DEEJAYKEG Posted November 29, 2014 Member ID: 1238 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 35 Topic Count: 1207 Topics Per Day: 0.23 Content Count: 6083 Content Per Day: 1.18 Reputation: 4984 Achievement Points: 50727 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 11 Joined: 03/12/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 11 Device: Kindle Fire Share Posted November 29, 2014 The wife's back on the warpath again. She was up for making a sex movielast night, and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.I've accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles. My next crapcould spell disaster.My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them. It was my ownfault. I should have taken them off.I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night, or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.I woke up this morning at 8, and could sense something was wrong..I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, notbreathing! I panicked. I didn't know what to do. Then I rememberedMcDonald's serves breakfast until 11:30.Bought the missus a hamster skin coat last week. Took her to thefair last night, and it took me 3 hours to get her off the Ferris wheel.The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with. Itold her, "Only you. All the others kept me awake all night!"My missus packed my bags, and as I walked out the front door, shescreamed, "I wish you a slow and painful death, you bastard!""Oh," I replied, "so now you want me to stay!"I've just installed strobe lights in the bedroom. It makes the wifelook like she's moving during sex.. Millpucky, BigPapaDean, TBB and 12 others 15 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
BigPapaDean Posted November 29, 2014 Member ID: 1128 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 78 Topic Count: 1199 Topics Per Day: 0.23 Content Count: 6528 Content Per Day: 1.25 Reputation: 4407 Achievement Points: 63435 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 02/13/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 22 hours ago Birthday: 10/21/1954 Device: Windows Share Posted November 29, 2014 Hahahahahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
TBB Posted November 29, 2014 Member ID: 989 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 25 Topic Count: 268 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 18192 Content Per Day: 3.47 Reputation: 20228 Achievement Points: 133325 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 267 Joined: 01/07/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 5 hours ago Birthday: 01/27/1946 Device: Windows Share Posted November 29, 2014 Good ones - thanks!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Nisty* Posted November 29, 2014 Member ID: 21058 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 220 Topic Count: 101 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 2494 Content Per Day: 0.68 Reputation: 2778 Achievement Points: 20963 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 14 Joined: 04/25/14 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 18, 2021 Birthday: 03/07/1987 Share Posted November 29, 2014 :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
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