JohnnyDos Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 77 Group: Fallen Members Followers: 111 Topic Count: 1018 Topics Per Day: 0.18 Content Count: 7527 Content Per Day: 1.31 Reputation: 9175 Achievement Points: 69486 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 47 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 8, 2020 Posted December 17, 2012 (edited) How To Shower Like a Woman Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups / leg-lifts, etc. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins... Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red... Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair. Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tile cleaner. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see partner along the way, cover up any exposed areas. How To Shower Like a Man Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see partner along the way, shake your pecker at her making the 'woo-woo' sound. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your pecker and scratch your ass. Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your ass, leaving those coarse ass hairs stuck on the soap. Wash your hair if you have any. Have a piss. Rinse off a little and get out of shower. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath the whole time. Admire pecker size in mirror again. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass partner, pull off towel, shake your pecker at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again Throw wet towel on bed. I KNOW YOU'RE LAUGHING BECAUSE IT'S TRUE!!!!!! [/indent] Edited December 17, 2012 by JohnnyDos LordOfChaos, little_old_man, KaptCrunch and 11 others 14
Autumnx Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 2490 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 38 Topic Count: 14 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 248 Content Per Day: 0.05 Reputation: 80 Achievement Points: 2240 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 05/11/11 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 30, 2024 Birthday: 04/04/1983 Device: Android Posted December 17, 2012 (edited) LMAO.... Oh yes it's true... Edited December 17, 2012 by Autumnx[GER] Damage_inc- 1 Awards
pwrcrzy52 Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 103 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 43 Topic Count: 698 Topics Per Day: 0.12 Content Count: 3300 Content Per Day: 0.58 Reputation: 1604 Achievement Points: 25692 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 2 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: December 31, 2024 Birthday: 07/10/1952 Device: Windows Posted December 17, 2012 Ok now i can read it LMAO jimboom and TheCheeseyCrusader 2 Awards
Damage_inc- Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 2048 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 294 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 6689 Content Per Day: 1.27 Reputation: 4709 Achievement Points: 48999 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 12/15/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 29, 2023 Birthday: 05/30/1967 Posted December 17, 2012 brilliant. Awards
TBB Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 989 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 25 Topic Count: 290 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 20486 Content Per Day: 3.66 Reputation: 22513 Achievement Points: 147943 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 394 Joined: 01/07/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: 1 hour ago Birthday: 01/27/1946 Device: Windows Posted December 17, 2012 You forgot "Be careful not to trip over pecker because it is hanging down and not held in by anything" Awards
Yop Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 1719 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 18 Topic Count: 71 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 1982 Content Per Day: 0.37 Reputation: 518 Achievement Points: 12060 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 08/21/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 29 Birthday: 04/03/1981 Device: Windows Posted December 17, 2012 damnit that's so true! Awards
7Toes Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 87 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 58 Topic Count: 98 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 3789 Content Per Day: 0.66 Reputation: 3589 Achievement Points: 27251 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 7 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: March 18, 2022 Birthday: 04/02/1871 Posted December 17, 2012 now thats funny shit there Awards
RIP>XI< Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 1684 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 27 Topic Count: 139 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 2146 Content Per Day: 0.40 Reputation: 944 Achievement Points: 13782 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 3 Joined: 08/12/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 6 Birthday: 11/16/1971 Device: Windows Posted December 17, 2012 lolll it's true Awards
BigPapaDean Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 1128 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 78 Topic Count: 1210 Topics Per Day: 0.22 Content Count: 6553 Content Per Day: 1.18 Reputation: 4430 Achievement Points: 63653 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 6 Joined: 02/13/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: March 18 Birthday: 10/21/1954 Device: Windows Posted December 17, 2012 Well you hit my ex on the head for sure and yes I laughed because I know a few guys just like that! lol! jimboom 1 Awards
Janey Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 434 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 58 Topic Count: 272 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 1289 Content Per Day: 0.23 Reputation: 1448 Achievement Points: 12930 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 09/17/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 13 Device: iPhone Posted December 17, 2012 wow, exchange pecker for boobies and I shower like a man...lol Wraith and jimboom 2 Awards
Dirk Diggler Posted December 17, 2012 Member ID: 98 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 68 Topic Count: 23 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 3588 Content Per Day: 0.63 Reputation: 1004 Achievement Points: 20709 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 11 hours ago Birthday: 05/29/1968 Device: Windows Posted December 17, 2012 Yup..............Sir JohnnyD......... Awards
WeednFeed Posted December 18, 2012 Member ID: 433 Group: ++ COD4 Admin Followers: 42 Topic Count: 366 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 2639 Content Per Day: 0.46 Reputation: 4221 Achievement Points: 26715 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 48 Joined: 09/17/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 9 hours ago Birthday: 05/28/1957 Device: iPhone Posted December 18, 2012 AT WEED'S AGE IF YOU MAKE SURE TO WEAR YOUR BI-FOCAL'S YOU CAN LOOK DOWN A REALLY BE HAPPY ABOUT THE SIZE OF YOUR PECKER AS LONG AS YOU CAN SEE PAST YOU GUT! Weed loves Bi-focal glasses! lolololololol Awards
Teleck Posted December 20, 2012 Member ID: 601 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 2 Topic Count: 52 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 389 Content Per Day: 0.07 Reputation: 69 Achievement Points: 2583 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/20/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 22, 2016 Birthday: 07/13/1967 Posted December 20, 2012 lol great one
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