hxtr Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 220 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 147 Topic Count: 595 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 16950 Content Per Day: 2.93 Reputation: 13538 Achievement Points: 129714 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 120 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 26, 2023 Birthday: 04/05/1970 Posted July 9, 2012 Chuck Norris lives on The Road Not Taken. Chuck Norris can swim in an empty pool. Chuck Norris sends paper letters through email. Chuck Norris is the fifth Beatle. Chuck Norris walked into a bar. The bar said "Ouch". For Chuck Norris, it does not take two to Tango. When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move. Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answered the wrong phone. Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long. Chuck once round house kicked Superman. The poor guy still believes he can actually fly. There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives. Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet. If you rate this 5 roundhouse kicks, then Chuck Norris WILL roundhouse kick Justin Bieber's ass. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life. Chuck Norris won American Idol using only sign language Once the cop pulled over Chuck Norris....the cop was lucky to leave with a warning. Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land. Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants. Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke....that truck is now known as Optimus Prime. Chuck Norris won the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet, he scares the sh*t out of it Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice. Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him. Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes. Chuck Norris once got bit by a rattle snake........ After three days of pain and agony ..................the rattle snake died Chuck Norris dosent have to shoot a gun, he just has to throw the bullet Chuck Norris once made a joke. Ten people died laughing. Chuck Norris uses the Stairway to Heaven on his light workout days Chuck Norris speaks in surround sound. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live. When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down. The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. Luke wanted to know the ways of the Force. The Force wanted to know the ways of Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together. Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush. Chuck Norris’ calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd - No one fools with Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris doesn't have life insurance, the insurance companies pay him to spare their lives. Chuck Norris can pass an eye exam.....blindfolded! There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live. Chuck Norris never needs a flash light, he just stares into the darkness and it moves out of the way. Chuck Norris does not fart, nothing escapes Chuck Norris BiG CheesE, baldie, BigPapaDean and 1 other 4
hxtr Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 220 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 147 Topic Count: 595 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 16950 Content Per Day: 2.93 Reputation: 13538 Achievement Points: 129714 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 120 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 26, 2023 Birthday: 04/05/1970 Author Posted July 9, 2012 Chuck Norris's once lost power.... now he gets a direct feed from God. hahahahaha Chuck Norris's neighborhood lost their internet connection during a bad storm except Chuck Norris..... he is the internet.
TBB Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 989 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 25 Topic Count: 292 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 21206 Content Per Day: 3.75 Reputation: 22918 Achievement Points: 152131 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 411 Joined: 01/07/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 9 hours ago Birthday: 01/27/1946 Device: Windows Posted July 9, 2012 lol - finally - something worthwhile from the Hxtr - hahaha hxtr and baldie 2 Awards
hxtr Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 220 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 147 Topic Count: 595 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 16950 Content Per Day: 2.93 Reputation: 13538 Achievement Points: 129714 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 120 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 26, 2023 Birthday: 04/05/1970 Author Posted July 9, 2012 what are you babbling about? Quality posts.. nothing but quality i tell you. hahahahaa
pancakes Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 2395 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 19 Topic Count: 40 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 800 Content Per Day: 0.15 Reputation: 217 Achievement Points: 5471 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 04/13/11 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 10, 2024 Birthday: 07/22/1994 Posted July 9, 2012 lol xD Awards
hxtr Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 220 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 147 Topic Count: 595 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 16950 Content Per Day: 2.93 Reputation: 13538 Achievement Points: 129714 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 120 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 26, 2023 Birthday: 04/05/1970 Author Posted July 9, 2012 (edited) Chuck Norris was asked by the three wise men where to find the new baby Jesus. Chuck Norris recommended Jesus as the only son of God. When God creates other universes, he models Chuck Norris but just can quite master him. When Chuck Norris was born... the second coming happened. Edited July 9, 2012 by hxtr
hxtr Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 220 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 147 Topic Count: 595 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 16950 Content Per Day: 2.93 Reputation: 13538 Achievement Points: 129714 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 120 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 26, 2023 Birthday: 04/05/1970 Author Posted July 9, 2012 With the recent discovery of Neutrinos ghostly subatomic particles... Chuck Norris is now not the only thing faster than light but is still the fastest thing. This is fun!!!!!! hahahahahah
TheCheeseyCrusader Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 88 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 32 Topic Count: 249 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3515 Content Per Day: 0.61 Reputation: 1898 Achievement Points: 23147 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 2 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 13 hours ago Birthday: 11/13/1991 Device: Android Posted July 9, 2012 i found the bible! http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/ Awards
hxtr Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 220 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 147 Topic Count: 595 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 16950 Content Per Day: 2.93 Reputation: 13538 Achievement Points: 129714 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 120 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 26, 2023 Birthday: 04/05/1970 Author Posted July 9, 2012 im making up my own so you wont find in no fucking bible. hahahaha
hxtr Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 220 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 147 Topic Count: 595 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 16950 Content Per Day: 2.93 Reputation: 13538 Achievement Points: 129714 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 120 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 26, 2023 Birthday: 04/05/1970 Author Posted July 9, 2012 God secretly wrote the Bible about Chuck Norris.
TBB Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 989 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 25 Topic Count: 292 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 21206 Content Per Day: 3.75 Reputation: 22918 Achievement Points: 152131 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 411 Joined: 01/07/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 9 hours ago Birthday: 01/27/1946 Device: Windows Posted July 9, 2012 Chuck Norris is Hxtr in disguise - hahahahahaha hxtr 1 Awards
DramaLlama Posted July 9, 2012 Member ID: 1443 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 50 Topic Count: 149 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 2299 Content Per Day: 0.42 Reputation: 3789 Achievement Points: 17867 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 14 Joined: 05/24/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: June 8, 2023 Birthday: 02/19/1987 Posted July 9, 2012 baldie, hxtr, billyblade and 1 other 4 Awards
DramaLlama Posted July 10, 2012 Member ID: 1443 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 50 Topic Count: 149 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 2299 Content Per Day: 0.42 Reputation: 3789 Achievement Points: 17867 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 14 Joined: 05/24/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: June 8, 2023 Birthday: 02/19/1987 Posted July 10, 2012 hxtr and JohnnyDos 2 Awards
hxtr Posted July 10, 2012 Member ID: 220 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 147 Topic Count: 595 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 16950 Content Per Day: 2.93 Reputation: 13538 Achievement Points: 129714 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 120 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 26, 2023 Birthday: 04/05/1970 Author Posted July 10, 2012 but Chuck Norris really won.... Chuck is still alive. Bruce is the shit.. hands down. Chuck Norris provided the DNA. JohnnyDos 1
TheCheeseyCrusader Posted July 10, 2012 Member ID: 88 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 32 Topic Count: 249 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3515 Content Per Day: 0.61 Reputation: 1898 Achievement Points: 23147 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 2 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 13 hours ago Birthday: 11/13/1991 Device: Android Posted July 10, 2012 JohnnyDos 1 Awards
JohnnyDos Posted July 10, 2012 Member ID: 77 Group: Fallen Members Followers: 111 Topic Count: 1018 Topics Per Day: 0.18 Content Count: 7527 Content Per Day: 1.30 Reputation: 9175 Achievement Points: 69486 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 47 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 8, 2020 Posted July 10, 2012 I've been laughing since yesterday when I saw HXTR's first post.Some of them are hilarious.Killer jokes.
BigPapaDean Posted July 10, 2012 Member ID: 1128 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 78 Topic Count: 1217 Topics Per Day: 0.22 Content Count: 6581 Content Per Day: 1.17 Reputation: 4445 Achievement Points: 63856 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 6 Joined: 02/13/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 4 hours ago Birthday: 10/21/1954 Device: Windows Posted July 10, 2012 Am sorry HXTR you need an editor to read your post before you post them. I found where you repeated a line and I think it was because you missed 420! "There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live." hxtr 1 Awards
BigPapaDean Posted July 10, 2012 Member ID: 1128 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 78 Topic Count: 1217 Topics Per Day: 0.22 Content Count: 6581 Content Per Day: 1.17 Reputation: 4445 Achievement Points: 63856 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 6 Joined: 02/13/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 4 hours ago Birthday: 10/21/1954 Device: Windows Posted July 10, 2012 I do think these are funny! LOL! Awards
TheCheeseyCrusader Posted July 10, 2012 Member ID: 88 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 32 Topic Count: 249 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3515 Content Per Day: 0.61 Reputation: 1898 Achievement Points: 23147 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 2 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 13 hours ago Birthday: 11/13/1991 Device: Android Posted July 10, 2012 (edited) Kids look under their bed at night for the boogie man but the boogie mans looks under his bed for Chuck Norris Chuck Norris doesnt flush the toilet. He scares the shit out of it When life hands Chuck Norris lemons, He makes orange juice Chuck Norris can play volleyball with a bowlingball Edited July 10, 2012 by Cheese hxtr 1 Awards
GorillaXI Posted July 10, 2012 Member ID: 62 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 73 Topic Count: 480 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 4124 Content Per Day: 0.71 Reputation: 1413 Achievement Points: 27905 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 10 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: July 4, 2015 Birthday: 06/16/1972 Posted July 10, 2012 (edited) You forgot Chuck Norris is also a TEXAN http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/ Edited July 10, 2012 by GorillaXI hxtr 1
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