Merlin007 Posted October 28, 2012 Member ID: 2068 Group: +++ COD5 Head Admin Followers: 71 Topic Count: 1136 Topics Per Day: 0.21 Content Count: 8600 Content Per Day: 1.62 Reputation: 7572 Achievement Points: 76773 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 67 Joined: 12/25/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 19 hours ago Birthday: 05/23/1973 Device: Windows Posted October 28, 2012 EMPLOYEE NOTICE ************************** Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment. This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early). Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Government to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination). Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers). A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as the Government deems appropriate. Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance). Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the Government. Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Government has always prided themselves on the amount of SHIT they give our citizens. Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of your MP, who has been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle. Sincerely, The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (EVIL) PS - Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, the Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off. DEEJAYKEG, jimboom, baldie and 1 other 4 Awards
Hunter1948 Posted October 28, 2012 Member ID: 1850 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 98 Topic Count: 328 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 8620 Content Per Day: 1.60 Reputation: 4222 Achievement Points: 55994 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 09/29/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 29, 2023 Birthday: 06/19/1948 Posted October 28, 2012 Boy isn't that the truth. LOL Awards
2_MANY_BEERS Posted October 28, 2012 Member ID: 96 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 108 Topic Count: 1049 Topics Per Day: 0.18 Content Count: 8817 Content Per Day: 1.53 Reputation: 3309 Achievement Points: 62219 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 19 Birthday: 06/30/1954 Device: Windows Posted October 28, 2012 lol
little_old_man Posted October 28, 2012 Member ID: 1194 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 40 Topic Count: 436 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 6692 Content Per Day: 1.20 Reputation: 11691 Achievement Points: 53094 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 76 Joined: 02/27/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 16, 2023 Birthday: 04/15/1960 Posted October 28, 2012 Wow, and I thought we had it bad in the states. It really sucks in Canada. Awards
Noears711XI Posted October 29, 2012 Member ID: 238 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 189 Topic Count: 75 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2162 Content Per Day: 0.37 Reputation: 1940 Achievement Points: 19609 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 1 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 8, 2022 Birthday: 07/09/1957 Posted October 29, 2012 Thank you LMAO Awards
jimboom Posted October 29, 2012 Member ID: 3766 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 70 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 126 Content Per Day: 0.03 Reputation: 117 Achievement Points: 1681 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/02/12 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 13, 2021 Birthday: 03/20/1968 Posted October 29, 2012 fuuny but sometruth lol
BeerGoat Posted October 29, 2012 Member ID: 2923 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 15 Topic Count: 24 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 1251 Content Per Day: 0.25 Reputation: 295 Achievement Points: 8401 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/24/11 Status: Offline Last Seen: Monday at 01:40 PM Birthday: 03/20/1976 Device: Windows Posted October 29, 2012 on standby Awards
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