A Nobel prize in the offing for our very own Budman

[RobMc]

It isn't often he's sober but the old boy made it through to the final selection for science with two other candidates, fingers crossed for him :-

The 1st candidate showed proof that humans were definitely from a genus evolving from Africa

The 2nd candidate showed proof that radio waves could be bent through time and space

The big moment

Up steps our very own Budman, he makes his way to the stage in front of the committee, unsteadily grasping the table he brings from his top pocket an old matchbox. Opening the matchbox there is a scream from the ladies present as a large hairy spider emerges, he places the spider on the table :-

'Walk forward' he says, and the spider walks forward

'Stop' he says and the spider stops

'Walk backwards' he says and the spider walks backwards

The committee are amazed, picking the spider up Budman pulls off all it's left legs, one of the women faints, he places it back on the table

'Go clockwise' he says, the spider goes clockwise

'Go anticlockwise' he says, the spider goes anti clockwise

Picking it up again he pulls off the remainder of it's legs and places it back on the table

'Walk forward' he says - nothing

'Walk backward' he says - nothing

'Go clockwise' he says - nothing

'Go anticlockwise' he says - nothing

He glances at the committee, and what does that prove? asks the chairman

Proudly Budman faces them and says - ' It proves that when you pull all the legs off a spider they go deaf'

 

Strike a new medal Rockape it's in the bag

[RobMc]

OMG what have I done ???

I can only apologise for posting under the joke forum, this was unintentional, I now realise that some sad fckrs here have zero sense of humour, and WILL be offended.

In way of making up I'll post a graph of the current interest rate rise over the past hour and a breakdown of todays blue chip gains.

So so so so sorry for trying to make you laugh, I'm trying believe me, I haven't smiled all day

 

LMFAO

[Bosun]

Well Rob you may think this is a really funny joke but spiders do have feelings and emotions.  https://beyondthetreat.com/do-spiders-have-feelings/   In my many years as a police officer I saw that serial killers often started by killing or torturing small animals and I see nothing different in joking about the deliberate dismemberment of an innocent arachnid.  Is this the start of your pathway to infamy?

If anyone has actually bothered to read this I'd like to say that I fucking HATE spiders and they should all be killed with fire.  Apart from the Huntsman Spider https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Huntsman_spider which is living in my lounge room.  Huntsmen are great.  They kill all sorts of anoying insects and sometimes the geckos https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common_house_gecko that shit on my walls.  The geckos shit on my walls I mean not the Huntsman. There is something really annoying about the fucking noise they make and the fact that they shit everywhere really irks me.

It's sort of obligatory to name your resident Huntsman Harry.  Or Fred.  Anything but Rob.

Do I get a prize if I get my post count up to a certain level?

Fuck I'm bored.

 

Edited August 5, 2022 by Bosun

[RobMc]

6 hours ago, Bosun said:

see nothing different in joking about the deliberate dismemberment of an innocent arachnid.  Is this the start of your pathway to infamy?

I'm already at the end of the path mate ( Gantt chart in place of smiley ) I keep a collection of idiots under the patio. (joke)

I'll bet you've named some spiders after your wives you naughty boy, 

7 hours ago, Bosun said:

There is something really annoying about the fucking noise they make and the fact that they shit everywhere really irks me.

Some people think the same about kids, generally the same people who love themselves and money 

Don't worry buddy your post count is heading for the stars, follow me 

[Sammy]

Some people think the same about adults.

[WeednFeed]

I personally hate raccoons! I would kill everyone of them if I could. I really don't care if they stay in the woods but those little shits that eat 1 bite out of every corn I grow or the ones that break into my pigeon coop and kill everything really piss me off. The those ones that break, tear and chew through my garbage containers really upset me. I have a bit of a raccoon cemetery in my yard! Or do I?

What really makes me mad are those SNOWFLAKES that feed those dam raccoons, encouraging them to seek food around dwellings, not  REAL SMART THING TO DO.

[RobMc]

1 hour ago, WeednFeed said:

What really makes me mad are those SNOWFLAKES that feed those dam raccoons,

I live in one of the last areas of the UK with native red squirrels, rapidly displaced by greys, sent on holiday from the USA years ago. We have been instructed (by the Government) to kill every grey we can to try to save the red. What do my neighbours do, they feed the greys and build them little houses, if you mention shooting them you're cruel, so goodbye red hello grey.

What's a grey squirrels natural enemy? that would live in the uk and just eat them?

[TBB]

1 hour ago, RobMc said:

I live in one of the last areas of the UK with native red squirrels, rapidly displaced by greys, sent on holiday from the USA years ago. We have been instructed (by the Government) to kill every grey we can to try to save the red. What do my neighbours do, they feed the greys and build them little houses, if you mention shooting them you're cruel, so goodbye red hello grey.

What's a grey squirrels natural enemy? that would live in the uk and just eat them?

@RobMc is the natural enemy of everything - just don't feed it or it will never go away

Edited August 6, 2022 by TBB

[GhostfaceJim]

[rexbowan]

LOL! It sounds like our congressmen trying to figure out how to make life better for the people they supposedly serve.