RobMc

I'm very hurt, I'm going to cry into my hanky and cuddle up to Monkie for support (no tongues mind) you beasts, snowflakes have feelings too ??

That's my middle mouse auto scroll fire finger, and I'd like you to know I got an AA+ rating on @EastCoast50's hygiene course, I failed the second part on a 'punch through' toilet exercise, waiting for a retake when I free the finger from EC, he seems to want to keep it????

Hold on - I'll get my magnifying glass

Ah? any of you remember the old Timmah ??, the wild boy, sex n drugs n rock and roll ? now it's gardening, soon the joints will be swapped for a pipe, slippers and gown bought for evenings listening to classical music in his rocking chair. We all get old buddy just accept it, your bunny hops will stop, your rifle waver and before you know it Budman will be kicking your ass. I never got to the Budman stage but we can swap stories about worms, compost and our favourite pesticides freely in these forums. How about a gardening section to go with shooting and fishing, you can post pictures of your cucumber, but not in mens toilets please.

Ah dear boy - allow me to let you sleep easy, you are quite right of course the comments are far too tame for these forums. Now this is where you kiddies and snowflakes stop reading while I put @Labob to rest. The TD9 rested, shagged out after f.....g up the beautiful forest, it nestled in a hole it had found before it slept, not the hole it originally intended to be in either, someone must have tampered with the fuel? Nothing felt right, everything was soft and floppy, whereas before it rested it was rock hard, pushing those trees aside with ease, it feared it had the caterpillar STD, rampant in North America since being brought from Mexico by @deerejon. No longer was it proud of being as powerful as a French Canadians 'tackle', but salvation was at hand, one day out of nowhere some sad fckrs who had no lives came to rescue him. Firstly they replaced the maple syrup in the tank, then they stimulated him with multiple strokes of his starter, he soon rose to be the dozer he had once been. With a mighty roar he kicked into life, crushing the sad fkrs under his tracks, including @KaptCrunch the man who had devoted hours to their repair. Satisfied he began levelling the trees in all of North America in an orgy of lust, could no one stop him unless they found the correct grade of bacon, the dozers Kryptonite equivalent, can anyone save the trees ????????????? Next chapter @piglo comes to the rescue better @Labob ???

Hell Beers, if you'd said we could have had a whip round to buy you some fresh food ?

I heard they 'let him go' when they found his anchor had 'dropped'

Blame @Icequeen for getting me interested in ploughing

Yea, the initiation ceremony deeply disturbed me, are you sure you are right about your definition of 'pinning the tail on the Donkey ?'

You are correct He has proved to be the greater, by far, of two evils Feel sorry for the USA

Hmmmm? I don't think this translates the way you meant Vincent, unless you are desperate to join the forums perverts club (President @TBB), (Vice President @TBB), (Secretary @TBB), (Treasurer @TBB) and (Publicity Officer @TBB), but if you are give one of them a PM.

Methinks you lead a sad life too Kapt?

About as much in your life as mine buddy eh ???? I got excited too.

At least the video lasted longer than me 'making love'

EC apologises for the inconvenience to all, he was looking for rattlesnakes after a 'heavy session' and mistook the manure pit for his bed.

Shit, how did you get hold of my 'dildo' testing??? That's industrial espionage Budman has a 50% stake, he'll be pissed

It's not easy teaching Basil things is it?

Sorry about the short break Basil, been gargling with bleach after the wife said I had a foul mouth, seems to have worked? Woke is a new method of swindling money on the pretext of racism, colour or privilege (you'll hear this often), Firstly you'll need a source of ready cash, anywhere in North America or Europe are just fine, then a politician with the brain the size of a pea (plenty about) to promote your cause. Then you need an obscure argument to claim your compensation, the further back in time the better, i.e. my family were Roman slaves (sue Italy), American slaves (sue the USA) or were transported (sue the UK), you get the idea, currently the slave thing seems the most popular. However worth a mention are were you wronged by a Royal in the past, is your university inclusive, did your family suffer from Viking raids (Norway is very rich and I'm filing a claim to get my gold back), the list goes on. You must be inventive and appear wronged by some cause, or something annoys you that is out of your control like a street name or pub sign that have stood for 300 years or more. Ignore the feeling of the majority as you and your fellow snowflakes must fight the people with privilege who work and pay taxes (aka ordinary folk), not your snowflake friends. Anyway the important thing of course is to try and extract cash out of these innocents whatever way you can, that is the basic principle. Of course when you win and are richer than them you must reassess your strategy, don't want you paying tax do we? After reviewing your circumstances I feel you may have a claim against her Royal Highness the Queen for not being included as one her maids in waiting.

Oh dear sweet Basil, I'm afraid the rough trade who lurk in these forums aren't for you, I have thought long and hard how to explain this to your sensitive nature, no way of dodging it I'm afraid, before we start look up the word 'fuck'. Cast your mind back to your wedding night, your new husband fiddling with your nightdress wasn't trying to adjust it dear lady, he had other intentions, this is where the word fuck emanates from and where your lovely kiddies started. Don't believe his lies about Pixies, the damp sensation was not Pixie dust my dear, sorry to break the news. Now not long ago in a far distant reality the American people decided it was in their best interests to put into power a senile old fool, with a dodgy family and the inability to remember even his name, oh how the world rejoiced. He was called Biden, and the people sang his praises at every public event, huge sections of the crowd singing 'Fuck you Biden', out of love. At one particular sporting event the crowd were singing Bidens praise when the winner who was called Brandon was being interviewed, he asked the commentator what they were singing and she said 'Lets go Brandon', the poor soul was obviously deaf. This went viral and the words of the song are now embedded not only in the USA but worldwide as a mark of our respect. LETS GO BRANDON Woke to follow, hope to have served you Rob (once your favourite target)

You're on, look forward to it, please stay away or play cod with beers, I'll handle it, thanks mate, owe you one

Oh yes, however the lovely Basil I'm afraid does not have our sense of humour - but 'in for a pound'

Good point, they still live in normality, seems to have bypassed us Signed Rob Adviser to @Chriswith his cross dressing problems @EastCoast50 with his drink and sexual fetishes @McGrim with his desire to lose his virginity and currently on the 3rd chapter of advice for @Icequeen on her 'ploughing' quest and inability to find the correct size 'share' @baldie - no hope son, beyond my powers

KEY ??? even I wouldn't stoop that low, I'm gonna tell Dot

Had Roxy and Pengy over for a wild party, lots of leather, drink and whips, we had a ball. Then I woke up

I'll second that FU SC