Shamu Posted June 17, 2012 Member ID: 715 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 8 Topic Count: 418 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 2178 Content Per Day: 0.38 Reputation: 1183 Achievement Points: 16606 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 1 Joined: 11/09/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 2, 2023 Birthday: 11/04/1943 Posted June 17, 2012 Can you cry under water? How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to? Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity? Why does a round pizza come in a square box? What disease did cured ham actually have? How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours? If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV? Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway... Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural? Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him? My personal favorite: If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME junk, why didn't he just buy dinner? If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Why did you just try singing the two songs above? Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window? Why, Why, Why Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are almost dead? Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money? Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him? Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets? Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'? If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale? Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance? Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try? How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures? When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?' Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over? In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat? How come you never hear father-in-law jokes? The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons are suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you. HellKid, Blackbart and BigPapaDean 3
TBB Posted June 17, 2012 Member ID: 989 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 25 Topic Count: 290 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 21033 Content Per Day: 3.73 Reputation: 22796 Achievement Points: 151083 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 407 Joined: 01/07/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 11 hours ago Birthday: 01/27/1946 Device: Windows Posted June 17, 2012 Nice ones - thanks Awards
BigPapaDean Posted June 18, 2012 Member ID: 1128 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 78 Topic Count: 1213 Topics Per Day: 0.22 Content Count: 6560 Content Per Day: 1.17 Reputation: 4441 Achievement Points: 63716 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 6 Joined: 02/13/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: Tuesday at 01:50 PM Birthday: 10/21/1954 Device: Windows Posted June 18, 2012 Shamu I really like that. There actually are some very good questions there! Lol! Awards
HellKid Posted June 18, 2012 Member ID: 2515 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 98 Topic Count: 129 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 1305 Content Per Day: 0.25 Reputation: 1673 Achievement Points: 13656 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 7 Joined: 05/21/11 Status: Offline Last Seen: Yesterday at 06:59 AM Birthday: 01/15/1964 Device: Windows Posted June 18, 2012 Subject: A Legal Question Is this statutory rape??? Or is it just a moosedemeanor??? Awards
JohnnyDos Posted June 18, 2012 Member ID: 77 Group: Fallen Members Followers: 111 Topic Count: 1018 Topics Per Day: 0.18 Content Count: 7527 Content Per Day: 1.30 Reputation: 9175 Achievement Points: 69486 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 47 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 8, 2020 Posted June 18, 2012 We don't make pennies anymore in Canada.It'll cost 5cents for my thoughts Shamu.So with all those questions I should be able to make a few bucks.LOL
Hunter1948 Posted June 18, 2012 Member ID: 1850 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 98 Topic Count: 328 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 8620 Content Per Day: 1.60 Reputation: 4222 Achievement Points: 55994 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 09/29/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 29, 2023 Birthday: 06/19/1948 Posted June 18, 2012 We don't make pennies anymore in Canada.It'll cost 5cents for my thoughts Shamu.So with all those questions I should be able to make a few bucks.LOL +1 LOL Awards
LtLaszlo Posted June 18, 2012 Member ID: 151 Group: ++ COD2 Admin Followers: 62 Topic Count: 190 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 9241 Content Per Day: 1.60 Reputation: 24525 Achievement Points: 95575 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 323 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: Yesterday at 03:31 AM Birthday: 05/17/1959 Device: Kindle Fire Posted June 18, 2012 Good ones Shamu!! Some of trhose certainly makes you wonder! And Hellkid, that is one fucked up moose. First it's a "Not Real" buffalo, second I believe it's a male and finally is unlikely it has a hole where he needs one (possibly hurting his dick!!)! Stupid moose! HellKid 1 Awards
PimpedOutPete Posted June 19, 2012 Member ID: 174 Group: +++ COD2 Head Admin Followers: 130 Topic Count: 387 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 15030 Content Per Day: 2.61 Reputation: 8047 Achievement Points: 92227 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 59 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 7 hours ago Birthday: 04/23/1970 Device: Macintosh Posted June 19, 2012 lol Awards
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