This is my introduction...because I have too.

[JoeCamel]

Hello,

I guess I’m supposed to introduce myself so I can finally be part of your online gang  so let me start with a little history.

Because of my family’s history I will not use any names in this short autobiography.  My mother and father met in Daugavpils, Latvia at University in 1955.  My father was one of the youngest Physics professors at University and my mother was a graduate student.  After some reluctance on my father’s part they began seeing each other and married in 1960.   I was born in Kuldīga, Latvia in June of 1965.  We moved to Ventspils , Latvia in 1966 because my mother began working for the Soviet Irbene Locator, which was in charge of spying on NATO countries’ communications.  She was head of the cryptology section and focused on European countries.  After two years we moved to Skrunda , Latvia to be closer to my father and where my mother began working at the Skrunda Radar Station.  The radar stations main task was to control the cosmic space over Western Europe and North America, and to “intercept” ballistic missiles should any be fired at the Soviet Union.

My father, who took a position in the Science and Engineering school at Liepāja University in 1961 would stay in Liepāja for weeks at a time.  However, what he was really doing was working for the KGB.  He was in charge of moving and tracking so called “immigrants” across the Baltic Sea to Sweden.  The so called “immigrants” were actually western trained KGB intelligence agents who actively infiltrated European countries and even the United States for espionage and other spy craft.  You could say he was a spy master.

Because my father was a physics professor he was well suited to oversee the development of devices and techniques employed in KGB spy craft.  One such device was a sound wave generator that would send sound pulses which were beyond human hearing and could make someone ill in order to force them from a their location.  For example, if an agent wanted to infiltrate a room to search for information he could make the occupants ill whereby forcing them to leave the location to seek treatment and allow the agent unfettered access to materials and documents.  This device is still in use today as far as I know.

Disenchanted with soviet rule and the failed promise of socialism, in 1980 my father and mother contacted the CIA to make a deal to get them out of Latvia.  The CIA required they work as double agents to gain access to a top secret list of agents that my father had access to.  This lasted for about a year when we were able to finally take a fishing boat in the dead of night from the port of Liepāja to Gedser, Denmark.  We couldn’t go to Stockholm because there were too many Soviets that would recognize my father and the intelligence apparatus would pick up on our movements.   We then made our way to Kolding, Denmark and after several days we made it to London, England.   We stayed in London for a few months where we obtained new identities and passports. Finally, we flew to the United States and settled in Temperance, Michigan where I graduated in 1983.

Now if you read all this and wondered if this story would make a great novel, maybe it would but it’s all bull shit!  I just took 5 minutes of your time that you’ll never get back…Happy Holidays!  Please don’t tell anyone and just encourage them to read it too.

Edited December 31, 2018 by JoeCamel

[Icequeen]

Omg  best intro ever! 

[TBB]

We are a clan of >IDIOTS<  - what makes you think we can read and if we could , that we have an attention span of more that 5 seconds - jokes on you -           (nice intro)

 

[RobMc]

I could sense hxtr getting excited, he'll be disappointed now, great intro.

[FUNky]

TLDR

[ANGUS]

Its to long to read ,  we know you.. but if you join cool .. if not o well....... ...................  Fucker !!  about time!

[ANGUS]

3 hours ago, JoeCamel said:

Hello,

I guess I’m supposed to introduce myself so I can finally be part of your online gang  so let me start with a little history.

Because of my family’s history I will not use any names in this short autobiography.  My mother and father met in Daugavpils, Latvia at University in 1955.  My father was one of the youngest Physics professors at University and my mother was a graduate student.  After some reluctance on my father’s part they began seeing each other and married in 1960.   I was born in Kuldīga, Latvia in June of 1965.  We moved to Ventspils , Latvia in 1966 because my mother began working for the Soviet Irbene Locator, which was in charge of spying on NATO countries’ communications.  She was head of the cryptology section and focused on European countries.  After two years we moved to Skrunda , Latvia to be closer to my father and where my mother began working at the Skrunda Radar Station.  The radar stations main task was to control the cosmic space over Western Europe and North America, and to “intercept” ballistic missiles should any be fired at the Soviet Union.

My father, who took a position in the Science and Engineering school at Liepāja University in 1961 would stay in Liepāja for weeks at a time.  However, what he was really doing was working for the KGB.  He was in charge of moving and tracking so called “immigrants” across the Baltic Sea to Sweden.  The so called “immigrants” were actually western trained KGB intelligence agents who actively infiltrated European countries and even the United States for espionage and other spy craft.  You could say he was a spy master.

Because my father was a physics professor he was well suited to oversee the development of devices and techniques employed in KGB spy craft.  One such device was a sound wave generator that would send sound pulses which were beyond human hearing and could make someone ill in order to force them from a their location.  For example, if an agent wanted to infiltrate a room to search for information he could make the occupants ill whereby forcing them to leave the location to seek treatment and allow the agent unfettered access to materials and documents.  This device is still in use today as far as I know.

Disenchanted with soviet rule and the failed promise of socialism, in 1980 my father and mother contacted the CIA to make a deal to get them out of Latvia.  The CIA required they work as double agents to gain access to a top secret list of agents that my father had access to.  This lasted for about a year when we were able to finally take a fishing boat in the dead of night from the port of Liepāja to Gedser, Denmark.  We couldn’t go to Stockholm because there were too many Soviets that would recognize my father and the intelligence apparatus would pick up on our movements.   We then made our way to Kolding, Denmark and after several days we made it to London, England.   We stayed in London for a few months where we obtained new identities and passports. Finally, we flew to the United States and settled in Temperance, Michigan where I graduated in 1983.

Now if you read all this and wondered if this story would make a great novel, maybe it would but it’s all bull shit!  I just took 5 minutes of your time that you’ll never get back…Happy Holidays!  Please don’t tell anyone and just encourage them to read it too.

So, Are you guys getting royalties of The Show "Americans"... ?

[J3st3r]

30 minutes ago, ANGU5 said:

Fucker !!  about time!

 

IKR?  lol

[HarryWeezer]

Well done Joe!

[hxtr]

7 hours ago, JoeCamel said:

Now if you read all this and wondered if this story would make a great novel, maybe it would but it’s all bull shit!  I just took 5 minutes of your time that you’ll never get back…Happy Holidays!  Please don’t tell anyone and just encourage them to read it too.

Well I am sure glad I started at the end before wasting my time reading any of that. I'm just here for the free Cigarettes.

[AthenA]

lol I love the intro ! Welcome in the forums JoeCamel ! 

[UNPROFOR]

I am not going to read that pppffff i am to lazy for that 

welkom to The form joecamel

[LaRSin]

Welcome to the forum and enjoy the servers

[LtLaszlo]

Already an Idiot! Welcome to the site and forums!

[Roxy!]

OMG JoeCamel... you are definitely an IDIOT LOL... Welcome to forums!!! 

[codpiece]

Couldn't make it through your intro post. Only read the last paragraph. Sorry you are forced to introduce yourself yourself to us. 

[Icequeen]

@Bogleg would like you to know Joe that you should stop by the Happy Birthday thread. 

[FRENCHI]

welcome in the forum