry.), the pic you posted looks like a close-up of my buddy, @TBB.

Looks like he got lotsa rest the night earlier.

Lol.

Hey @EastCoast50--"Hell hath no fury like a scorned-ass woman."

True, dat.

Ayaq

Word.

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On ‎7‎/‎1‎/‎2018 at 9:15 AM, EastCoast50 said:

Yeah. Sorry I missed it. Working midnights.

Working the streets at midnight?

The "50" in "EastCoast50" must be a price point for certain "services rendered," I'm guessing.  You know, kinda like "AroundTheWorld100," or "HandJob20."

Sorry, snickering at my genius now.

LMAO.

@spinpuppy, try the corner of Elm and 54th street at midnight next time.  Look for the blonde-wig-donning, green-mini-dress-bearing, red-stiletto-wearing, hairy-legged "worker" stumbling around the cobble-stoned streets about that time.

@TBBcan send you the GPS coordinates, if need be.

@bds1961 has some "frequent flyer" coupons that will be surely honored.

Watch out for Run D.M.C. with his new infrared video camera hiding in in the bushes smoking his hukkah, though, for you are sure to gain infamy on the world-wide web.

Lol.

Ayaq

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Ayaq my boy (presume you are a boy?) how are you? thought you'd been out trapping as we hadn't heard from you for a while. Lay in bed this morning watching the last alaskans and thought of the dangers you face everyday, you must be a real man to live up there? (you are a man?)

It came as a surprise to see you know so much about illicit sexual encounters, even the street names, but we understand that you need a change now and again from your moose friend. Do you have a blond wig for her? send us a picture.

I think you have it wrong, I don't smoke and have never been with a 'hukkah' in my life, in fact I am so unnatractive to girls when I say Alexa she replies 'I already have a boyfriend'? bitch.

How is the book going?

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12 hours ago, RobMc said:

Ayaq my boy (presume you are a boy?) how are you? thought you'd been out trapping as we hadn't heard from you for a while. Lay in bed this morning watching the last alaskans and thought of the dangers you face everyday, you must be a real man to live up there? (you are a man?)

It came as a surprise to see you know so much about illicit sexual encounters, even the street names, but we understand that you need a change now and again from your moose friend. Do you have a blond wig for her? send us a picture.

I think you have it wrong, I don't smoke and have never been with a 'hukkah' in my life, in fact I am so unnatractive to girls when I say Alexa she replies 'I already have a boyfriend'? bitch.

How is the book going?

Just got back from commercial salmon fishing in Bristol Bay, Alaska, for two weeks.

I would still be out there, but I fell backwards into a fish "hold" and almost broke my neck.  Had a spinal x-ray yesterday, as well as a "head-to-ass" Cat-Scan.

Thankfully, nothing broken, just a concussion and a sore-ass spinal column, from neck to bottom (literally).

The doctor signed a form saying I shouldn't fish for two weeks, and should rest and avoid exertion--even mental exertion.

So, coming up with my witty quips and cleverly-cloaked insults is even on the "No-no" list.

Did okay, though--made about $3,000 (U.S.) on one good delivery, alone (about 15,000 pounds of sockeye salmon).  The tenders are paying nearly $2.00 per pound, brought on by the crash of the Cordova and Chignik salmon returns.

We use gillnets (as opposed to seines), so my back and fingers got one heckuva workout.  I've lost 20 pounds, and I feel like I can crush  steel.

I wasn't planning on fishing, but my life-long buddy came to me two weeks ago and said one of his deckhands quit; he was heading out on the out-going tide to another fishing district and needed help, so I threw some clothes and toiletries into a bag, grabbed my boots and raingear, and took off.

That's I've been eerily silent, mi amour.  Mon Ami?

@FRENCHI, how do you say "Good Buddy" in your native tongue (pronounced "tung-guh")?

Good to back on solid ground, though, even though I'm missing out on some serious cash.

After being on the water for two weeks, my sense of balance is still askew, and the floor seems to be wave-like--inner ear is so used to the rocking.

I wished I brought my cell phone,  because we travelled in some 10-foot seas that woulda made land lubbers seasick.

I'm a-gonna buy a new laptop so I can continue my prose.  I'm also a-gonna get my business license so I can start my consulting business.

Gotta finish healing and get paid first . . .

Good to be back, buddy.

Ayaq

Edited by AyaqGuyaq
Left out Frenchi.

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What a man, I knew you'd be up to some adventure or other, yet another string to your bow, fishing eh? I watch that programme where they sail for the crab from Dutch Harbour. Quite where you pluck the courage to do these adventures I cannot imagine.

I too was a bit unsteady on my feet last night, but we'll not go there?, it must have been in sympathy with you my brave buddy. I too have been busy, and have almost finished crotcheting a new table mat, in extreme conditions, I had run out of milk for my tea, we are truly brothers.

Heal well my brave boy, be ready for that next challenge .

ps Thanks for the warning about a forthcoming salmon shortage, I've ordered an extra tin of pink (can't afford red) on this weeks shopping when my butler goes out. Is this insider dealing?.

Edited by RobMc

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10 hours ago, AyaqGuyaq said:

Je reviens tout juste de la pêche commerciale au saumon dans la baie de Bristol, en Alaska, pendant deux semaines.

Je serais toujours là-bas, mais je suis tombé en arrière dans un poisson "tenir" et presque cassé mon cou. J'ai eu une radiographie de la colonne vertébrale hier, ainsi qu'un scanner de la tête à l'autre.

Heureusement, rien de cassé, juste une commotion cérébrale et une colonne vertébrale douloureuse, du cou au bas (littéralement).

Le médecin a signé un formulaire disant que je ne devrais pas pêcher pendant deux semaines, et que je devrais me reposer et éviter les efforts, même les efforts psychologiques.

Donc, venir avec mes quolibets spirituels et les insultes habilement masquées est même sur la liste "Non-non".

Est-ce que ça va, cependant, a coûté environ 3 000 $ (É.-U.) pour une seule bonne livraison, à elle seule (environ 15 000 livres de saumon sockeye). Les offres paient près de 2,00 $ la livre, provoquées par le crash des retours de saumons de Cordoue et de Chignik.

Nous utilisons des filets maillants (par opposition aux sennes), donc mon dos et mes doigts ont eu une séance d'entraînement heckuva. J'ai perdu 20 livres et j'ai l'impression de pouvoir écraser l'acier.

Je n'avais pas l'intention de pêcher, mais mon copain de longue date est venu me voir il y a deux semaines et m'a dit que l'un de ses matelots avait démissionné; il se dirigeait vers la marée montante vers un autre district de pêche et avait besoin d'aide, alors j'ai jeté des vêtements et des articles de toilette dans un sac, j'ai attrapé mes bottes et mon raidear et j'ai décollé.

C'est que j'ai été étrangement silencieux, mi amour. Mon ami?

@FRENCHI , comment dites-vous "Good Buddy" dans votre langue maternelle (prononcé "tung-guh")?

C'est bon de revenir sur des bases solides, même si je manque de l'argent sérieux.

Après avoir été sur l'eau pendant deux semaines, mon sens de l'équilibre est toujours asymétrique, et le sol semble être comme une vague - l'oreille interne est tellement habituée au balancement.

J'aurais aimé avoir mon téléphone portable, car nous avons voyagé dans des mers de 10 pieds qui auraient fait un mal de terre.

Je vais acheter un nouvel ordinateur portable pour continuer ma prose. Je vais aussi obtenir ma licence d'entreprise pour pouvoir démarrer mon activité de conseil.

Je dois finir de guérir et être payé en premier. . .

C'est bon d'être de retour, mon pote.

Ayaq

Good Buddy" : bon copain :)

 

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3 hours ago, RobMc said:

What a man, I knew you'd be up to some adventure or other, yet another string to your bow, fishing eh? I watch that programme where they sail for the crab from Dutch Harbour. Quite where you pluck the courage to do these adventures I cannot imagine.

I too was a bit unsteady on my feet last night, but we'll not go there?, it must have been in sympathy with you my brave buddy. I too have been busy, and have almost finished crotcheting a new table mat, in extreme conditions, I had run out of milk for my tea, we are truly brothers.

Heal well my brave boy, be ready for that next challenge .

ps Thanks for the warning about a forthcoming salmon shortage, I've ordered an extra tin of pink (can't afford red) on this weeks shopping when my butler goes out. Is this insider dealing?.

Laughing my frickin' arse off, buddy!

Maybe my next book (after I finish the Sasquatch book) will be memoirs of all the times I've come close to dying while commercial salmon fishing . . .

This latest occurrence (sadly) isn't the first time I've almost broken my neck.  I've almost gotten crushed, almost fell overboard in rough seas--at night--countless times, almost had systemic fish poisoning a few times, almost got some ladies pregnant while on the boat--wait, how'd that sneak in there?

Lol.  My older brother (the one that passed away, and the one from which I've adopted the moniker "Ayaq Guyaq") was saddled with child support payments for much of his life, so I was always careful.  When we were in harbor, the bunks in my Dad's fishing boat saw "lots of action," if you will.  But, I always had more than one raincoat on board . . .

The bench seat of Dad's 1982 Ford Pick-Up saw lots of action, too.  'Nuther story.

I'm just glad I can walk.

As I lay at the bottom of the fish hold, lying flat on my back with my legs stretched vertically against the fishing-hold wall, I remember thinking "I think God is telling me to get offa this boat."

True story.  I gotta see my daughter again.  I'd like to fly with her and my son back to Indianapolis, Indiana before he starts his junior year at Indiana University.  He's a Hoosier.

No, not "Hoser."

Lol.

Are you using a double-stitch on your table mat?

Yeah, you better stock up on canned salmon (though the ones we catch are "flash frozen" and sold as fillets--more money for the company, you know) because it will likely be last year's catch.

And canned sockeye ("red") salmon costs about 2.5 times more than pinks ("humpies").

Chinook salmon are called "kings," Cohoe salmon are called "silvers," and Chum salmon are called "dogs."

You can guess which of the five salmon species we harvest are the cheapest.

Thanks for the well-wishes, buddy.

Thank the Good Lord I'm able to type that to you.

A still-hurting "lol" to you, kind sir.

Ayaq

 

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Got some ladies pregnant on the fishing boat eh? I've heard of desperate fisherman nailing skate to the mast for 'relaxation', makes a change I suppose from your female moose companion, do you take the blond wig? Up here on the Scottish borders luckily theres a limitless supply of sheep, if you ever visit.

The butler just returned with two tins of skinless and boneless pink salmon, the Rolls will stink, does the man think I'm made of money? Said it was a bogof, certainly smells like it.

Hope you recover soon, I shan't sleep tonight with the picture of you lying on your back with your legs in the air, if you need some tips the XI ladies would be glad to help I'm sure.

Must dash have some idiots to kill.

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On 13/07/2018 at 10:04 AM, AyaqGuyaq said:

Laughing my frickin' arse off, buddy!

Maybe my next book (after I finish the Sasquatch book) will be memoirs of all the times I've come close to dying while commercial salmon fishing . . .

This latest occurrence (sadly) isn't the first time I've almost broken my neck.  I've almost gotten crushed, almost fell overboard in rough seas--at night--countless times, almost had systemic fish poisoning a few times, almost got some ladies pregnant while on the boat--wait, how'd that sneak in there?

Lol.  My older brother (the one that passed away, and the one from which I've adopted the moniker "Ayaq Guyaq") was saddled with child support payments for much of his life, so I was always careful.  When we were in harbor, the bunks in my Dad's fishing boat saw "lots of action," if you will.  But, I always had more than one raincoat on board . . .

The bench seat of Dad's 1982 Ford Pick-Up saw lots of action, too.  'Nuther story.

I'm just glad I can walk.

As I lay at the bottom of the fish hold, lying flat on my back with my legs stretched vertically against the fishing-hold wall, I remember thinking "I think God is telling me to get offa this boat."

True story.  I gotta see my daughter again.  I'd like to fly with her and my son back to Indianapolis, Indiana before he starts his junior year at Indiana University.  He's a Hoosier.

No, not "Hoser."

Lol.

Are you using a double-stitch on your table mat?

Yeah, you better stock up on canned salmon (though the ones we catch are "flash frozen" and sold as fillets--more money for the company, you know) because it will likely be last year's catch.

And canned sockeye ("red") salmon costs about 2.5 times more than pinks ("humpies").

Chinook salmon are called "kings," Cohoe salmon are called "silvers," and Chum salmon are called "dogs."

You can guess which of the five salmon species we harvest are the cheapest.

Thanks for the well-wishes, buddy.

Thank the Good Lord I'm able to type that to you.

A still-hurting "lol" to you, kind sir.

Ayaq

 

Ayaq my boy, it came to me this morning in bed, then I had a great idea for the book, you only need to get your pilots licence, I'll bet you have one already my intrepid adventurer. I was lying in bed, watching back to back episodes of the last alaskans and flying wild and thought 'no more canoes', the way forward is to fly to your adventures. Spotted a great buy on an auction site that only required a little glue and a fresh elastic band, we fellow idiots could crowd fund the purchase, I'm sure we could stretch to 50 bucks? Perhaps stretch and elastic bands do not go well together, but fear not, your welfare is paramount.

I got so excited that I dropped a stitch on the fair isle sweater I am knitting for you before the fall, bet you guys in the upper 49th are looking forward to the snows? The other idea I had, whilst doing a particularly tricky knot in macrame, was to bring back live bears (even sasquatch?) instead of shooting them, gives you more of an audience for the books with tree huggers. We could fit a larger passenger seat in the plane, what do you think?

I know you must be working hard on your recovery, but get back to your adventures soon, do you think flying is the way forward ??

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