HarryWeezer Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 20166 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 40 Topic Count: 611 Topics Per Day: 0.16 Content Count: 7653 Content Per Day: 1.97 Reputation: 7228 Achievement Points: 53668 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 36 Joined: 10/04/13 Status: Offline Last Seen: Monday at 02:23 PM Birthday: 10/16/1946 Device: Windows Share Posted October 18, 2011 I have reached official oldfartdomness. This occurs when the federal government instructs you to sign up for Medicare, which I had to do yesterday after turning 65 this past Sunday. And so, I now lay claim to the myriad of benefits available to official Old Farts, including, but not limited to: - I get ALL the discounts. I even get discounts where discounts aren't offered simply by raising hell - they'll give me a discount to get rid of me. - I'm more likely to get a mercy fuck. "Aw, that poor old man could probably use a good blow job." - I know longer have to "respect my elders." Now, everyone has to respect ME!! - I don't have to remember anything. People don't expect me to remember anything. I can plead forgetfullness for anything people expect me to remember. - I can tell young punks to fuck off without getting punched because even they believe it's not kosher to punch out an old man who can't defend himself. - I may now break wind or pee anywhere, even right on the street, blaming "Old Timer's Disease." - I can tell the wife that "George" just isn't up to it tonight and she'll leave me alone without a lot of bullshit. - I can demand immediate attention from salespeople and be excused for swearing up a bloody storm. - I can ask people to lift heavy objects for me and they'll gladly oblige, such as loading that heavy carton into the car because everybody wants to help an Old Fart. - I can leave any event, at any time, with the excuse that "I'm tired," and be forgiven for it. - I can leave the shopping cart anywhere, or plow down the supermarket aisle, ramming carts out of my way, pretending to be "confused." - I can cut in front of lines on the pretense that I'm about to a heart attack, or take traffic shortcuts like driving the wrong way on a one-way street without the cops giving me a ticket. - But the best thing about being an official Old Fart is that I may publicly comment on young women's lovely tits or nicely-rounded asses, and instead of a slap in the face, hear a giggle about that cute old man, because they know I'm completely harmless and probably can't even get it up any more. And for the most part, I can't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Pharticus Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 1320 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 7 Topic Count: 37 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 611 Content Per Day: 0.12 Reputation: 357 Achievement Points: 4498 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 04/10/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: August 10, 2020 Birthday: 01/14/1976 Share Posted October 18, 2011 - But the best thing about being an official Old Fart is that I may publicly comment on young women's lovely tits or nicely-rounded asses, and instead of a slap in the face, hear a giggle about that cute old man, because they know I'm completely harmless and probably can't even get it up any more. And for the most part, I can't. And you may now commence taking your weekly ( or is it daily?) ration of Viagra. Congrats Harry! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
billyblade Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 34 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 47 Topic Count: 182 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 2097 Content Per Day: 0.39 Reputation: 1003 Achievement Points: 14880 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 1 Joined: 09/01/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 12, 2018 Birthday: 04/29/1966 Share Posted October 18, 2011 65 is the new 45 aint it...and i'm 45...so am i really 25?? it's all so confusing......anyways, arent you supposed to be shopping for a nice new sports car or something, the kind that makes people say" look at that ride, was that some old guy driving it?" Dont forget, your supposed to pull your pants up about 4 more inches and wear black socks with any pair of shorts........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
2_MANY_BEERS Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 96 Group: ** Registered Users Followers: 107 Topic Count: 1048 Topics Per Day: 0.20 Content Count: 8812 Content Per Day: 1.64 Reputation: 3298 Achievement Points: 62176 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 29 Birthday: 06/30/1954 Device: Windows Share Posted October 18, 2011 Congrats Harry Don't see ya on the Senior Clan Member List. Don't see anyone on there. We have no senior clan members? How old do you have to be? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hunter1948 Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 1850 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 98 Topic Count: 328 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 8620 Content Per Day: 1.73 Reputation: 4222 Achievement Points: 55994 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 5 Joined: 09/29/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 29, 2023 Birthday: 06/19/1948 Device: Windows Share Posted October 18, 2011 Go to Home Depot and get some miracle grow for your problem. Congrats on becoming mature. LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
hxtr Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 220 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 147 Topic Count: 595 Topics Per Day: 0.11 Content Count: 16950 Content Per Day: 3.16 Reputation: 13538 Achievement Points: 129713 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 120 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 26, 2023 Birthday: 04/05/1970 Device: Windows Share Posted October 18, 2011 love that last one Harry... now that sounds like fun. but all that was funny. Kick ass your 65 and a very happy birthday to you. So cool we have so many old farts in XI.. but sorry Harry.. think a few are older than you. You dont get a medal for being the oldest but I think Rockape needs to create a medal for age 60 and above.. so we can show you all the right amount of respect when we tell you to fuck off. hahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RD Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 2520 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 5 Topic Count: 50 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 627 Content Per Day: 0.13 Reputation: 48 Achievement Points: 3748 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 05/23/11 Status: Offline Last Seen: January 16, 2018 Birthday: 08/18/1953 Share Posted October 18, 2011 Now you can get Rockape to change your name to Harry Geezer. Congrats man!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HarryWeezer Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 20166 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 40 Topic Count: 611 Topics Per Day: 0.16 Content Count: 7653 Content Per Day: 1.97 Reputation: 7228 Achievement Points: 53668 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 36 Joined: 10/04/13 Status: Offline Last Seen: Monday at 02:23 PM Birthday: 10/16/1946 Device: Windows Author Share Posted October 18, 2011 Pharticus - But the best thing about being an official Old Fart is that I may publicly comment on young women's lovely tits or nicely-rounded asses, and instead of a slap in the face, hear a giggle about that cute old man, because they know I'm completely harmless and probably can't even get it up any more. And for the most part, I can't. And you may now commence taking your weekly ( or is it daily?) ration of Viagra. Congrats Harry! It's funny when you think about. ALL women want to be complimented. They ALL wants us to think they have nice tits and asses. They just don't want us to say so directly because they believe that unless men are old farts, they just want to screw them. Andf that's certainly true. What they don't know is that we old farts ALSO want to screw them!!! Our bodies might be old, but our minds aren't. And if you're 65, your wife is probably also 65 - or close to it. And who in hell wants to screw a 65-year-old woman? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
MadMonk64 Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 1959 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 114 Topic Count: 75 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 272 Content Per Day: 0.06 Reputation: 95 Achievement Points: 2569 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 11/09/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: July 26, 2022 Birthday: 05/30/1946 Share Posted October 18, 2011 AH YES!!! Glad to have you join us in the 65 and Older Division of the XTREMEIDIOTS. Don't forget to ask for that wheelchair when you get to the Airports, saves a lot of time, go through security first, load on plane first, someone else carries your bags(i.e. the wife) etc.etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
BiG CheesE Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 589 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 12 Topic Count: 347 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 1346 Content Per Day: 0.25 Reputation: 341 Achievement Points: 10798 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/18/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 25 Birthday: 07/04/1979 Device: Android Share Posted October 18, 2011 wow you old farts rly living the sweet life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
LtLaszlo Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 151 Group: ++ COD2 Admin Followers: 62 Topic Count: 186 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 9148 Content Per Day: 1.70 Reputation: 24320 Achievement Points: 94258 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 316 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 5 hours ago Birthday: 05/17/1959 Device: Kindle Fire Share Posted October 18, 2011 RD Now you can get Rockape to change your name to Harry Geezer. Congrats man!! Good one RD!! Nice post Harry. Those are funny and sad but true!! And Happy Birthday!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
PimpedOutPete Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 174 Group: +++ COD2 Head Admin Followers: 129 Topic Count: 387 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 14888 Content Per Day: 2.77 Reputation: 7828 Achievement Points: 91102 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 52 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: 33 minutes ago Birthday: 04/23/1970 Device: Macintosh Share Posted October 18, 2011 Congrats on the promotion... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Bushape Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 839 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 18 Topic Count: 83 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 1334 Content Per Day: 0.25 Reputation: 64 Achievement Points: 7776 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/05/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: August 12, 2020 Birthday: 07/17/1958 Share Posted October 18, 2011 Sounds like fun Harry too bad you have to be old to get all of the perks. But what the hell you deserve after putting up with all of the shit in life. Have a good one, now you can leave the toilet seat up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Blackbart Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 51 Group: Fallen Members Followers: 51 Topic Count: 342 Topics Per Day: 0.06 Content Count: 5974 Content Per Day: 1.11 Reputation: 3766 Achievement Points: 45818 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 1 Joined: 09/01/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 27, 2021 Birthday: 06/26/1949 Share Posted October 18, 2011 hxtr love that last one Harry... now that sounds like fun. but all that was funny. Kick ass your 65 and a very happy birthday to you. So cool we have so many old farts in XI.. but sorry Harry.. think a few are older than you. You dont get a medal for being the oldest but I think Rockape needs to create a medal for age 60 and above.. so we can show you all the right amount of respect when we tell you to fuck off. hahaha We do have a 60+ medal to identify all us incompetent old foggies... I forgot to add Happy belated B-Day Buddy... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
hxtr Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 220 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 147 Topic Count: 595 Topics Per Day: 0.11 Content Count: 16950 Content Per Day: 3.16 Reputation: 13538 Achievement Points: 129713 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 120 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 26, 2023 Birthday: 04/05/1970 Device: Windows Share Posted October 18, 2011 Blackbart hxtr love that last one Harry... now that sounds like fun. but all that was funny. Kick ass your 65 and a very happy birthday to you. So cool we have so many old farts in XI.. but sorry Harry.. think a few are older than you. You dont get a medal for being the oldest but I think Rockape needs to create a medal for age 60 and above.. so we can show you all the right amount of respect when we tell you to fuck off. hahaha We do have a 60+ medal to identify all us incompetent old foggies... I forgot to add Happy belated B-Day Buddy... Sweet.. that was super fast.. great work Rockape.. hahahaha what else can I suggest. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sgt Alvin York Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 927 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 4 Topic Count: 5 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 110 Content Per Day: 0.02 Reputation: 26 Achievement Points: 732 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/25/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: November 1, 2015 Birthday: 08/24/1956 Share Posted October 18, 2011 Nice post Harry ...Congrats to making it to your Olden Golden Years. You missed one.. You may now put the Depends to the top of the stuff in your shopping cart instead of burying it under the Prune Juice, Denture Cream and Beano. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sabreeyes Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 1642 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 22 Topic Count: 72 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 900 Content Per Day: 0.18 Reputation: 241 Achievement Points: 6952 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 08/05/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: June 3, 2016 Birthday: 07/30/1958 Share Posted October 18, 2011 Happy Birthday Harry, enjoy your bennies you earned it. I got 12 more years to get mine, hope I make it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NumNutz Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 1022 Group: Fallen Members Followers: 44 Topic Count: 52 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 8504 Content Per Day: 1.62 Reputation: 27633 Achievement Points: 81318 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 397 Joined: 01/14/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: May 31, 2020 Birthday: 07/19/1962 Share Posted October 18, 2011 Congrats you old fart, I like the Geezer part tho, good call RD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noears711XI Posted October 18, 2011 Member ID: 238 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 189 Topic Count: 75 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2162 Content Per Day: 0.40 Reputation: 1940 Achievement Points: 19609 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 1 Joined: 09/04/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: October 8, 2022 Birthday: 07/09/1957 Share Posted October 18, 2011 God Bless you my Brother may I you continue gaming for many more years to come. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
USAPLISKEN Posted October 19, 2011 Member ID: 1634 Group: **- Inactive Registered Users Followers: 26 Topic Count: 210 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 1634 Content Per Day: 0.32 Reputation: 370 Achievement Points: 12427 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 08/03/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: June 28, 2016 Birthday: 04/19/1949 Share Posted October 19, 2011 SgtHarryWeezer Pharticus - But the best thing about being an official Old Fart is that I may publicly comment on young women's lovely tits or nicely-rounded asses, and instead of a slap in the face, hear a giggle about that cute old man, because they know I'm completely harmless and probably can't even get it up any more. And for the most part, I can't. And you may now commence taking your weekly ( or is it daily?) ration of Viagra. Congrats Harry! It's funny when you think about. ALL women want to be complimented. They ALL wants us to think they have nice tits and asses. They just don't want us to say so directly because they believe that unless men are old farts, they just want to screw them. Andf that's certainly true. What they don't know is that we old farts ALSO want to screw them!!! Our bodies might be old, but our minds aren't. And if you're 65, your wife is probably also 65 - or close to it. And who in hell wants to screw a 65-year-old woman? I know i'm going to get shit for this but i'm on wife #5 and she is 20yrs younger than me Big TiTs nice skin and not a BITCH when that happens will be looking for #6 and she already knows it I have brought it up a time or 2. Happy B D Harry right behind you i'm 62 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Merlin007 Posted October 19, 2011 Member ID: 2068 Group: +++ COD5 Head Admin Followers: 69 Topic Count: 1076 Topics Per Day: 0.22 Content Count: 8445 Content Per Day: 1.73 Reputation: 7326 Achievement Points: 75057 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 64 Joined: 12/25/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: Wednesday at 02:30 PM Birthday: 05/23/1973 Device: Windows Share Posted October 19, 2011 Well, Happy belated Birthday old man! Does that now make you Sgt. Harry Geezer! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Merlin007 Posted October 19, 2011 Member ID: 2068 Group: +++ COD5 Head Admin Followers: 69 Topic Count: 1076 Topics Per Day: 0.22 Content Count: 8445 Content Per Day: 1.73 Reputation: 7326 Achievement Points: 75057 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 64 Joined: 12/25/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: Wednesday at 02:30 PM Birthday: 05/23/1973 Device: Windows Share Posted October 19, 2011 RD Now you can get Rockape to change your name to Harry Geezer. Congrats man!! HAHA. Just reading the rest of the post and saw you had the same idea for a name change. lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
HarryWeezer Posted October 19, 2011 Member ID: 20166 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 40 Topic Count: 611 Topics Per Day: 0.16 Content Count: 7653 Content Per Day: 1.97 Reputation: 7228 Achievement Points: 53668 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 36 Joined: 10/04/13 Status: Offline Last Seen: Monday at 02:23 PM Birthday: 10/16/1946 Device: Windows Author Share Posted October 19, 2011 Merlin007 RD Now you can get Rockape to change your name to Harry Geezer. Congrats man!! HAHA. Just reading the rest of the post and saw you had the same idea for a name change. lol. OK, I'm thinking about it. Thanks RD/others. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
DEEJAYKEG Posted October 19, 2011 Member ID: 1238 Group: ***- Inactive Clan Members Followers: 35 Topic Count: 1207 Topics Per Day: 0.23 Content Count: 6083 Content Per Day: 1.17 Reputation: 4984 Achievement Points: 50727 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 11 Joined: 03/12/10 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 11 Device: Kindle Fire Share Posted October 19, 2011 Belated Happy Birthday, Harry! There are many quotations about ageing but this one is among my favourites... "There is no pleasure worth forgoing just for an extra three years in the geriatric ward." ~John Mortimer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
Unchileno Posted October 19, 2011 Member ID: 101 Group: *** Clan Members Followers: 109 Topic Count: 764 Topics Per Day: 0.14 Content Count: 8133 Content Per Day: 1.51 Reputation: 6747 Achievement Points: 61498 Solved Content: 0 Days Won: 13 Joined: 09/02/09 Status: Offline Last Seen: April 27 Birthday: 01/23/1974 Device: iPhone Share Posted October 19, 2011 Conratz Man!.. 1 Question? Do I have to speak louder or SCREAM my ass off now when we game? P.S Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Awards
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