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Posted

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning..  

 

I went downstairs for breakfast  

hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,  

'Happy Birthday!',  

and possibly have a small present for me.  

 

As it turned out,  

she barely said good morning,  

let alone  

' Happy Birthday.'  

 

I thought....  

 

Well, that's marriage for you,  

but the kids....  

They will remember.  

 

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast

and didn't say a word..  

So when I left for the office,  

I felt pretty low  

and somewhat despondent.  

 

As I walked into my office,  

my secretary Jane said,  

'Good Morning Boss,  

and by the way  

Happy Birthday ! '  

It felt a little better  

that at least someone had remembered.  

 

I worked until one o'clock ,  

when Jane knocked on my door  

and said, 'You know,  

It's such a beautiful day outside,  

and it is your Birthday,  

what do you say we go out to lunch,  

just you and me..'  

I said, 'Thanks, Jane,  

that's the greatest thing  

I've heard all day.  

Let's go !'  

 

We went to lunch.  

But we didn't go  

where we normally would go.

She chose instead at a quiet bistro  

with a private table.  

We had two martinis each  

and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.  

 

On the way back to the office,

Jane said, 'You know,  

It's such a beautiful day...  

We don't need to go straight back to the office,  

Do We ?'  

 

I responded,  

'I guess not.  

What do you have in mind ?'  

She said,  

'Let's drop by my apartment,  

it's just around the corner..'  

 

After arriving at her apartment,  

Jane turned to me and said,

' Boss, if you don't mind,  

I'm going to step into the bedroom  

for just a moment.  

I'll be right back.'  

'Ok.' I nervously replied.  

 

She went into the bedroom and,  

after a couple of minutes,  

she came out  

carrying a huge birthday cake ...  

Followed  

by my wife,  

my kids,  

and dozens of my friends  

and co-workers,  

all singing 'Happy Birthday'.  

 

 

And I just sat there....  

 

On the couch.....  

 

Naked.

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning..   

I went downstairs for breakfast   

hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,   

'Happy Birthday!',   

and possibly have a small present for me.   

As it turned out,   

she barely said good morning,   

let alone   

' Happy Birthday.'   

I thought....   

Well, that's marriage for you,   

but the kids....   

They will remember.   

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast 

and didn't say a word..   

So when I left for the office,   

I felt pretty low   

and somewhat despondent.   

As I walked into my office,   

my secretary Jane said,   

'Good Morning Boss,   

and by the way   

Happy Birthday ! '   

It felt a little better   

that at least someone had remembered.   

I worked until one o'clock ,   

when Jane knocked on my door   

and said, 'You know,   

It's such a beautiful day outside,   

and it is your Birthday,   

what do you say we go out to lunch,   

just you and me..'   

I said, 'Thanks, Jane,   

that's the greatest thing   

I've heard all day.   

Let's go !'   

We went to lunch.   

But we didn't go   

where we normally would go. 

She chose instead at a quiet bistro   

with a private table.   

We had two martinis each   

and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.   

On the way back to the office, 

Jane said, 'You know,   

It's such a beautiful day...   

We don't need to go straight back to the office,   

Do We ?'   

I responded,   

'I guess not.   

What do you have in mind ?'   

She said,   

'Let's drop by my apartment,   

it's just around the corner..' 

  

After arriving at her apartment,   

Jane turned to me and said,

' Boss, if you don't mind,   

I'm going to step into the bedroom   

for just a moment.   

I'll be right back.'   

'Ok.' I nervously replied  

She went into the bedroom and,   

after a couple of minutes,   

she came out   

carrying a huge birthday cake ...   

Followed   

by my wife,   

my kids,   

and dozens of my friends   

and co-workers,   

all singing 'Happy Birthday'. 

  

 

And I just sat there....   

On the couch.....   

Naked.


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Posted
DEEJAYKEG - Why I'm Divorced
Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning..  

 

I went downstairs for breakfast  

hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,  

'Happy Birthday!',  

and possibly have a small present for me.  

 

As it turned out,  

she barely said good morning,  

let alone  

' Happy Birthday.'  

 

I thought....  

 

Well, that's marriage for you,  

but the kids....  

They will remember.  

 

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast

and didn't say a word..  

So when I left for the office,  

I felt pretty low  

and somewhat despondent.  

 

As I walked into my office,  

my secretary Jane said,  

'Good Morning Boss,  

and by the way  

Happy Birthday ! '  

It felt a little better  

that at least someone had remembered.  

 

I worked until one o'clock ,  

when Jane knocked on my door  

and said, 'You know,  

It's such a beautiful day outside,  

and it is your Birthday,  

what do you say we go out to lunch,  

just you and me..'  

I said, 'Thanks, Jane,  

that's the greatest thing  

I've heard all day.  

Let's go !'  

 

We went to lunch.  

But we didn't go  

where we normally would go.

She chose instead at a quiet bistro  

with a private table.  

We had two martinis each  

and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.  

 

On the way back to the office,

Jane said, 'You know,  

It's such a beautiful day...  

We don't need to go straight back to the office,  

Do We ?'  

 

I responded,  

'I guess not.  

What do you have in mind ?'  

She said,  

'Let's drop by my apartment,  

it's just around the corner..'  

 

After arriving at her apartment,  

Jane turned to me and said,

' Boss, if you don't mind,  

I'm going to step into the bedroom  

for just a moment.  

I'll be right back.'  

'Ok.' I nervously replied.  

 

She went into the bedroom and,  

after a couple of minutes,  

she came out  

carrying a huge birthday cake ...  

Followed  

by my wife,  

my kids,  

and dozens of my friends  

and co-workers,  

all singing 'Happy Birthday'.  

 

 

And I just sat there....  

 

On the couch.....  

 

Naked.

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning..   

I went downstairs for breakfast   

hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,   

'Happy Birthday!',   

and possibly have a small present for me.   

As it turned out,   

she barely said good morning,   

let alone   

' Happy Birthday.'   

I thought....   

Well, that's marriage for you,   

but the kids....   

They will remember.   

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast 

and didn't say a word..   

So when I left for the office,   

I felt pretty low   

and somewhat despondent.   

As I walked into my office,   

my secretary Jane said,   

'Good Morning Boss,   

and by the way   

Happy Birthday ! '   

It felt a little better   

that at least someone had remembered.   

I worked until one o'clock ,   

when Jane knocked on my door   

and said, 'You know,   

It's such a beautiful day outside,   

and it is your Birthday,   

what do you say we go out to lunch,   

just you and me..'   

I said, 'Thanks, Jane,   

that's the greatest thing   

I've heard all day.   

Let's go !'   

We went to lunch.   

But we didn't go   

where we normally would go. 

She chose instead at a quiet bistro   

with a private table.   

We had two martinis each   

and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.   

On the way back to the office, 

Jane said, 'You know,   

It's such a beautiful day...   

We don't need to go straight back to the office,   

Do We ?'   

I responded,   

'I guess not.   

What do you have in mind ?'   

She said,   

'Let's drop by my apartment,   

it's just around the corner..' 

  

After arriving at her apartment,   

Jane turned to me and said,

' Boss, if you don't mind,   

I'm going to step into the bedroom   

for just a moment.   

I'll be right back.'   

'Ok.' I nervously replied  

She went into the bedroom and,   

after a couple of minutes,   

she came out   

carrying a huge birthday cake ...   

Followed   

by my wife,   

my kids,   

and dozens of my friends   

and co-workers,   

all singing 'Happy Birthday'. 

  

 

And I just sat there....   

On the couch.....   

Naked.

 At least he had his birthday suit on. LOL



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Posted

llllloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooollllll thats f*'#ing awesome :D:D:D:D

löl i think i pissed myself :D:D

brilliant

Awards


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Posted

so thats what happened to rugger.. now we know the truth



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