DEEJAYKEG

As many of you know, I used to work at the Channel Tunnel, and my employer, Kent Police, decided it would be a good idea to develop our French language skills. One of the course books was entitled “Merde!” by Genevieve. Most of us were word perfect inside a week and moved on to the sequel, “Merde Encore!”. We were required to learn 40 new words of technical or legal language per night but that was a struggle!

RIP Florian Schneider.

Which of your "constitutional rights" (let's remember that the document was published by hypocrites who owned slaves and talked about freedom for later generations of the gullible) permits you to infect, negligently or wilfully, your fellow citizens? I recommend reading the death stats which are predicted to hit 135,000 deaths in the USA by August! We, on the outside, look on, as we usually do, in incredulity...

Yes, the funeral directors are going to have a lot of business, aren't they?

I binge-watched Devs over two nights on the BBC iPlayer but it is also available on Prime: https://www.amazon.com/Devs-Season-1/dp/B085LQK9N7

STOLEN!

How much is a bottle of disinfectant? Oh dear, I have done it now... Off this goes to the Politics forum!

I own many UV resistant Kitshack buffs (to keep the UV off my lupus scars). If you want to discuss an XI design with them, click here: https://www.buffusa.com/custom/

I went to the doctor. He said Mercury is in Uranus. I said I didn't do all that Astrology stuff. He said, "Neither do I - my thermometer just broke"!

Should I really be surprised when the companies are called Activision and Infinity Ward?! I spent £56 on this heap of crap and 19 days (YES 19 DAYS!!!) downloading it and now it won't let me past the Activision log-in screen. To add insult to injury, the chimps at the parcel delivery company dropped my case of beer at the warehouse...

I am driving the lady wife nuts with my online searches for food. I began prepping for Brexit so we are using my stocks to tick over. I still have lots of coffee, washing up liquid, and baked beans. Getting fresh stuff has been very problematic because none of the supermarket delivery services have free slots left for the next three weeks and, despite dying twice then suffering a major stroke that has left me disabled, I am not classified as "vulnerable"! I guess they take the view that anyone who kicks the Grim Reaper's ass will find some bread and cheese eventually. The latest order, from a butcher in Scotland who supplies the Queen, went well...not! The moron driving the delivery truck delivered my package of beef to the wrong address! So, I am trying a farm in Ripon, Yorkshire next. They have some of my favourite Algerian style Merguez spicy lamb sausages. I have spent the last week trying to download COD: MW 2019 but it keeps getting stuck with 50GB to go. My back is playing up awfully. Once that improves, I have a tower PC to rebuild. It's a former Medion Erazer gaming system for which I have bought a new HDD and 16GB RAM. When it is up and running, I am going to devote it to folding to see if we can crack this virus's DNA. You can expect to see me in the servers very soon.

Looks like one of those weird challenges on Ready Steady Cook! I was over the Moon, today, as I had fried eggs on toast - the milkman delivered the bread and the lady who looks after the chickens on our rural estate gifted a box of hens' eggs! Buying food is more of a problem here as there are no delivery slots for any of the supermarkets available. My wife went to Waitrose during Wrinkly Hour, the other day, and the manager asked why she was there. She mentioned my dodgy ticker. In future, I told her, just scream at the top of your voice "BIPOLAR!" and watch the aisles empty ahead of you!"

What's your point?

You have the solution at your fingertips and have mentioned it...mute! You can also place a bouncing betty behind the person offending you or throw a sticky at them. Works for me!

Invite worked btw!

Correction: just under four days!

I am DeeJayKeg#2149 but I have just bought the game and it will take around 60 hours to download.

I have just downloaded the remake of Half Life - Black Mesa - which has received rave reviews. It is fan-made so should, one hopes, not feature the bugs which spoiled the original. Cheap also via Steam.

Be kind to the nurses. See you when you get back. https://giphy.com/gifs/cJGRxpn526t54iyBCd/html5

The game crashes when I try to download this mod...

I use this (Professional version): https://www.ccleaner.com/ccleaner

I have 456 items totalling 19GB.

Can you believe my nephew was given this...by his mother?!

If you can download a map in five minutes at 13KB/sec tell me your secret. It takes 45-60 here!

I have now physically extracted the boot HDD from my old tower and mounted it in an enclosure so it’s contents are accessible. I copied over all the map files from the old machine so I should have them all(fingers crossed). Thank you again @Labob.