Senapsbread Posted June 24, 2014 Member ID: 20680 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 6 Topic Count: 22 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 205 Content Per Day: 0.05 Reputation: 100 Achievement Points: 1481 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/11/13 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 8, 2023 Birthday: 01/05/1993 Posted June 24, 2014 Hi, I just need to write this somewhere, need to get it out. Not sure if I am going to post this text or not. Guess I did if you see this now. To get a better understanding you need to know that my partner is a long sufferer from eating disorders, compulsive disorders and depressions and such. Today I had the worst day of my life, a day I never thought I was going experience in my whole life. When I woke up today I did my regular morning routine, I went to the computer and turned off the pc-wake up larm. Started chrome and took up my morning tabs, Reddit, Gmail, Xi and lastly Facebook.I open Facebook and I see that I have gotten multiple messages from my partner.I open it up and and started skimming thru and it didn't take long until I realize that this is her final note, telling me that she is going to end her life, trying to convince me why, telling me that she is sorry but that my life is going to be better without her. Immediate great panic runs thru my body and I start fondling around trying to get up my phone and started calling her, no answer, called her home, same there and then called her mothers cell and she answered. I stressed told her what had happened and she told my she was on her way home, we hung up. Starting to loose myself and struggled to keep consciousness and bracing for the worst. I don't know for how long, could been about five minutes or hours.Finally I got a message on facebook from her that she was there, I immediately told her to call me. She does, and I still shooked up jumping between happy, sad, angry, confused and so on. She tells me that she had hung herself and passed out, but the rope had to gotten loose or stretched so she had woken up when her mother got to her. She had gotten a suicidal impulse and was convinced that it was the only way to stop being sick and stop feeling down.Afterwards she had a meeting with her rehabilitation doctors, and with her father. Then finally she got home to me and I have never felt such happiness and sadness in my whole life, understand, too me, she was dead, gone, never to come back as the same time I saw her and knew she was alive.We have had a long day after this and she has agreed to enter a psych ward until she is more stable again. She has promised that this such thing will never happen again and that she regrets it, I believe her but we both know that when she get low enough she isn't in charge anymore.I still haven't woken up from this and are really shaken and needed this to try to process it.Thank you for reading and thank you all for being XI.
JAYsus_NL Posted June 24, 2014 Member ID: 20692 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 35 Topic Count: 217 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 1943 Content Per Day: 0.47 Reputation: 2009 Achievement Points: 16789 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 2 Joined: 12/16/13 Status: Offline Last Seen: February 8 Birthday: 01/13/1980 Device: Windows Posted June 24, 2014 Jesus Senaps! I can`t even imagine how you feel right now! Only thing i can say; Keep up, talk and be there for her..... Awards
KingStinger! Posted June 24, 2014 Member ID: 2465 Group: +++ Minecraft Head Admin Followers: 30 Topic Count: 170 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 1818 Content Per Day: 0.36 Reputation: 1937 Achievement Points: 14560 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 2 Joined: 05/06/11 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 20 Birthday: 04/17/1972 Device: Windows Posted June 24, 2014 You both need prayer, know that I will be praying for you both to recover from such a traumatic experience. I wish you strength pal.. Gatorgirl 1 Awards
TBB Posted June 24, 2014 Member ID: 989 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 25 Topic Count: 290 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 20365 Content Per Day: 3.64 Reputation: 22448 Achievement Points: 147248 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 389 Joined: 01/07/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 16 hours ago Birthday: 01/27/1946 Device: Windows Posted June 24, 2014 Take a deep breath - hopefully the worst is over - she seems to realize she is in a dark place and is seeking help - stay strong - my thoughts are with you! HarryWeezer 1 Awards
deerejon Posted June 24, 2014 Member ID: 842 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 62 Topic Count: 278 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 3714 Content Per Day: 0.66 Reputation: 3153 Achievement Points: 28467 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 4 Joined: 12/06/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: Tuesday at 05:18 PM Birthday: 05/04/1965 Device: Windows Posted June 24, 2014 I would never have written this online ever, but I want you to learn from my situation My father was suffering from depression. Which I thought was due to his divorce from my mother business was rough that year and the whole family was fighting... I never understood mental illness, I sat with him I'm therapy where the doc asked him flat out if he ever thought about hurting himself... He was like nah.. I was like nah... He lived on his own but stayed withe and my family a few times a week... He always beat me to work.. One day he wasn't there and when I couldn't reach him I went to his home and found him in the basement I carry and accept that I didn't get it and I still don't but I do know it's real... The point is you need to be more than supportive and know that she can and probably will lie to ease your mind. Please do not believe her and be completely available to her. JohnnyDos, Damage_inc-, Senapsbread and 3 others 6 Awards
PimpedOutPete Posted June 25, 2014 Member ID: 174 Group: +++ COD2 Head Admin Followers: 130 Topic Count: 387 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 15027 Content Per Day: 2.63 Reputation: 8042 Achievement Points: 92205 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 59 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 4 hours ago Birthday: 04/23/1970 Device: Macintosh Posted June 25, 2014 That's a tough situation and my thoughts are with both of you. It definitely sounds like a cry for help. Please seek out true physical help from resources around you, family, friends and otherwise. Awards
Senapsbread Posted June 26, 2014 Member ID: 20680 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 6 Topic Count: 22 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 205 Content Per Day: 0.05 Reputation: 100 Achievement Points: 1481 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/11/13 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 8, 2023 Birthday: 01/05/1993 Author Posted June 26, 2014 Thank you all for the support. I'm trying to spend more time with her, and to spend more active time with her. I still walk and feeling right on the edge of having a panic attack or just like I'm going to break. Thank you for sharing, it means alot and I'm sorry about your father. And I know I shouldn't trust her, to get reminded of it doesn't hurt tho, I'm still so fucking naive and most often doesn't know when she tells me something and it's a lie. I have walked with this fear that I will wake up one day and she is gone for a long time now because I knew how she felt, but now it's real in a whole other way and I seriously don't know how to deal with it. I have never been so scared in my whole life. Thing is she seems like she has shaken this of, I don't know if it's just holding a charade or if this was a wake up call. But that scares me aswell because I know that a person that have decided to take it's life is content.Maybe I am overreacting, I dont know.
HarryWeezer Posted June 26, 2014 Member ID: 20166 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 40 Topic Count: 611 Topics Per Day: 0.14 Content Count: 7655 Content Per Day: 1.81 Reputation: 7232 Achievement Points: 53682 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 36 Joined: 10/04/13 Status: Offline Last Seen: March 26 Birthday: 10/16/1946 Device: Windows Posted June 26, 2014 As with others, I have had experience with this with a close family member. The most important thing that you can do to save her life is to get her professional help. Where I live, had she been taken to a hospital in a suicide attempt, she automatically would have been taken by a police officer from the hospital to a facility where she would have been kept for some period for diagnosis and treatment, against her will if necessary. Yes, be close to her; yes, seek prayer. But DO get her into a psychiatric facility TODAY! Trust me on that. If she refuses to go, call her parents in and together, persuade her that she needs treatment. deerejon 1 Awards
deerejon Posted June 26, 2014 Member ID: 842 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 62 Topic Count: 278 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 3714 Content Per Day: 0.66 Reputation: 3153 Achievement Points: 28467 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 4 Joined: 12/06/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: Tuesday at 05:18 PM Birthday: 05/04/1965 Device: Windows Posted June 26, 2014 (edited) She hasn't shaken it off... My father was a great pretender.... I cant believe I am even talking about this but if my situation can help you then I'll talk about it... She hasn't shaken it off....and shes not content or she would not have those thoughts...you are like me and do not understand...But I do know inner turmoil and depression is REAL... Edited June 26, 2014 by deerejon Awards
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