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An elderly Scotsman lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favourite biscuits wafting up the stairs. He gathered his remaining strength, and lifted himself from the bed. Leaning on the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs. With laboured breath, he leaned against the door-frame, gazing into the kitchen. Were it not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favourite biscuits, freshly baked. Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of love from his devoted Scottish wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man? Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in crumpled posture. His aged and withered hand trembled towards a biscuit at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked by his wife with a spatula............. "Fuck off" she said, "they're for the funeral."

lol! That is what 60 years will get you!

XtremeIdiots would like to wish all members celebrating their birthday today a happy birthday. Muffinhandz --

Mr thump may had a few too many on the plane ......fear of flying or the meeting of heads

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday

I love Subway, I hear Queenies also fond of a 12 inch?? my favourites the gluten free 6 inch breakfast sub, never knew you could get Chinese subs though Pete??

What are you blabbering about Mike, they already opted for other countries cause we all know the Germans and Koreans make better thing then the US.. plus your subs are made from Chinese parts (lol) https://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/carney-germany-trade-security-submarines-1.7617600