BloodRidden82 Posted September 9, 2015 Member ID: 22621 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 1 Topic Count: 15 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 25 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 43 Achievement Points: 343 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 06/05/15 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 27, 2019 Share Posted September 9, 2015 A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream." Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!" eidolonFIRE, tsw 8.5, baldie and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tsw 8.5 Posted September 10, 2015 Member ID: 906 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 143 Topic Count: 512 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 17078 Content Per Day: 3.26 Reputation: 42067 Achievement Points: 148515 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 677 Joined: 12/20/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 6 hours ago Birthday: 11/30/1960 Device: Windows Share Posted September 10, 2015 So Little Johnny's teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny unless she is absolutely sure she will win it. One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says "teacher, I'll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is." She replies, "okay, meet me after class and we'll settle it." But before class ends, she goes to the restroom and removes her panties. After class is over and the students clear out, Johnny makes his guess. "Blue." "Nope. You got it wrong," she says as she lifts her skirt to reveal she isn't wearing any underwear. "Well come with me out to my dads car, he's waiting for me, and I'll get you the money." She follows him out. When they get to the car she informs his dad that he got the bet wrong and that she showed Johnny that she wasn't wearing any underwear. His dad exclaims: "That mother fucker! He bet me $100 this morning that he'd see your pussy before the end of the day! eidolonFIRE, White_Dragon, baldie and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Sammy Posted September 10, 2015 Member ID: 3036 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 31 Topic Count: 219 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 9419 Content Per Day: 2.08 Reputation: 7515 Achievement Points: 62539 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 21 Joined: 11/29/11 Status: Offline Last Seen: December 30, 2023 Birthday: 04/26/2008 Device: Windows Share Posted September 10, 2015 Smart boy, that Johnny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
White_Dragon Posted September 10, 2015 Member ID: 20018 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 27 Topic Count: 47 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 184 Content Per Day: 0.05 Reputation: 244 Achievement Points: 1870 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/08/13 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 9, 2023 Birthday: 07/01/1952 Share Posted September 10, 2015 Little Johnny & The Spelling "B" It's the first day of the new school year and the teacher wants to see who knows what. Good Morning Class It's Monday morning and the I have decided to have a spelling "B" and Says "OK Class here are the rules for today's Spelling "B" I will go through the alphabet starting with the Letter "A" and will call on students one at a time. That student will repeat the letter make a word then spell that word and then put that word in a Sentence" The teacher then says the first letter is "A" who would like to start? At that instant Little Johnny jumps up and says "A" ASS Hole A-s-s-h-o-l-e Timmy is a Fucking Ass Hole! The teacher almost falls over backward and screams out NO! NO! NO! Johnny That just will not Do!! now Sit down and do not blurt out again !! I will call the students name I want to do each letter and word, Johnny just sit there and be silent unless I call your name! So the teacher goes through the alphabet and every letter Little Johnny has his hand up frantically waving it in the air and every once in awhile will start to blurt out but, the teacher catches him before he can get more the letter out. Finally she get to the letter "R" and thinks to herself Little johnny can't possibly come up with a dirty word for the letter "R" and she decides to call him and says "OK Johnny it your turn and the Letter is "R" ! Little Johnny sits there puzzled for a moment and then slowly says "R" with a short pause then says "R" again in a loud Voice- "R" RAT R-A-T A big old FUCKING RAT with a big old FUCKING LONG TAIL. baldie 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
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