What is worth living for?

[RANDALL]

I have struggled with depression for the last nine years. I am not suicidal (anymore), and I have faith in God, but I am 26 and I haven't found anything worth living for yet. It's to the point where I don't care if I die. My generation is full of cowards and people who judge you for things you cannot change. My glass is neither half full or half empty, it is broken. I am hardwired to think worst case scenario, and always prepare for it, and that helps as an Engineer, but I don't have faith in people and I don't trust anyone. It is hard for me to set goals. I go to work, come home, distract myself with video games, etc, go to bed, and repeat. In the back of my mind, I imagine dying well before I can retire, or even pay off my student loans. I just feel like my life is slipping away, so I was just wondering, ... what is worth living for?

[Icequeen]

Randall! There is so much to live for. You have to find it. I know its easier said then done but the world holds so much beauty. Travel a little. Visit another country. Another culture. You never know you might find solace somewhere you never expected.

[ANGUS]

Hey.. I'm not even going to pretend to know your situation and pretend I have all the answers. But Ill be the first to give you my thoughts without rambling.. First off, Screw the loans, Those will take care of themselves.. Second Your right this generation including my very own son which I love very much doesn't have a grip on what they should be concentrating on ( he's 19 so I get it , But I had a path at his age, I think more should  at younger ages instead of floating for ever.).. Worry about your world and whats in front of you, Not things you can't control. If you want to control more then set yourself in that direction and make changes in the world the right way. With intelligence and compassion.  I trust every one till I'm screwed over, Then I leave them behind, Do the same, life is easier that way and it pays off for you in the long run.. So now is it worth living for...? Yes ,But only if you make it.. No one else will. Crazy example, This weekend, XI fest. You could have come and meet wonder people from all over the world..You could make new friends , New contacts for work maybe or just meet someone that maybe when you needed that one person to talk to make the day right ...

 

Start with yourself. Get a new hobby, Like me when i was younger. I did everything I could get my hands. Your a very bright young man,That evident from being a engineer. So do something that takes those skills, Build rc planes or boats  or helicopters and join a club like a did in Orlando..  Join a indoor soccer league.. Anything you like.. Point is start with yourself.. Once you do the rest will come easy cause people will see a new you and want to know you.. The real Randall.. So is it worth it...? Yes cause young men like you will be the men of that help the next generation proceed and make it.. Make your self count and make a difference people see.. Yes lifes a bitch some times , More and more  every day cause of the world we live in... But make a difference in yourself, Then make a difference in the world and it will count!! and yes... As you asked, Worth it.... Were here for you more ways then you might realize, I met a wonder group idiots this weekend that I know would move heaven and earth  if asked of  them..  And yes you can laugh at my spelling and grammar skills

[Sammy]

Every generation has been like that. So no need to be concerned about that as though yours is somehow different. Mine says the same thing. There is no such thing as 'the good ol days'. The judgemental people? Fuck em. Tell them to mind their own business. To answer your question, what makes you happy? Doesnt have to be some grandiose thing. If you dont know the answer then that is the first step.

As someone with an Avengers avatar, maybe you enjoy creative things. 'Randall.... smash!'

[Icequeen]

What Sammy said. Who cares what anyone thinks of you. Those that care for you won't judge you or leave you. Come to the next xi fest. I will buy you a beer my friend. Have some fun.

Edited September 19, 2017 by Icequeen

[WldPenguin]

Very well put, @Angus.........I don't think I could've said it any better

[Unchileno]

15 minutes ago, ANGU5 said:

Hey.. I'm not even going to pretend to know your situation and pretend I have all the answers. But Ill be the first to give you my thoughts without rambling.. First off, Screw the loans, Those will take care of themselves.. Second Your right this generation including my very own son which I love very much doesn't have a grip on what they should be concentrating on ( he's 19 so I get it , But I had a path at his age, I think more should  at younger ages instead of floating for ever.).. Worry about your world and whats in front of you, Not things you can't control. If you want to control more then set yourself in that direction and make changes in the world the right way. With intelligence and compassion.  I trust every one till I'm screwed over, Then I leave them behind, Do the same, life is easier that way and it pays off for you in the long run.. So now is it worth living for...? Yes ,But only if you make it.. No one else will. Crazy example, This weekend, XI fest. You could have come and meet wonder people from all over the world..You could make new friends , New contacts for work maybe or just meet someone that maybe when you needed that one person to talk to make the day right ...

 

Start with yourself. Get a new hobby, Like me when i was younger. I did everything I could get my hands. Your a very bright young man,That evident from being a engineer. So do something that takes those skills, Build rc planes or boats  or helicopters and join a club like a did in Orlando..  Join a indoor soccer league.. Anything you like.. Point is start with yourself.. Once you do the rest will come easy cause people will see a new you and want to know you.. The real Randall.. So is it worth it...? Yes cause young men like you will be the men of that help the next generation proceed and make it.. Make your self count and make a difference people see.. Yes lifes a bitch some times , More and more  every day cause of the world we live in... But make a difference in yourself, Then make a difference in the world and it will count!! and yes... As you asked, Worth it.... Were here for you more ways then you might realize, I met a wonder group idiots this weekend that I know would move heaven and earth  if asked of  them..  And yes you can laugh at my spelling and grammar skills

This is why I wish  WE had the Titanic moment.

 

 

[Unchileno]

Randall...I wont give you a like on this because I think life is too beautiful to think like this..Having said that..

Would like to  lend you an ear if you want to scream on it and get it out..

Peace brother

 

[BlackRose]

if you have someone you can talk to then talk to them,,are you on meds of any kind? Dont let ppl make your life misrible you have to look inside your self to make you happy and surrond yourself with ppl that make you happy

[FRENCHI]

je vous donne un défis : la vie est le plus grand trésor sur terre , a vous d essayer de comprendre pourquoi et comment  , les XI vous ont déjà donné quelques réponses

[TheLastColdBeer]

Randall, this life is a gift. All yours, and no one can live it for you, or tell you how to live it. You are free to choose your path, for good or ill, as you see fit.

I still wake up every day with wonder at this creation, and what each day holds. I guess what makes this life precious for me, is being useful and productive to others. Going to work, meeting challenges, and being as good as your word.

Another friend is coming home under hospice care, and I'll spend time with Rich while his life passes. Ain't fun, but it's part of the cradle to grave saga. I'm still in awe of my wife for all she endured before dying, and can't let Lori down by forgetting what a magnificent prize life is.

[Super Max]

For my Kids

[bds1961]

Angus put it very well.  Your generation looks for the instant gratification in things. That leaves little room for truly enjoying or seeing what is around you. Sets expectations that are so hard to reach on a daily basis.    Slow down and take the time to look around you and not judge but just look. There is so much around on a daily basis that slides by and is never scene are enjoyed as most look for that thrill.  This constant assault from social media is so destructive. 99% of what you see from friends and others are there life's highlight reel.  No one ever posts ( like you.  That I think is great ) that there having a tough time or really talk about what's going on within them.  We all have tough times.  The last 6 years for me has been hell but I still find so many things to see and enjoy. Just open the eyes and the mind and look for it.  Allow yourself to do things outside of your comfort zone. Doesn't have to be anything wild. Think of the biggest baddest 1% biker that would scare the living crap out of you. Give them a baby to play with and they generally will make a ass out of there self playing with the baby make baby noises and laughing and playing peek a boo with the baby.  It's funny but a lot of people now will not do that to often in fear of what others might think.  It's the simple things the odd things that bring happiness.  Take the time to look deep within you and learn who you are and what triggers that happiness with in you. What do you really enjoy are think you would enjoy and go after it.   If it doesn't work out so what you tried and find that next thing and go after it too.   

[Sammy]

Yes. Some advice if you dont already follow it. Stay away from facebook. Twitter. And all of the myraid open forums. Including visiting or reading it. They are full of dumbasses and downright mean sons of bitches that dont give what you think a second thought. If at all. The worst black holes of society that will eventually swallow you whole.

I never had a facebook account and dont want one. Used twitter maybe once. Had it up to here with open forums trying to have adult conversations inundated with bullshit trolls everywhere flooding them. Back in the day it was the flamer. Fan the flames and watch. However the modern troll is much meaner and personal (hence the phrase 'dont feed the troll'). Social media and anonymity without consequences is a bad combo. So mostly ditched those as well.  I feel much better for it.

[Giggles]

I've been in your shoes all my life but somehow I've gotten threw it ... When my husband died I tried to take my life without God knowing I took it but could not do it cuz I had kids who needed a mom ...I'm very glad I could not think of the way cuz I enjoy my life now cuz I know nobody is promised a tomorrow and you've got to live for now .. I am not sure what brings you joy but you've gotta find it and embrace it with everything in you cuz that's what's going to give u the want to keep going.

[L!ckALotAPus]

Randal! stop! just think have you tried living for your self? and taking care of others 2nd? try it for a change up. you might like it from time to time

and don't let that shot gun cool off to long

[Sammy]

What else? Licking a lot a pus. And there is a lot out there to lick. Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to find the pus you like liking more than any other. Good luck Randall. 

[Super Max]

17 hours ago, bds1961 said:

Angus put it very well.  Your generation looks for the instant gratification in things. That leaves little room for truly enjoying or seeing what is around you. Sets expectations that are so hard to reach on a daily basis.    Slow down and take the time to look around you and not judge but just look. There is so much around on a daily basis that slides by and is never scene are enjoyed as most look for that thrill.  This constant assault from social media is so destructive. 99% of what you see from friends and others are there life's highlight reel.  No one ever posts ( like you.  That I think is great ) that there having a tough time or really talk about what's going on within them.  We all have tough times.  The last 6 years for me has been hell but I still find so many things to see and enjoy. Just open the eyes and the mind and look for it.  Allow yourself to do things outside of your comfort zone. Doesn't have to be anything wild. Think of the biggest baddest 1% biker that would scare the living crap out of you. Give them a baby to play with and they generally will make a ass out of there self playing with the baby make baby noises and laughing and playing peek a boo with the baby.  It's funny but a lot of people now will not do that to often in fear of what others might think.  It's the simple things the odd things that bring happiness.  Take the time to look deep within you and learn who you are and what triggers that happiness with in you. What do you really enjoy are think you would enjoy and go after it.   If it doesn't work out so what you tried and find that next thing and go after it too.   

The happiness and joy in your life there you are responsible for. You only live once enjoy it. Enjoy the little things and do not look at what another has. Am open to others and give them the light in the eyes. Happiness and true love are not for sale. I too have a suicide attempt was declared incapacitated for work when I considered. Am through a deep valley gone but came back strong from there thanks to my loved ones. Am now at the service of society and do volunteer work that I still can do. Now the joy I get from there to life.

[deerejon]

Randall,

Angus really said it best but I will add my 2 cents. I really think it IS a generational thing in that when I was your age and even younger I craved independence. Not saying you don't but to that end I left home at 18, struggled, worked, got fired, got evicted for late rent, ate mac and cheese and ramien noodles. I even donated blood for $7.00 and cookies and juice to get a meal.

But through it all I had live friends to struggle with...what I mean is that we parents today shelter our children and get them phones and internet and  that in turn gives them no motivation. When I was young and hungry I had to work through it....my son just comes up out of the basement and eats. They communicate online and rarely interact with living breathing people. They may have thousands of online friends but real life interaction becomes difficult.

Get up everyday and go to work. Go out every weekend and find people.  Disconnect from the internet and go fishing, swimming, hang gliding...whatever...you will meet like minded people to share your interests with and then you'll find life long friends and even a life long partner.....

But its a scary journey and difficult to start....but once undertaken will change your outlook. It may take weeks months or even years to get there but honestly when I remember all my struggles what comes through loudest is the great times in between...

Life seems daunting but really its a blast. No one....not me or anyone you see is happy all the time....life is a series of hard times broken up by fantastic times....

I hope this doesn't just sound like cheerleading rhetoric because it isn't,,,,,its how I really feel and live.....work all day and love my peeps and time in between. Good Luck and remember its a journey and it wont start unless you take steps....

Be well Buddy, we're all here for ya!!! (even if we are your online friends, which I just advocated against...lol...)