SHADOOW Posted June 14, 2010 Member ID: 1126 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 1 Topic Count: 61 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 679 Content Per Day: 0.12 Reputation: 0 Achievement Points: 4007 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: Never Birthday: 07/21/1970 Posted June 14, 2010 this is a must read, i laughed my butt off at this one. a friend e-mailed it to me so i just had to share with the idiots. enjoy everyone. When girls don't put out!! This was written by a guy ... it's pretty damn smart. Girls -- Please have a sense of humor! I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.' I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!' So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... 'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.' She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?' Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.' We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.' I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.' Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?' I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.' And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?' Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.
Caper Posted June 14, 2010 Member ID: 102 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 10 Topic Count: 201 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 1776 Content Per Day: 0.31 Reputation: 82 Achievement Points: 10986 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: June 20, 2014 Birthday: 05/06/1969 Posted June 14, 2010 well that was funny... I will have to try that one.
Reload Posted June 14, 2010 Member ID: 615 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 0 Topic Count: 42 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 606 Content Per Day: 0.11 Reputation: 0 Achievement Points: 3461 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/23/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: Never Birthday: 11/07/1968 Posted June 14, 2010 hehe nice one
BUDMAN Posted June 14, 2010 Member ID: 800 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 152 Topic Count: 139 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 7100 Content Per Day: 1.26 Reputation: 4638 Achievement Points: 60384 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 6 Joined: 11/27/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 27 minutes ago Birthday: 05/29/1957 Device: Android Posted June 14, 2010 Shadowdreamer - i don't feel like it this is a must read, i laughed my butt off at this one. a friend e-mailed it to me so i just had to share with the idiots. enjoy everyone. When girls don't put out!! This was written by a guy ... it's pretty damn smart. Girls -- Please have a sense of humor! I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.' I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!' So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... 'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.' She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?' Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.' We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.' I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.' Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?' I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.' And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?' Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her. Awards
BUDMAN Posted June 14, 2010 Member ID: 800 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 152 Topic Count: 139 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 7100 Content Per Day: 1.26 Reputation: 4638 Achievement Points: 60384 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 6 Joined: 11/27/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 27 minutes ago Birthday: 05/29/1957 Device: Android Posted June 14, 2010 TFF nice one TE_BUDMAN Awards
SGTDANKO Posted June 14, 2010 Member ID: 3214 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 27 Topic Count: 206 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 2362 Content Per Day: 0.49 Reputation: 50 Achievement Points: 14004 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 02/21/12 Status: Offline Last Seen: July 4, 2015 Birthday: 06/23/1981 Posted June 14, 2010 lmao nice
Damit1 Posted June 14, 2010 Member ID: 1188 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 258 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 1692 Content Per Day: 0.30 Reputation: 1355 Achievement Points: 15036 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 3 Joined: 02/26/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: June 21, 2024 Device: Android Posted June 14, 2010 Lo0oL thats some funny stuff Awards
EaTaBoOgEr Posted June 14, 2010 Member ID: 369 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 0 Topic Count: 8 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 40 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 0 Achievement Points: 285 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/13/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: Never Birthday: 05/09/1959 Posted June 14, 2010 That was great!
BlackOp8 Posted June 14, 2010 Member ID: 1440 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 0 Topic Count: 23 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 588 Content Per Day: 0.11 Reputation: 0 Achievement Points: 3170 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 05/23/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: Never Birthday: 01/18/1986 Posted June 14, 2010 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA ownage!
tsw 8.5 Posted June 14, 2010 Member ID: 906 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 144 Topic Count: 537 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 17544 Content Per Day: 3.12 Reputation: 42645 Achievement Points: 151942 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 691 Joined: 12/20/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 15 hours ago Birthday: 11/30/1960 Device: Windows Posted June 14, 2010 that was some good stuff there. Awards
pwrcrzy52 Posted June 15, 2010 Member ID: 103 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 43 Topic Count: 698 Topics Per Day: 0.12 Content Count: 3300 Content Per Day: 0.58 Reputation: 1604 Achievement Points: 25692 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 2 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: December 31, 2024 Birthday: 07/10/1952 Device: Windows Posted June 15, 2010 LMAO Good one !!!!! Awards
NITRO Posted June 15, 2010 Member ID: 1095 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 34 Topic Count: 101 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 3639 Content Per Day: 0.65 Reputation: 2460 Achievement Points: 24702 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 2 Joined: 02/06/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: March 17 Birthday: 03/23/1979 Device: iPhone Posted June 15, 2010 Two thumbs up. A great idea although sounds kinda dangerous to me lol Awards
S.W.A.T Posted June 15, 2010 Member ID: 1501 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 0 Topic Count: 0 Topics Per Day: 0 Content Count: 1 Content Per Day: 0.00 Reputation: 0 Achievement Points: 5 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 06/14/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: Never Birthday: 02/10/1994 Posted June 15, 2010 LMAO!! very nice hehe
Hijack Posted June 15, 2010 Member ID: 1007 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 30 Topic Count: 4 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 71 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 24 Achievement Points: 580 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 01/11/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: Sunday at 01:32 AM Device: Windows Posted June 15, 2010 That was a good one,lol:) Hijack Awards
SHADOOW Posted June 15, 2010 Member ID: 1126 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 1 Topic Count: 61 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 679 Content Per Day: 0.12 Reputation: 0 Achievement Points: 4007 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: Never Birthday: 07/21/1970 Author Posted June 15, 2010 i thought all of you might like this one. i'm a woman and i laughed my butt off. nothing like slam take that. glad you enjoyed it as much as i did. it was just too funny to keep to myself had to share with my XI site friends.
WolfTiS Posted June 15, 2010 Member ID: 1130 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 28 Topic Count: 216 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 2267 Content Per Day: 0.41 Reputation: 586 Achievement Points: 17291 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 3 Joined: 02/13/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: July 12, 2021 Birthday: 04/02/1948 Posted June 15, 2010 Only thing wrong with trying that is you probably would never get it again the rest of your life.... Awards
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