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Fire

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Hello everyone i guess your all wondering what i,v been upto

well the true is nothing much just trying to sort my life out as you

all know that i got myself a job but got layed of due to ill health [ stress,depression]

then i went to the doctors last week and she told me that it would be the last sick line

she will give me as i won,t get better looking at 4 walls.

I put a post up in September about my dad being rushed into hospital after loseing

4 pints of blood because of a vain in his liver burst due to his diebetes well he isen,t

any better and he won,t be getting any better just worse as my mum and dad was at

the hospital the day and they told them that there is nothing else they can do for him

but they are going to send him to Edinburgh hospital keep him in for 5 days to do test

to see if he is able to get a liver transplant.

My dad is 68 years old worked all his life and at his age i don,t think they could help

him because if he dose get 1 and it work it might happen all over again or it might not

suit him then he would have to wait months,years even and i don,t think my mum could

go through all that again i coulden,t and i rather see my dad live his life what he has left

without going through more tests and more pain.

So my doctor thinks i won,t get better becuse i,m looking at 4 walls everyday sorry but

she is not in my shoes and she is not going through what i,m going through right now

with my dad and all that shit.54b6c6a144360_mydad.jpg54b6c6c7d474d_images.jpg54b6c6d554cb8_iloveyoudadglitters.gifSo please keep me in your thoughts and

prayers to help me get through this real bad time in my life

as my dad means alot to me and i LOVE him to bits.

Thanks FIRE :cry: :(:heart::heart::kiss::hope:

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Fire, you stay strong. Remember, you deserve everything good that comes for all you have endured. take care, thoughts and prayers for you.

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I know you've been through the mill of late Fire but don't give up hope. I know it's easy for me to say but try and think positive x

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Thoughts and prayers to you and your family fire, i hope things start looking up for you soon!

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God bless you and your family, Fire! Sending thoughts and prayers your way! I know depression can be tough. Music helped me through a rough time. I listened to one CD over and over again to try and memorize the lyrics. It got my mind off of things. Be strong! Take it one day at a time! Good luck!

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Get your self to park head they call it paradise lol hope things sort them self out for you and family xxxx I hope this brought a little smile to your face

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Fire I know how it seems the world is trying to devour and eat you up! It feels like you are in a world all by yourself and that there is no help for you! You also feel a certain responsibility to your parents! While in the real world that may be true but you are not dealing with the real world in this depression state. You are dealing with the world your brain has created to try and protect you from the real world. You see your body and primarily your brain is in survival mode at this time. Why wouldn't it be with all the shit you been through? I say this because I deal with this daily and have severely for over 5 yrs now. I have, to a certain extent, been this way all my life and never knew it til I fell into this mental world I now deal with. I am not saying your feelings are not true but that this feeling of being alone is not the real world. Your Dr thinks she is doing the right thing by trying to force you into making some physical advances when your mind isn't there yet and ready for it! I know how you feel and I am still living with this horrible debilitating disease. You feel there is no hope and wonder if it will ever end. My brother who had been down a road similar to that I now travel told me a long time ago, "Dean you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel but believe me it is there." For two years I looked for that light then one day from out of no where it was there. I want you to know that there is hope for all of us in some form or other. You are not alone in this battle of survival but you have brothers and sisters walking the same road and feeling the same feelings! Rest assured this too will pass! I had to reinvent my whole life as I had lost most of my memory of my past life. Today I have climbed back out of that dark horrible hole and remember the old life but today I am not that old person of 6 years ago. I want to encourage you to keep fighting and keep asking yourself what you can do to make it another day and keep climbing the ladder that will lead you back to your world as you want to live! I don't know if you believe in God but my faith helped me greatly as I needed someone to rely on when no one else was there. I am praying that you will find your way back to the life you want and need! God bless you my friend! I am always here if you feel the need to talk to someone who understands!

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The way you describe your doctor's outlook possibly suggests a dismissive attitude towards

an obvious mental health issue and it is regrettable that she seems to have opted for an

abrupt end to one aspect of the support you have been receiving.  It betrays the erroneous

"buck your ideas up" reaction to a person who is in distress and plagued by worries, never mind

the 'advance grief' of someone who has a very sick close relative.  Yes, there are ways one

can help oneself and perhaps provide some periods of respite from stress.  If you would like to

explore them, here's a link to one charity that provides advice.

 

Your friends in the clan aren't around all the time so, if you need to talk, don't forget the

Samaritans organisation - they aren't just there for the suicidal.  They're available 24/7/365:

http://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you/contact-us

 

I really do wish you better times and that your Dad's condition stabilises so you can experience

some joy once again.

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