Blond Men Jokes

[WolfTiS]

 

A friend told the blonde man: "Christmas is on
a Friday this year."

The blond man then said, "Let's hope it's not
the 13th."

------------------------------------

Two blonde men find three grenades, and they decide
to take them to a police station.

One asked: "What if one explodes before we get
there?"

The other says: "We'll lie and say we only
found two."

 

------------------------------------

A woman phoned her blonde neighbor man and
said:  "Close your curtains the next time you & your wife are
having sex.

The whole street was watching and laughing at you
yesterday."

To which the blonde man replied:"Well the
joke's on all of you because I wasn't even at home yesterday."

------------------------------------

 

A blonde man is in the bathroom and his wife
shouts:  "Did you find the shampoo?"

He answers, "Yes, but I'm not sure what to
do... it's for dry hair, and I've just wet mine."

------------------------------

A blonde man goes to the vet with his goldfish.

"I think it's got epilepsy," he tells the
vet.

The vet takes a look and says, "It seems calm
enough to me."

The blonde man says, "Wait, I haven't taken it
out of the bowl yet."

------------------------------------

A blonde man spies a letter lying on his doormat.

It says on the envelope "DO NOT BEND".

He spends the next 2 hours trying to figure out how
to pick it up.

------------------------------------

 

A blonde man shouts frantically into the phone,
"My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes
apart!"

"Is this her first child?" asks the
Doctor.

"No!" he shouts, "this is her
husband!"

------------------------------------

A blonde man's dog goes missing and he is
frantic.  His wife says "Why don't you put an ad in the paper?"

He does, but two weeks later the dog is still
missing.

"What did you put in the paper?" his wife
asks.

"Here boy!" he replies.

------------------------------------

 

A blonde man is in jail.  The guard looks in
his cell and sees him hanging by his feet.

"Just WHAT are you doing?" he asks.

"Hanging myself," the blonde replies.

"The rope should be around your neck" says
the guard.

"I tried that," he replies, "but then
I couldn't breathe."

------------------------------------

 

An Italian tourist asks a blonde man: 
"Why do scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?"

To which the blonde man replies:  "If they
fell forward, they'd still be in the boat."

 

[TBB]

Good ones - thanks.

[tsw 8.5]

[BUDMAN]

nice....and thanks for sharing

[Damage_inc-]

i dont get it

[TBB]

i dont get it

 

That's because you were blond as a kid!

[Damage_inc-]

 

i dont get it

 

That's because you were blond as a kid!

U R CORRECT.N1