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Posted

I made a post last June about my sister being ill. Her health has been up and down since then, but today it took a dramatic turn for the worse and she's not expected to see tomorrow's sunset. Her kidneys began failing earlier today and her other organs are expected to shut down shortly. She is at home with hospice and her husband and daughter are making her as comfortable as possible.

The worst part of having a family member terminally ill is really just waiting for them to die. It's hard for everyone. My sister went on hospice last week and even with the Alzheimer's at it's worse, every time she saw the hospice nurse she knew she was going soon. There was no more hiding it from her and I think that has lead to her downfall: her realization of reality.  Last week she asked the nurse if she would be here for Christmas, she always throws a party for the entire family, the nurse said she may make it another couple of months. 

I can't stop crying. My sister and I weren't very close like in most families because she is 20 years my senior and was married when I was 8 months old, but for my family, we are as close as we would ever get. She is a different generation than me. Our parents raised us differently. It's like our parents had 2 sets of kids, Jimmy and DD (Anne) and then 17 years later they had Joe, Johnny and me, Kathy (only my family calls me that so please don't. it would hurt).

Please don't say that she'll be out of pain or in a better place. Everyone keeps saying that and I just want to punch their faces. I've been through this before. (My mother was an invalid for years prior to having a stroke and being brain dead with a body kept alive by machines.) I don't understand why ppl keep saying these meaningless platitudes. They don't help after you've heard them over and over.  You don't need to say anything, it is what it is. People die. It just hurts.

My son is going to take me to see her tomorrow if she makes it through the night. Hopefully her Alzheimer's will keep her from remembering how poor her health is. They say ignorance is bliss. If that's true I must be the smartest person on the planet.



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Posted

Janey,  I know that no words can comfort you right now, but know that you are in everyone's prayers and that we are all here for you.



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Posted

Wow Janey... very sorry to hear all that. 20 years spread is quite a gap in time. If your folks are still alive.. it is very sad as parents should no out live their kids.



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Posted

just hold her hand and talk to her and that will give her some comfort being surrounded by people who love her .if she doesnt open here eyes she is still aware of your presence.so best thing you can do is spend some time by her side .hang in there girl.



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Posted

Very sorry to hear this Janey. I hope you get some time to spend with her to say your good byes.



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Posted

thanks. Sorry I vented about platitudes. I'm guilty of using them, too.



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Posted

Praying for strength for you and your family Janey



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Posted

I some what understand your pain of loss ....You and the family are in my prayers!! God Bless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



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Posted

sorry to here about your sister you are in my prayers.



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Posted

A great sister you are, an asset to the world Janey love...



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Posted

Thoughts and prayers to you in this sad time in your life.



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Posted

I'm so sorry Janey. Thinking of you.



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Posted

courage janey , désolé d apprendre ca , penseé a toi et ta famille



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Posted

thanks. Sorry I vented about platitudes. I'm guilty of using them, too.

It's okay who hasn't used them but you are right! They have no real source of comfort. People say them because they want to help and don't know how. Tho there is a Bible verse I use that really makes it real to me: Psalm 116:15

Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints.

Psalm 116:14-16

 

Hope it helps in some small way! 



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Posted

stay strong & keep your eyes on your goals, do not lose focus.

everything else will take care of itself.

lots of love & prayers to you and your family!



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Posted

Just find ur inner strength...its amazing what it can do when u find it and let it out, trust me.  Sending thoughts and prayers to you :)



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Posted

you and you fam are in my prayers janey. x 



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Posted

Sorry Janey.



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Posted

The Landshark crew is praying for you and your family. May God give you all peace.

 

Gary



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Posted

My brother, Joe, is picking me up and we are going across the lake to see her. My other brother, Johnny, is meeting us there. She stopped speaking for the most part, and when she does it's sometimes to people who are already dead. I don't know if she sees them or is hallucinating due to the morphine, but it's freaky.

I'll update later today.

And thank you for your words of support. They mean a lot to me.



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Posted

my thoughts are with you are your family Janey xx

 

Big hugs

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Posted

I'm so sorry Janey  . i praying for you and your family


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